Hey my names rachel. I just got back from england. I was looking through all my pics and realized that... I didn't really have that much fun. I'm so frustrated. I just saw the prettiest stuff and it was so amazing and people there were so fationable compared to here but I didn't enjoy seeing all the things that I was. I even saw the queens jewels and I thought it was boring. I come back home and my family is right where I left it. My dad annoying as hell and still drinking even though his christmas present to the family was to stop and still jobless. My mom trying to hold everything together and running a full time job so I barly get to see her after this weekends over. My friends don't really seem that excited that I'm back because I'm not all that close to anyone. I can't tell anybody that its like this for me because either they won't care and ill then feel like lower than dirt and its better not to have told them or they'll want me to get help and have them stay up all night worrying about me and I don't want that for my family and friends. I feel like I'm in a box away from everyone and am so fake to anyone who talks to me. I act so happy but half the time I'm crying. Help me get out of here!

When I read your post I thought I had the answer to your problem but to be honest I don't know what to tell you exactly...

I'm guessing half the people who past here will tell you "get out, start some activities" but to be honest, we all know that won't help.

Maybe what you need to dp is get some alone time. I don't know how that works for you, maybe you can do it in your room or in a park but the point is to be alone for a while and think of goals you want to accomplish.

Once you have your goals set and you reach those goals, you will feel self-worth and regain confidence. That might not be your main problem right now, but it does play a part if you're feeling down.

I wish you best of luck,

-Xm8

Hi, Rachel!

What sort of things do you like to do for fun and recreation, please?

I have a good reason for asking that question.

Thanks!

Yes, what is fun ?

How old are you?

I think most people go through that phase when they think they've got nothing going for them.

I know what I say may seem cheesy but I feel your pain.
I've just come on ask me help desk to ask another one of my questions, and just generally telling people that I am so down, although I may not be in the same position to you, I still understand
my family life may not be great, maybe just under decent. I feel like I have nobody left other than my mum ( I'm an only child, she ran away from my dad when I was little)i feel so pushed out of everything, I was once close to a lot of people and have started to fade away , and nobody cares. All my once used to be friends, have now turned their backs on me, and when confronted over this, they burst down into tears, and say they still want to be mates, but then the next day couldn't care less. I get my feelings trampled over all the time, people think I don't mind, they ignore me, ignore my existence, and even when I speak sometimes people don't listen properly or just completely don't answer. I can't tell my mum anything though. She's already under a lot of stress, she can't take mine, I know , I've tried.
I was once, I young girl, full of confidence, full of happiness, didn't care to be who I am, but now through circumstances, I become withdrawn, shy, and have nothing to say, I feel worthless. I put on a brave face, and act so brilliantly at being happy and care free and peacefully in my own world. I am fake. But really I so sad maybe depressed, completley stressed, and conscious of everyone around . I care so much about everyone, yet they care so little.

I'd do what I'm doing, try and confind in one person, first find them. If you have mates try hard to become closer, sometimes we can't always rely on family unfortunately :(
good luck x

and also I live in england , really it isn't all that good .

One thing you can do is open up to people. Tell them how you feel and what you like to do. Not all people are completely heartless. If you are pretending to be OK they are going to think you are OK. Find someone to tell your feelings to and comfort you.