I am almost 16. I see people walking around holding hands and I wonder, "why dont I have that?" Yes, I am fat, but I see girls who are bigger than I am who have guys who are really cute. My question is, Why can't I get a boyfriend? I would take just about anyone, seriously, but every time I try, it doesn't work... Why can't I get a boyfriend?:confused::confused::confused::confused:

Well first of all you seem a little desperate and that will make it harder for you to get a boy friend, love usually show up when you don't expect it; not when you're looking for it.

And why on earth do you want to take just anyone? No one should just settle for just anyone. Don't you think that you deserve someone great, that you're interested in and who's interested in you..

I think the first thing you need to do is kick back and relax yourself, something's come when they come... even though you really want a boyf now... there really is no hurry.

As for how to get a boyfriend, well how's your social life? Are you involved in any activities (at school, after school?)

Down playing yourself isn't good and sometime we find someone when we weren't looking so relax. I understand everyone wants someone but you have plenty of time.

Focus on your social life, with activities, and hobbies you enjoy, and if your happy with yourself, you can see the options, and opportunities, that present themselves.

Hey if you don't find love, you'll make friends, and have a good time.

Edited for spelling/chatspeak.


Being fat has absolutely nothing to do with not having a boyfriend. Don't settle for just any guy that comes your way. Try some new hobbies and maybe u will meet a new boy. Try dating someone completely random. Your relationship will probably go better than it would with a guy u already know. Be yourself. I know that sounds dumb... but it really works. Don't try so hard, it causes stress. When your stressed about something, people notice. Stress causes boys to go the other way when they see you, they don't want to get caught up in all of your drama. So basically just chill and you might get a guy.

NEVER settle for just anyone , that may get you a BF but not necessarily someone you can have a successful Relationship with.

Go out and enjoy yourself and just BE yourself , then someone who likes you for who you are will show interest in you eventually.

There's no rush your still very young.

Nothing is more attractive than confidence in self. Desperation on the other hand, is not. If you don't love yourself, why should anyone else?

Work on building yourself up (pick up a hobby, focus on your friendships, do your "own thang"); in other words: have fun being a teenager.

If you just settle for anyone with a heartbeat, you will not get treated the way you want. Then you'll be back here in 6 months posting, "He treats me like crap... but I love him".

Take your time and let love find you.

Everyone else pretty much said it.

Let the guy come from to you. Apply yourself to social activities after school or something. Someone will come just don't stress about it. I know its hard but you got to pull yourself together and go out into the world and be you.

From a guys point of view.. just don't act so desperate to find someone and don't settle for anyone.

Good luck :)

Looking for love never seems to work, men are like buses when you want one there is none there, when you do 3 come at once! But being desperate for love is not good, and seriously taking anyone is not a wise choice. I think you need to wait it out and soon enough someone will come alone. Until then work on yourself, think about what you would like from a man and don't settle for anything.

If you really like this certain boy, then just go up and talk to him. Just make sure he's not in a relationship! It worked the first time I tried and I have a wonderful boyfriend who seems to love me for me. And the whole 'fat' thing... well I am too. And I learned that it has nothing to do with that. Learn to love yourself for you before you try to find a guy. My guy actaully helped boost my confidence up before we dated... but then he made it better when he asked me out :):):):) the desperate thing doesn't work either cause I tried that from 6th grade all the way to last year (im n 11th) I've turned out having a lot of doseys and I got hurt a lot too... and it took a while to recover... think of what you would want in a guy first before you start looking for a guy

And it also seems like you don't respect yourself much...

But don't worry...

When I was your age I wasn't lucky either, even though I was acceptable.. but as I got older, my luck got better(but just because my luck got better it didn't mean I dated the first guy who came to me)... just give it time...

In the end its going to work out fine.. you just need to be in the right state of mind

Just don't rush in to anything, and take life as it comes...

Wanting a date, or a relationship with just any one is a recipe for disaster. Be careful what you ask for, as any bum who gives you attention, or says the right things you want to hear, may not give you a positive experience.

The better relationships are about honest, good clean, fun! That happens when you have fun getting to know each other, and seeing if you both feel the same way. The key word is BOTH.

That takes time to develop, and in the meantime have fun by YOURSELF. Be happy by YOURSELF. That's what attracts people to you.

Oh, trust me, being myself is NOT working.

Tell us about yourself then.

Um. Obviously I like turtles, it wouldn't be in my name if I did not. I am very energetic (for my size) but my personality... people think I am very strange. So that's why being myself doesn't work very welll.

Have confidence! Guys can tell when your faking confidence so you need to find true confidence in yourself and who you are!

Have pride in your morals. Don't be easy! Guys will look at you more as a booty call then a girlfriend.

Girl, I know just what you are going through and going for someone just because they like you and you two have nothing in common but trying to make it work because you want a boyfriend... doesnt work! Try being confident in yourself and ignoring guys altogether... they will come to you when you least expect it. I know its hard but just give it a shot. Worked for me and I'm not a model. Go for it!

