I am currently a divorced man of 6 months. I recently reconnected with my childhood sweetheart after 18 years. She is currently in a relationship with a man that has a very questionable past (abuse,alcohol). We luckily found each other online and were still surprisingly living in the same city still. Her relationship with him as she says is ugly, and she wants out but doesn't want to hurt him by doing it. Her and I have spent many many hours talking on the computer or actually in public in secluded places, realizing that there is something very strong still there, as we both have actually come out and stated. A couple of weeks ago we met for dinner and a drink, and needless to say one thing led to another and the unmentionable happened; we both have agreed to never speak a word of it to anyone that even comes close to knowing us, for her protection of course. Now her and I connect on so many different levels, and we share a lot of the same beliefs and desires. Now I feel awful for doing something behind another guys back, so please keep that in mind, and I am not necessarily proud of what I am doing, nor what I have done but there is such a huge draw on my heart to be close to her, that I am constantly thinking about her. He had found some of the letters that we had written back and fourth to each other on the computer and realized who it is that I am and where I live, all the way down to having my phone number... He called me one night and all I could do is hearing her cry and him yelling at her and it spun me in a sense of anger, like I have never felt, almost as if one of our family was in danger. I am much bigger than this guy mind you, and I do realize that doesn't have a whole lot of emphasis on this relationship, but I do think that is partly the reason when he found the letters he wasn't to action oriented. We talk/text/meet quite often, and I have admit, I have never had a feeling that over comes me when she is around me, almost as if a superhuman feeling, like I would do anything to make her happy. Do you think she will ever leave him or am I just being taken on a emotional rollercoaster? Is there anything I can do, as a test to see if she will eventually be true to her word and leave him or is it something I just need to walk away from? Is it possible to actually be addicted to someone, because it honestly feels like there is nothing else more important when she is around? What do I do?

Unfortunately, I'm going to stick with my rule: people in relationships are never available. Ever. Period.

I know that you want to help her, but the best thing that you could do for her is counsel her to leave this abusive man, go stay with family, and get out of that toxic relationship. She shouldn't be thinking of another relationship at this time. She needs to focus on healing herself.

Be her friend, but don't push a relationship... Help her help herself. That's the best thing you could do.

Leave her alone divorced guy, as she is not the same girl as she was when you knew her.

Better to start your new life fresh, and build it correctly, as the last thing you need is to be involved with a cheater, who has her own problems, and drama to deal with.

It's a big red flag when someone is in a relationship they are not happy with. You can't be that lonely can you?

If you are, that's another red flag to pay attention to.