Okay, my brother has a 6 yr old child with this woman. They were already separated when he found out she was pregnant & she didn't allow him to see the child until he was 2. He was seeing him but with no legal orders or anything. She moved away suddenly & basically disappeared for 2 years. Year before last,she contacted him & wanted him to consent for her new husband to adopt their child. He refused & wanted to see his son. He got a lawyer(a bad one) & contested the adoption. He was able to stop the adoption but his lawyer never took the proper actions to get him visitation. The mother took the child & moved away again. She continued to insist that he consent to the adoption. After a year of nothing ever happening legally,he became discouraged and agreed. He signed a copy but apparently she gave him the wrong papers or something. So she wants him to sign them again but he has decided that he wants to change lawyers & pursue getting his rights to this child.

Okay,my question is - does he have any chance of doing this after agreeing to sign the papers? The copy he signed is not legal.

Please,no responses about how stupid he is & how he shouldn't have signed them. We all know he's an idiot.

Any help would be great. He wants some advice before he spends the money on another lawyer.

If he didn't sign the right papers, it basically means nothing. The adoption isn't legal until the correct papers are signed, notorized and filed with the court.

Yes, he can get a lawyer and get his visitation. That will be a tough battle though since from all I can tell, the child is 6 and hasn't had much of a relationship with your brother.

Thanks. He definitely understands that. As I said,his last lawyer just basically strung him along for as much money as she could. He does have documents where he has asked for visitation if it will help him any. He's just scared that signing that one copy will make it even harder.

No, signing the document doesn't matter. People can and do change their minds. What will matter is how hard he's tried for custody and visitation over the years, if he's paid support, whether he can prove he's attempted to be the child's father.

Even if the document were legal and not yet filed he could stop the process.

I've asked questions on here for my brother before so this is the same case. He has a son & wants visitation rights to him. The mother tried ot have her husband adopt my brothers son. This is in Alabama. The mother now lives in Georgia but still has an Alabama attorney. My brother had an attorney in Alabama but she had to have been the worst ever. He is living in Florida and wants to pursue getting his rights. Does he need an attorney in Alabama or can he get one in Florida?

Thanks.

Where is the court action taking place, if the child custody agreement is in Alabama and that is where they are fighting, that is where the attorneys will be.

If he makes a motion for it to be moved to Georgia and the mother agrees, it could be moved there.

Yes,it is in Alabama. Thanks.

I merged your threads, please don't start a new thread for the same issue.

As noted, if there is an existing court action, it has to be continued there. However, if the child now lives in GA, a change of venue can be requested.

You never answered if there was a custody/visitation order in place.

No orders placed. His lawyer stopped the adoption but stalled and stalled about filing for visitation. He ended up paying over $3000 and she never filed any motions for visitation or anything else.

Well, either he need a new lawyer or he needs to get her off the stick. Filing for custody/visitation should have been part of the whole process.

I'm glad to hear some one else say that. She was terrible & he did fire her. So she withdrew his contestment to the adoption,claiming she had to withdraw all motions placed or something. I mean, honestly, my brother's not the smartest guy,especially when it comes to legal issues. I think she realized that & just took what she could. He is looking into getting a new lawyer.

Hmm, I'm not so sure she HAD to remove all pending actions, just remver herself as the attorney of record. He MAY have a malpractice suit against her.

Okay, I have an urgent question on this case! My bro fired his lawyer,he could not afford to pay her anymore since nothing was happening. Well she claimed that in order for her not to represent him,she had to withdraw his Motion to Contest the Adoption. I do not know if she actually had to do this so someone please let me know. But anyway,the adoption is no longer contested because of that but my bro is looking into a new lawyer. Right now,he does not have enough for the retainer but we're afraid that the mother has figured out that he is trying to get a new lawyer. So is there a way to contest the adoption without legal help? Because if she finds that the Motion to Contest has been withdrawn,she may try to proceed with the adoption without his consent. Is that possible?So someone please help me out with this. Thanks.

I don't think it matters, because the court is going to want him to acknowledge that he agrees to the adoption.

But have him go down to the court and ask the status of his Motion to Contest. If its been withdrawn, ask that it be reinstated without an attorney of record.

Ok,thank you so much. Will that do that with no trouble or should he call and ask about it first? Because he lives in Florida & he will have to make a trip to Alabama for any legal proceedings.

Not sure. Definitely call first. Does he know anyone in the area of the court that can go and repsresent him?

I live closer than he does if they would allow me. I could have it done in the next week. It's always hard for him to get weekdays off from work.

Thank you so much! You are so helpful!

He may need to fax you a limited Power of Attorney for you to act in his behalf in reference to this case.

Ok,I will definitely tell him what you said so he can call & find out! Thank you so much!

Good luck and keep us posted

I will, Thanks again!

