I'm a extreme alcoholic... but have taken full responsibility for all my "special needs" child for 8 years. My mother has been my rock and angel to assist in many areas. I'm educated but can't find work (as many) - EVERYONE wants me to stop/quit drinking, but after 34 years, it's how I accomplish things. Been to treatment centers (all they do is TALK TALK TALK), but finally found a Naturalpathic Doctor that says I must detox my insides by infared sauna, hydrotherapy, etc. of which I have no money. But... I was served by my child's Father (unwed, no child support, and no contact with our child for 5 years). My Father contacted him and said take custody of him... I have a Guardian already and he does not see me drink! In the past, but for months I'm with an Angel who helps me help myself and child. So, does he have any right after abanding him and lying on the court doc's??

What do I do now? I don't have a job, and they are trying to ruin 8 years of his life! He would FREAK if he had to live with a "dad", not to mention out of state.

Thank you,

I will be blunt, if you are an extreme drunk and can't find work, and treatment has not helped, you will lose custody of your child to someone who is stable and the child's father.

Expect the father to come to court and bring every dirty secret you have out in court about your drinking.

And a new partner you have only been with for "months' has no rights, even if you were with him for "years" unless he adopted the child.

If you want to get custody, put the drink down today and don't drink another drop, go to AA and stay sober. It is all a matter of what is more important, drinking or your child, it appears you chose drinking years ago over the well being of your child.

If the father is more fit than you are, he can and will get custody. That includes emotionally and physically, employment history, stability.

Is he?

To be even more blunt a child does not have to see you drink in order to know you're an alcoholic.

The fact that he has had no contact for 5 years will have little import. However, if you can prove he has lied to a court, that will have more weight against him.

But, if the can prove you are not stable with an extreme alcoholism problem, he stands a good chance of gaining custody.