View Full Version : How do I get her back
ak_847
Apr 29, 2009, 11:48 AM
I had posted this thread and it got deleted I don't know how.. anywayz I have been with this girl since over 2 years.. our relationship went through ups and downs but we eventually got back.. we have had the best moments of our lives and we both know that.. last time we broke up I convinced her and she said this is the last chance to work out our relat.. we made it perfect loved each other a lot everything went as we wished but a stupid mistake I made a month back ed it up totally.. I had hacked into her friends Facebook account out of revenge.. we hated each other she always instigated her against me which screwed up quite a lot.. this thing came out in the open she thinks my reputation is ed now.. she says she can't forgive me anymore she's had enough.. when the cops called me she kept asking me what's going on are you out of it I got out of it now and now she's not ready to talk o get back.. shes adamant on not getting back.. I know what I did was wrong I told her but she says she can't forgive me this time.. I called her up today tried convinving her but she avoided me I showered her with messages and calls she got irritated fed up and switched off her phone.. later I messaged her and told her I lost it got my fit and did it I told her we can just be friends good friends now on.. she agreed half heartedly.. I know she loves me but doesn't want to get back.. is this the right way to get her back talk to her sometimes be friends meet her once in a while and then try again.. may be she may start missing the good times we had.. I don't want to lose her I want her back I got my exams I can't concentrate I can't eat sleep I smoke lyk a now.. what should be the next step I can take please don say move on help me and tell me what I can do to get her back after being friends which she is not too keen on.. thanks I will appreciate a few replies so that I can keep my options open..
Romefalls19
Apr 29, 2009, 12:28 PM
Move on and let her go. Obviously this relationships was flawed, whether you want to see it or not. She knew when to fold a bad hand, all you can do is accept her decision. Go no contact and read the stickies to help get over this.
ak_847
Apr 29, 2009, 12:32 PM
Move on and let her go. Obviously this relationships was flawed, whether you want to see it or not. She knew when to fold a bad hand, all you can do is accept her decision. Go no contact and read the stickies to help get over this.
I would have let it gone had it been the same thing again that its not working out.. but the thing is I made a mistake and I want her to forgive me.. I want her back.. everyone should get a chance for a mistake they made once.. how do I explain to her
Romefalls19
Apr 29, 2009, 12:35 PM
Nope, not everyone should get a chance. Life doesn't work that way, it sucks but you have to deal with it. The good thing about not getting another chance, you get a better chance to meet someone who you have a better connection with and while right now you may think that she was the only one for you and had a great connection, in time you will see what I am talking about.
Look at KCtiger, Isneezefunny and my old posts to see exactly what we are talking about.
I was just like you, made a few mistakes and wanted another chance. She didn't give it to me when I wanted it, I moved on and met a girl who is now my fiancé. Life has it's way of working itself out, you just have to give it a chance
I wish
Apr 29, 2009, 12:38 PM
When you use the words "last chance," it's usually the beginning of the end of a relationship. Think about it, how can a relationship continue on such thin ice? It can break any second. There's no security at all.
I know it's difficult to let go, but you will have to eventually. You can continue to grieve, but you have to realize that you can't force someone to be with you if they don't feel the same way anymore.
liz28
Apr 29, 2009, 12:52 PM
Everyone get a chance but you might not get a second one. Sometimes all you get it one shot.
You can do all the begging you want but that won't make her chdnge her mind. And if you want my honest opinon she might be getting a good laugh behind all your begging quit it.
You can't get someone back if they don't want you want back. The only thing you can do is learn from this relationship and never repeat the mistake again.
none12345
Apr 29, 2009, 02:58 PM
When you're too desperate to get another chance with someone, you ll do anything for them. Even if you get back together, it will be under her terms and you will always do what SHE wants because you don't want her to leave again which means even if you're unhappy. I think that's an unhealthy relationship.
You should move on and let her go.
sabrewolfe
Apr 29, 2009, 03:20 PM
You don't own this girl, she isn't your property, what makes you think she owes you something? She said it's over because she does not want to be with you anymore. Get over it. You acted very immaturely hacking into some girls Facebook thing, you sound like you need to grow up first before you can handle a relationship. It's over between you and your ex-girlfriend, you can't get her back. Leave the poor girl alone.
talaniman
Apr 29, 2009, 03:39 PM
I had posted this thread and it got deleted I don't know how.. anywayz
You were deleted for lousy spelling, lousy grammer, and chatspeak. And will be again.
ak_847
Apr 30, 2009, 01:50 AM
When you're too desperate to get another chance with someone, you ll do anything for them. Even if you get back together, it will be under her terms and you will always do what SHE wants because you dont want her to leave again which means even if you're unhappy. I think thats an unhealthy relationship.
You should move on and let her go.
