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View Full Version : Breaking up with girlfriend of 6 years


bigkahuna7
Apr 15, 2009, 11:20 AM
Been with my girlfriend for about 6 years and would like some advice.

I don't love her anymore - we've grown apart and I know it - not sure if she realizes it though.

All the warning signs are there: she talks future and I sit silently; I would rather spend time alone in another room than out where she is; I don't like talking on the phone with her; she always tells me I look miserable; sex is a chore and probably twice a month if that - if I do kid around about it suggest it she just rolls her eyes; the 'love you's are basically rolling off the tongue like 'cya later'; I feel I've lost myself and who I am in this relationship with no answers; I'm more irritated with her about stupid things etc.

She would never initiate anything as far as a breakup - we've talked briefly about issues etc but she just kind of goes on with her bubbly self seemly to ignore it all. We broke up for about a month ( I left) but was really guilty about leaving so ended up back together - which I totally regret. I mean, when is it time to say when? There has to be people out there.. better suited for each of us. I'm not abusive but this is such a dysfunctional and toxic thing to me. Six years is a long time and that's what makes this really hard.

We have also done biz transactions together (some good some bad) and I feel like I OWE her and one of the main reasons I stay, but I'm pulling my hair out over how I feel. I just don't love her like I used to anymore. I still care for her a lot but really afraid to hurt her.

Advice would be nice.

Thank you

safiatu
May 13, 2009, 06:51 AM
It is good to end it now than continue waisting her time.

shazamataz
May 13, 2009, 07:11 AM
It's not fair to her to be stringing her along.
She talks about the future while you are thinking to yourself that you don't want to be with her.

Staying in a relationship with her for 'business reasons' is selfish.

You owe it to her to split so she can find someone else who appreciates her.

talaniman
May 13, 2009, 09:13 AM
I feel like I OWE her and one of the main reasons I stay,


You OWE her the truth.

Justwantfair
May 13, 2009, 09:18 AM
A note on the side...

Relationships are work... everything you have mentioned, is a relationship that you have both stopped working on. Love doesn't stay fresh, relationships do not stay fresh. You have to be willing to put in the time and care in order to have a fulfilling relationship.

A lot of what you discussed is boredom and routine, another option is to put some spice back into your life. :D After six years, it's probably really needed.