Well,my brother called the probate court & they advised him to get legal help & said they can neither give legal advice or give out any forms. I don't think she fully understood the situation but I guess he is going to wait until he gets his new lawyer. ScottGem, you said that you did not think the judge would award the adoption w/o his consent,right? You do not think they will do it until they have consent even though the adoption was never legally granted or denied? His withdrawing his motion to contest would not count as consent,would it? I'm sorry Im asking so many questions. My brother acts tough some times but I know how much he wants to see his son. I don't want him to miss out on any more years of his life.

Well,my brother called the probate court & they advised him to get legal help & said they can neither give legal advice or give out any forms. I dont think she fully understood the situation but I guess he is gonna wait until he gets his new lawyer. ScottGem, you said that you did not think the judge would award the adoption w/o his consent,right? You do not think they will do it until they have consent even though the adoption was never legally granted or denied? His withdrawing his motion to contest would not count as consent,would it? I'm sorry Im asking so many questions. My brother acts tough some times but I know how much he wants to see his son. I dont want him to miss out on any more years of his life.


Your brother needs an Attorney who has the ability to look at ALL papers on file and make a legal determination as the status of this adoption - and he needs to do this NOW.

I know,He just doesn't have the retainer price right now. Is it wrong on his part that he is letting her think that he might still sign the papers? This was honestly my idea so she wouldn't try to have things done before he could afford a lawyer. I don't want to get him in trouble.

Can my brother represent himself, should he need to, until he gets an attorney? The mother found out that he was not signing the papers & is threatening further action on the fact that he did sign 2 copies & withdrew his contestment. He honestly can not afford to hire a lawyer on short notice so can he represent himself?

He can try, but its not recommended, especially if the other side has an attorney.

What can they do if he does not have an attorney? Can they grant her the adoption on that?

If he tries to go up against an attorney, the attorney will know all the tricks of the trade. So the odds are that he will lose his case for visitation. Since he did sign the adoption papers he might lose that case as well.

Wow,okay,Thanks a lot. I'll see if I can't help him get the money up.

I was wondering if sending the mother's lawyer a refusal to consent would mean anything? Also,could my brother file a refusal to consent with the court until he obtains a lawyer? Because they can not grant the adoption with out his consent so we were thinking maybe this could buy a little time.

Its worth a try. I would file it as a recant or repudiation of his original signing of the document.

Ok,can he file this with the court with out a lawyer? He tried calling & talking to them but they pretty much said they couldn't give him legal advice. He probably didn't explain the situation very clearly to them or he was talking to the wrong person. If you think it's possible to do this with the court, I may make a trip with him down there to ensure he gets the correct things done.

Anyone can file a motion with the court in a case they are involved in. What he should be asking the court is what the process is. That they can advise. He probably asked what he should do.

Yeah,probably so. All of you guys are so helpful. Thanks a lot!

Well,the court told him he had to get a lawyer. Do you all think I should get a second opinion on this? We asked about a refusal to consent and a recant of his withdrawal. They said he needed a lawyer either way.

Okay,can every one give me an honest opinion? The child's mother is trying to convince my brother that he could never get rights & stuff like that. After reading the original post I posted and knowing the facts, do you all think he does have a chance of seeing him? I am trying to convince him that he has rights but I want some second opinions to show him. So please give me an honest response.

I think he has rights, he just has to fight for them. The only thing standing in the way is that he did sign the Relinquishment of rights, but he has the right to repudiate that as long as the adoption wasn't finalized.

Ok,well also to help him out, the papers were done wrong so they were never put into the legal system. Also,she has been emailing him & admitted that she's never wanted him to have anything to do with his son.Could that help him if she tries to say that she's wanted my brother in the child's life? She is being very immature about it,she's trying to threaten him with money issues to sign the papers. Do you think this could be that she's worried that he could get his rights?

And ScottGem,you are truly the greatest! Thank you so much. You are so helpful to me!

Anything that questions her veracity will help.

Im sorry,I hate to sound unedcuated but what exactly does veracity mean? =/

How would I go about getting information on a child being removed from a parent's custody through DHR? Can I even do that?

Depends on the state and your relationship to the case/child/parent losing custody.

It is in Alabama & the person wanting information is the child's parent. Do you know how this could be done?

The parent should be able to visit their office (do not call or email) and speak to a case worker that would be able to give them any relevant details... unless that was the parent losing custody. Then the parent would likely need a lawyer.

Ok thanks, He is the father,He's never had custody. The mother lost custody to the child through the DHR but she now has custody of the child again. He is trying to get his rights to the child and he doesn't know what happened with the DHR.

If the mother has custody again, it should be a simple matter of going back to family court and requesting his visitation rights.

Yeah,it hasn't been that simple. It's my brother. I have another post about that issue if you wouldn't mind reading it & giving your advice!

Im familiar with your other thread. The advice is sound and remains the same... get a new lawyer - one who is actually willing and able to address the whole situation.

Okay,thanks. =) He has spoken with one & will be meeting her for a consult next week. She wants all information & any evidence he has. Should he include some of the conversations with her in which she has been lying about her "changed" lifestyle or where she admitted that she's never wanted him to see the child?

Give her everything - regardless of relevance. It's the lawyers job to sift through it all and determine what is salient and what is not.

