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View Full Version : Say I do? Or say I do not take you as my husband?


foxxxyreddd
Apr 20, 2009, 05:37 AM
I have a BF I have been with since 2007. We now have a 5 month old baby boy. I am christain and he is a Muslim. He wants me to convert before he say we can marry in his muslim ceremony.

Also he is not a citizen and his status expires soon. We have been having a few problems recently such as he been veryyyyyyyyyyy busy with work and quality time and I am a little nervous about continuing our relationship unless we can seek a marriage counselor.

He needs my help but I really don't want to help him because of our small problems above . If I don't my child could be without a father in his life, and I was 75% without a father in my life and I 1000% don't want my child to go through that but if I do help I could be a little unhappy with my life.

Hes a GREAT FATHER to his son. He's very responsible. But he wants me to convert and I will not. There as been small talk about me maybe not having to be a muslim.

So if we were to get married , we were going to do his ceremony(muslim) as well as mine(christian). But since I don't want to be a muslim I don't know I if want to marry just in my ceremony only.

So I am just a little confused.

Can someone give me some honest, godly, advice?


Thanks

Heartless
Apr 20, 2009, 06:44 AM
I see your point of view. But just because your not married doesn't mean he can't be apart of your child's life. One thing you need to do is make sure your happy. If you do something and you know that in the long run you won't be happy but you want to do it for your child. You have to understand that your child won't be happy either. A child could feel the neagtivity and the sadness that a mother is feeling. You may not notice it but your pain is contagious and some way or another it has the chances to affect your baby. So think about you and put yourself in 1st place and than take a step forward with precaution! Good Luck!

JoeCanada76
Apr 20, 2009, 07:28 AM
You will not convert to muslim and that is your choice. It is good that you will stand up for your faith. There should be no reason why he can not still be a good boyfriend and father to your child.

He knows you do not want to convert? Well there should always be a way to go about this. You will be unhappy a little in life because??

Do what you feel is best for yourself. Do not convert just to make your boyfriend happy.

This is always a tough one when you have two completely different backgrounds in faith. How will the child be raised? Or will the child be brought up in both faiths or just one. This is something that you need to figure out.

Best wishes to you. The above answer is right on. If your not happy in life, your child will be up on it and feel it too. I do not think you want that, right.

Joe

optimistic
Apr 20, 2009, 07:43 AM
I think that what you should think first is your child if he grow up without a father or mother that will be measurable.
Second is that the man that you want to spend the rest of your life with him being busy is not a reason for separation you might marry him and then he become busy
I respect all religions but you have to think about Islam and read about it I'm sure that you will be happy if you become a muslim
But something very important about your boy friend he is amuslim but his behavior with you is not an islamic behavior because Islam don't permit making a relation ship without being married