PDA

View Full Version : I came on too strong. What next?


nycityliving
Apr 11, 2009, 01:03 PM
I've been seeing a girl for about a year or so but recently things have been starting to sour. She goes out with her friends a lot and I really only see her a few nights out of the week now for dinner, etc.

That being said, last weekend I was introduced to one of my friend's friends who I was immediately infatuated with. A large group of us went out for dinner/drinks and to a club and, when she wanted to leave, I offered her a cab ride back to her place.

Later that night I was talking to my friend by text and somehow (thanks to my friend) this new girl got roped into the conversation while I was announcing how much I thought she was amazing. At one point I'm sure I was borderline creepy (i.e. telling her things that came across too strong). The next morning I just tried to clear the air by saying "thanks for stopping by, lets catch up again soon". Of course I didn't get a response.

Do you think that I've blown this? What should I do to mend the situation? Is there anyway this girl will be interested if she knows I like her but still working things out with the "soon-to-be" ex?

jeffrey michael
Apr 11, 2009, 01:06 PM
The next morning I just tried to clear the air by saying "thanks for stopping by, lets catch up again soon". Of course I didn't get a response. I think if you said this than you did your best to show you were just trying to be friendly, Give it a little time, maybe to try to set up a casual meeting with her through your mutual friends were you are all in a group and see what happens there. If she is interested I'm sure you will find out then. But don't force the issue. But first and foremost you need to make sure that you and your current girlfriend are over and done with. Don't go and try to make a new relationship with someone else without ending your current relationship!!

redhed35
Apr 11, 2009, 01:52 PM
Hmmm,have girlfriend,will trade for newer model.

So,what's it going to be,see if you can salvage your relationship with current girlfriend,(maybe she's settling into the relationship)nothing wrong with seeing her girlfriends,in fact its good she has her own life too.
But have you messed up with could be future girlfriend,don't know for sure,but do the decent thing and finish with the current girlfriend before embarking on a new relationship.

wantanftw
Apr 11, 2009, 02:03 PM
Give her space for a week or two if you talk to her after that shell know that you aren't coming on too strong because you didn't contact her over a period

charleneD
Apr 13, 2009, 08:42 AM
Yup, sounds like you've blown it. Why not give her a break, clean the air and later see if you still got a shot at it

mudweiser
Apr 13, 2009, 08:51 AM
Sounds like you need to end your current relationship before trying to start a new one.

Sarah

HistorianChick
Apr 13, 2009, 08:54 AM
I always tell people that if they are interested in a person in a relationship they should leave them alone. Period. People in relationships are never available. Ever.

This is an odd case, because YOU are the one in a relationship. Therefore, you shouldn't be available. Period.

Take care of your relationship. Break it off or commit to making it work. Don't pursue someone else until you take care of business.

So yes, you did blow this. Not by what you said or did, but by your status.

liz28
Apr 13, 2009, 08:57 AM
If blown it because your already involve with someone. Before you cheat leave. Or your girlfriend might do what Carrie Underwood did to her boyfriend in her video "Before he Cheats".lol

artlady
Apr 13, 2009, 08:58 AM
Is there anyway this girl will be interested if she knows I like her but still working things out with the "soon-to-be" ex?
Not if she has a brain in her head!
No girl wants to be a rebound and no girl with any self respect hooks up with someone who is taken.

IWHO
May 17, 2009, 06:55 PM
I just read and responded to your other post... and now I see the "rest" of the story... if you are interested in this new girl, do the right thing and end it with the soon-to-be-ex... and as far as this post goes, maybe back away just a hair so you don't seem to come off too strong... and approach her again in a week or so...