Okay thanks. His lawyer before did not do her job very well. She did not even help him to find out if he had an order for child support or not. She gave his case papers she had pulled off the computer & told him to go look them up! I am hoping that this new lawyer can help him out this time.

Okay,since I brought up the subject of child support... How can he find out if he does owe support? The case papers she gave him showed an order being placed but then
"Court action disposed by dismissall with out prejudice"
"c001(mother) disposed by dismissall with out prejudice"
"d001(father) disposed by dismissall with out prejudice"
"order"
"notice sent to plaintiff attorney"

Does this mean that the order was dropped? He can't find any record of the support through the DHR. This is in Alabama. Does any one know how he could find out for sure?

Looks to be like the case was dismissed and no order entered. You might check if Alabama has rules that all support go through DHR. Some states do that.

But if no one has come after him for support its unlikely it was ordered.

The mother swears he owes child support but she isn't very credible. She says the case was through the DHR but DHR has no current record of it. I have e-mailed her & asked her for the case number but I doubt she will give it to me.

The mother swears he owes child support but she isn't very credible. She says the case was through the DHR but DHR has no current record of it. I have e-mailed her & asked her for the case number but I doubt she will give it to me.

Tell her your son will be happy to pay support if she presents an order that indicates how much he has to pay and to whom.

It's my brother actually. =) & He has told her time & time again. She always says that he's never paid child support but she has never given him a way too. He used to give her money but that never was reported.

It's my brother actually. =)

Whoops, sorry. This thread has been going on for awhile so I forgot. The relationship. I would suggest that his attorney send her a letter stating what I said so its on the record.

Well we've been on the phone all day,trying to find some type of support. He has to call the main Alabama DHR at 3 & see what they have to say. I am starting to think he doesn't owe anything but we'll see.

Okay guys, my brother has spoeken with every one through the DHR & he owes no child support at all. When I e-mailed the mother & asked her if he did owe & how he could find out information, this is what she said to me...

"6 years of not being there and not paying nothing is plenty enough WE dont need anything else
!the only time he has ever seen him was when I tried 2 make it work HE has NEVER EVER tried on his own free will 2 do anything!WE know the case exsists and thats all that matters.I have even looked it up and it shows NO Payments EVER!!I would not show up online if he didnt owe anything LOL
SO try your lies with some one else!!!!!
....WHEN we go 2 court you and I will then see who lied about the child support.
you and I have no reason 2 talk so do not email me again..none this has anything 2 do with you.If any of it was really that important,you wouldnt be the one emailing."

Immature, yes? My question is could she be telling the truth or is that just ridiculous talk? All Alabama cases go through the DHR. And even if he does, can she even try to use that against him,when she is clearly witholding information about it?

The state of Alabama has confirmed that my brother owes no child support whatsoever. The mother is swearing that she "made a call" to prove herself but the DHR said he doesn't owe a dime unless she filed in another state. So I will give everyone an update after he meets with his lawyer! Thanks for all the advice, everyone!

Okay, so my brother has met with a few different lawyers. Price-wise, they are all about the same. So we were wondering with this case, what should the lawyer propose to do? Each lawyer has a different idea on how to proceed. My brother dowsn't know any of the legal stuff & obviously, I'm not too sharp on it either or I wouldn't always be asking you wonderful guys!

We're just trying to get an idea of what should happen before he chooses a lawyer. He doesn't need to go back down the same path as he did with the last lawyer!

Any advice would be appreciated.

My advice - and I work with any number of lawyers in any number of law firms - ?

Pick the one you are most comfortable with, have the best relationship with and go with that one.

That assumes experience (and cost, of course) are equal or close to equal.

Well that was every1's advice with his first lawyer & he really liked his first lawyer. She was easy to talk to, made him feel real confident about the situation then did nothing to help him out.

He has 1 lawyer who says he should go ahead & file for visitation & child support then deal with any hurdles he has to face. ( I agrred with this 1 but his last lawyer acted as if this couldn't be done!)
Another lawyer suggests he(the lawyer) try to work out a deal with theirs and avoid court. I doubt the mother will go for this!
And another says to prepare the case but wait until the mother takes him to court.

Honestly, out of these 3 plans, which do you think would be the best?

If an Attorney collected fees and did nothing, then that Attorney should be reported to the Bar Association. Yes, it's drastic but the client should be informed about how/why the case was handled.

I think attempting to work out a deal - from what you have posted - is a waste of time and money.

Personally, because I'm not good at waiting around for something would happen, I would go with the Attorney who says to file now and deal with things as they occur.

Thanks guys! I agree that wasting money bargaining with the mother's lawyer would be a waste of time. My brother's just so skeptical & discouraged about everything at this point.

I understand why he feels this way - that's why the proactive Attorney is better than the "reactive" Attorney.

Oh & his last lawyer always claimed to be waiting on the mother's lawyer to get back in touch with her. (She says she called & left messages,etc.) She blamed it on the mother's lawyer for stalling but it is myunderstanding now that the mother really has no part in the father filing for visitation.