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T0RM
Feb 19, 2009, 08:49 AM
Hi there I am in need of some answers and finding it hard to find, unless I go to a legal company to find them out but beforehand hoping you can help on this one.

I have been with my partner for 3 years now and we have a child who is coming up to 15 weeks. He has been separated form his wife now for 5 years, he lives with his mother at present until I move nearer to him which at moment is hard with credit crunch on etc etc...

Anyway he is still married and she has known about me for ages and the baby but she will not divorce, she said she married for keeps and it is her husband etc etc...

Even though he has told her he will never go back to her and does not love her she can not accept this, we do not know what to do now, do we or can we go forward to a court and make her sign papers? After 5 years can this be possible his children are gronw up now have their own children apart form his son who lives at home with his mum, so nothing to worry about with children he left the home as it is council anyway and has no ties apart form he still pays her money as they had debt together which he will continue to pay until it has finished.

She still loves him she has told him that and like I have said he does not love her, we are ggoing round and round in circles and we would like to get married next year but how can we when she refuses to meet halfway knowing that they will never be together again.
I have not been bitter about anyhting as it was his life before we met and he was straight with me and told me the circumstances, she has never been left in the dark either so knows all about us and baby but ssem to be making it hard for us to have a life.
Any advice would be aprreciated

Thanks

T0RM

artlady
Feb 19, 2009, 09:00 AM
The following link may be of help

Can You Refuse to Sign Divorce Papers? | eHow.com (http://www.ehow.com/about_4570582_can-refuse-sign-divorce-papers.html)

0rphan
Feb 19, 2009, 09:08 AM
Hi there... I don't know where your from, but in the UK... if the couple have been separated for a certain amount of time, living their own lives, then yes they can divorce, even if the wife refuses, it can be taken to a solicitor who will decide the best way to go and will advise you accordingly.

If you cannot afford a solicitor, please seek out an... Advice Bureau... there number will be in any telephone book and there is sure to be a local one very near.

I think you have to make an appointment now, plus they only open certain days, they are very good and will know the legalities and the correct proceedures that you need to take.

As you say the children from his previous relationship are independent now, plus there is no property to haggle over, there is no reason why you should not be together.

Can you possibly move in with him and his mother, it would make life a whole lot easier all round.

Goodluck

T0RM
Feb 19, 2009, 09:57 AM
Well at the moment can not move in with him as I own my own house so be pointless plus his mum is not well she is narly 80 and he cares for her. Only a 2 bed place and I have children so that would be a bit overcrowded.

I am in the uk so advice is helpful thank you

0rphan
Feb 19, 2009, 10:54 AM
Hi Torm... yes I see your problem and ofcoarse he must look after his Mum.

Maybe they could come on a visit for a while or is she a bit frail.

Does Mum own her house or is it possible that she might move in with you ?

I know sometimes senior people prefer to stay in their own place, which is usually where all their memorys are and where they have spent their whole life.

Not to worry, go and get some advice from the Advice Bureau or put your case to a solicitor ( usually 30 min's free ) who deals with legal advice in this field.

Goodluck