I know I acted immature by hacking into her friends account.I have realised my mistake. Right now I feel she is not getting back because she is embarressed of my mistake. We have decided to be friends right now. I told her to take her time and think if she can ever forgive me and get back. May be later once people stop talking about this and she's cooled down she will get back. We are friends now we are meeting tomorrow just for a short drive. What do you people think I should do now how do I behave with her how do I indirectly convinve her. People do forgive in love I would have a lot of people would have forgiven the one they love a few times if he or she has realised the mistake they have made. What should I do from now on what should I tell her I am really confused. Please don't tell me to leave her. I know there is a way to get her back but I don't know what is the way.
Gemini54
Apr 30, 2009, 03:11 AM
i know i acted immature by hacking into her friends account.i have realised my mistake. right now i feel she is not getting back because she is embarressed of my mistake. we have decided to be friends right now. i told her to take her time and think if she can ever forgive me and get back. may be later once people stop talking about this and shes cooled down she will get back. we are friends now we are meeting tommorow just for a short drive. what do you people think i should do now how do i behave with her how do i indirectly convinve her. people do forgive in love i would have a lot of people would have forgiven the one they love a few times if he or she has realised the mistake they have made. what should i do from now on what should i tell her i am really confused. please dont tell me to leave her. i know there is a way to get her back but i dont know what is the way.
i know there is a way to get her back but i dont know what is the way
A bit of a contradiction there! There is no way to 'get her back'. If she just wants to be friends then there is nothing you can do. Accept what she has said and don't make such a fuss. Be genuine, be yourself. Stop behaving like an idiot. You can't do more.
ak_847
Apr 30, 2009, 12:36 PM
OK people thanks a lot for taking interest in my thread and my life. But I don't think I would follow any of your advices. I have thought a lot and have decided what I have to do. I have forced her a lot pressurised her a lot. I did everything I could. But even if she would have got back to me then I would have regretted it. I am going to leave her for a while now. I know I made a mistake a big one but it was forgivable. Love is about love and forgiveness. If she really loved me and cared for me she will get back to me eventually. If she does not I will be more than happy to know it was never worth it because she never really loved me. If she loved me she would have helped me out improve my mistakes changed me as a person that's what love is all about. All you people who think they can get a perfect partner stop living in your dreamworld. I know if she really loved me she will get back if she doesnot it was never worth it because only I know how much I sacrificed compromised and did for her. And what she did for me is not even comparable to that. But I never cared since I always thought she loved me and may be I was a fool. Every person in my situation take my advice though initially I was looking for advices from others.
Thank you
Romefalls19
Apr 30, 2009, 12:59 PM
I disagree with your entire post, for a few reasons.
1. Love isn't about changing someone, it's about understand their faults and differences, but still loving them for that. My fiancé differs from me, she does things that I don't like, just as I do things she doesn't like. We just think that those are trivial and we compromise on things. She doesn't try to change me, I don't try to change her. Whoever told you that love is about changing someone, lied.
2. You should never sacrifice what you feel is right, or your beliefs for someone. They are your beliefs, your thoughts, your feelings, why sacrifice them? Once again, not what I like to think of love as.
3. There is such thing as a "perfect" partner, it's not someone who you have everything in common with, never argue with or usually the first person you love. A perfect partner is someone who understands your imperfections and accepts them as part of your character. Show me a couple that doesn't argue, and I'll tell you that they are deeply troubled, share no communication or share their feelings with.
4. For me, and a lot of others, a breach in trust is the worst thing you can do to them. You broke her trust by hacking her friends myspace, therefore she took it about herself to remove an untrustworthy person from her life.
liz28
Apr 30, 2009, 01:12 PM
Ak_847, your saying your not following the advice (it not advices) and telling readers not to follow it but then you basically said your going leave her alone. Isn't that what we told you, duh.
Your leaving alone because you realize you can force nor pressure her to be with you, the same thing we said. Again duh!
Your post to me makes no sense because it is full of contradictions. So please write your thoughts more clearly and don't try to bash everyone that tried to help you out. Oh, in the future don't act like an idiot by hacking into your girlfriend friend account. Count your lucky stars that you didn't get charge.
none12345
Apr 30, 2009, 02:55 PM
Ak you are going to stay in the friends zone forever. First of all, I think she cares too much of what others think. If she loves you, she wouldn't care what others think especially her friends don't you think?
Second of all don't expect to be more than friends again. And third, its okay you don't want to follow our advice, its your life and you can do whatever you want but in the end you ll see that you should have taken our advice.
You cannot win a girl back or make them change their mind. They will have to come back on their own. And personally, if you want her back, staying friends with her is just the worst move you can do fyi. Im not saying this because I want to help you get back with her, its just to tell you. I think you should find someone that wouldn't leave you ever.
-none12345