At the tender age of 16, it probably seems to you like a major deal not to have a boyfriend. I'm here to tell you it isn't. Don't focus so much on what's out there, rather focus on what's inside (yourself). Be all you can be. While you're doing this, you're growing and muturing more and seeing life on a different level. And, before you know it, you'll attract the right person for the right reasons. Hang in there!

I think all 16 year olds are pretty strange, what makes you different.

Lol, talaniman. You're right we are all pretty strange. But to some people I know, strange is an understatement. Myself confidence is building up by the second but it builds tiny bit by even tinier bit. Which makes it harder on me...

Maybe you should just have fun and enjoy your teenager years without worrying about having a boyfriend. Honestly, you might better off without one right now.

Just because others are walking around with them does not mean you have too. Your 16 years old and have plenty of future to think about it down the road.

lol, talaniman. You're right we are all pretty strange. But to some people I know, strange is an understatement. My self confidence is building up by the second but it builds tiny bit by even tinier bit. Which makes it harder on me...
I can understand that but your confidence will soar when your actively engaged in some fun stuff and make friends with interest similar to yours, both male and female. Relationships (friends or otherwise) don't just happen, they develop over time. Have your fun now.

Um. Obviously I like turtles, it wouldnt be in my name if I did not. I am very energetic (for my size) but my personality... people think I am very strange. So thats why being myself doesnt work very welll.

that sounds like one of my best friends (shes 16 too)^_^... shes twice my size and a very hyperactive person. She's a major twilight fan and would beat anyone who disses edward. She doesn't have a boyfriend (because of this thing called the curse) but she wants one. She told me that she's just waiting on the right guy to come around. But it doesn't bring her down that she doesn't have one. Have more confidience in yourself and don't be afraid to show the real you... and bulieve me... you isn't the only one with the weird personality because I have one too ("\(=^_^=)/")

Sounds just like me... except, I don't know how I feel about twilight.

Well, on the twilight thing I mean... you may like something a lot, you know? And everyone thinks your weird just because your obsessed with that one thing. I mean... like I'm obsessed with certain bands like coldplay and the killers... umm? I like a bunch of really weird things too. I'm a very hyperactive person when it comes to some things and people just don't like to be around me. But I can really care less anymore. I don't know why though? I guess I just got over it you know?

Yeah I know exactly what you mean.

Physical appearances matter yes, but to tell u a little secret appearances are not the only thing u see, confidence is a major 'attraction' factor. We men can't resist confident and smart women, and that's a fact. Be more confident about yourself, and that will show up in your looks. :) . You are only 16 now. Give it sometime.

Ok. But the more I say I am confident with myself, the more people bring me down.

Ok. But the more I say I am confident with myself, the more people bring me down.


When people put you down it's a form of bullying and may just be because their insecure in themselves. If you react to that by showing them it upsets you they will keep doing it.

So the secret is to not let it bother you , that will show out in your personality and will ooze with confidence. When they see this they won't bother you because they know they can't get a rise out of you.

OK...

Ok, can some body help me?

There is this guy named Ian in my school. I met him through a girl named Sam, who has known Ian since 7th grade...
He is a really nice guy, and my delemma is... I think I am in love with him.

I mean, all signs I suppose are there; I have dreams with him in them, my heart skips twenty million beats whenever he looks at me, I even know when he looks at me when I am not looking at him, because of those beats... I wrote a poem about him... IDK this may just be some creepy crush that I should be ashamed of, but guys, I need your input!!

Those are signs of attraction, not love, but I do admit to be excited for you. Now all you have to do is talk to him, and enjoy the friendship.

Friendship is the best way to start any relationship. This always lets you know if you really want to go further or maybe if you'd just like to kick it and be friends. ALWAYS be yourself. No guy who doesn't appreciate you for you is not worth your time of day. Give it time and relax. There's nothing more disgusting when a girl acts like something else to get attention. You can always manage to see right through it... Do you really want to be like that.

Thanks

We are already friends, if he considers me that... I consider him a friend... IDK...

Ice cream. Ask him out for ice cream.

Ice cream. Ask him out for ice cream.


Awwwwwwwww.. That's such a great idea!

I felt bad because today I asked him and Sam to the movies, (you know, as a group) But sam said she couldn't go and spoke for Ian... I tried to talk to him throughout the day but I never saw him :(.

Okay listen I know how you feel I had the same problem but after that I got tired of it and I went up there and wasn't shy and you seem a little desperte that's bad. You should do sports and be active and maybe go on a diet it will help a little more and don't be afraid ask him out it doesn't matter what other people think its your personal life but all I have to say is go get um:D

:Dyou seem despert don't be and go on a diet and be active don't be shy just ask tem out it don't matter what people think just go get um

Is the desperate thing REALLY that noticeable?!

I try not to be desperate, and to tell the truth, I not anymore, because I found the one I like, just haven't figured out a way to get my hold on him.