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View Full Version : Where do I find out the rights of foster parents in OK?


Orange2008
Feb 9, 2009, 07:20 PM
I'm not talking about the Bill of Rights or Summary of Foster parents rights they give you online: OKDHS.org - Foster Care: Summary of Foster Parents Rights & Responsibilities (http://www.okdhs.org/programsandservices/foster/docs/rights.htm)

Do foster parents have rights beyond what you are told? I have heard that foster parents do have a lot more rights then they are told, but I cannot seem to locate any. Does anyone know where I could find this?

I heard a child under a certain age in your home a certain amount of time - you could have the right to adoption at some point. I'm not sure, but I'd like to find out.

startover22
Feb 10, 2009, 08:55 AM
You can talk to the child's case worker. I am almost sure to say, after a year, they like to look for permanent placement. Which means perm foster care or adoption. As you know they would rather adoption... and as you probably know the funding for that child stops. You adopt, so you are fully responsible. I wouldn't look on line for further info, I would start calling people if you are serious. The child's social worker is the best place to start. Good luck.

Orange2008
Feb 10, 2009, 03:00 PM
I don't completely trust the child's social worker. She isn't working with us as a team. I feel left out of the team. We are in a different county then the parents so we have a secondary worker here. But, I'm afraid to ask questions because we have already been threatened to move the children if we weren't willing to drive to the parents for visits. Also, in OK, they wait 15 months to move for termination. And also in OK, with a sibling group, there is funding beyond adoption until they are 18. We are fostering 3 little ones, I had just mentioned the youngest because someone said they thought we could move towards adoption on this one already after 6 months of being in our home. I just need to know what rights we have. The focus of the caseworker is to move the kids back home and she has never really talked to us about adoption. The secondary worker has, but I don't want to miss out on anything that we could do to move things along.

The parents delayed the case almost 6 months by refusing to accept the treatment plan from July to Dec. We went to court over & over only to have things delayed again. Finally, in Dec, we got them going on a treatment plan, but we have no real idea of how they are doing. The caseworker, like I said, is leaving us out by just saying "they are working their treatment plan", but at the same time we know they are homeless without jobs (which is also part of the plan). I'm very frustrated with the system and being treated like a low paid employee that is just to do what I am told. Understand?

I just want someone to be an avocate for the kids and so far, I don't see it. I need help to know what we can do.

startover22
Feb 10, 2009, 04:15 PM
I don't completely trust the child's social worker. She isn't working with us as a team. I feel left out of the team. We are in a different county then the parents so we have a secondary worker here. But, I'm afraid to ask questions because we have already been threatened to move the children if we weren't willing to drive to the parents for visits. Also, in OK, they wait 15 months to move for termination. And also in OK, with a sibling group, there is funding beyond adoption until they are 18. We are fostering 3 little ones, I had just mentioned the youngest because someone said they thought we could move towards adoption on this one already after 6 months of being in our home. I just need to know what rights we have. The focus of the caseworker is to move the kids back home and she has never really talked to us about adoption. The secondary worker has, but I don't want to miss out on anything that we could do to move things along.

The parents delayed the case almost 6 months by refusing to accept the treatment plan from July to Dec. We went to court over & over only to have things delayed again. Finally, in Dec, we got them going on a treatment plan, but we have no real idea of how they are doing. The caseworker, like I said, is leaving us out by just saying "they are working their treatment plan", but at the same time we know they are homeless without jobs (which is also part of the plan). I'm very frustrated with the system and being treated like a low paid employee that is just to do what I am told. Understand?

I just want someone to be an avocate for the kids and so far, I don't see it. I need help to know what we can do.

They (the kids) should have a lawyer already. Have you contacted them yet?

startover22
Feb 10, 2009, 04:20 PM
For the record - YOU & WHOEVER ELSE THAT LIVES IN YOUR HOME THAT IS 18 AND OLDER DON'T THE RIGHT TO PRIVACY BECAUSE YOU HAVE SOMEONE ELSE'S CHILDREN IN YOUR HOME. DID YOU KNOW YOU HAVE NO RIGHTS TO SPEAK OF? THAT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE A CONTRACTED LICENSED STATE CONTRACTOR. IF THOSE PARENTS WANTED THEY COULD TURN YOUR LIFE UP-SIDE-DOWN! BELIEVE IT - I MAKE THE FOSTER CARE PROVIDERS THAT ARE HOLDING MY SWEET LIL HOSTAGE LIVE IN FEAR OF GOING TO PRISON! "Why you ask?"
BECAUSE THEY ARE - PERIOD!

You are probably very, very in the dark about lots of things, which I wont hold against you. SO I want you to disprove what I'm telling you. Before you got your license were you trained on anything in particular? Were you trained in promoting the reunification process? And how do you know the parents are homeless? Did you give them some spare change before? Did you see them taking refuge inside of an old whirlpool refrigerator box in some alley somewhere? The truth is, you only know what you have been fed. The case worker is not your friend - she is a very dangerous agent of the state. Why would ask her anything anyway? Think she might fudge the reports a lil to get the judge to show you favortism?? Most case worker do that with every case. That's why most get sued - and plenty go to prison which makes me feel warm and tingly ALL OVER. And then what happens to those care providers that are kept in the dark - think they go unpunished? Why the Feds come EVERYONE goes... Be smart. These children have have a mom and dad that love those kids no matter what you may think or feel. What about that woman that carried those babbies for nines months - why can't you have mercy on her? What did she do to you? And here's my final question which I PRAY YOU WILL SEEK THE ANSWER FOR...

How do you know that this case against the parents is not based on fraud by CPS/DHS??? Not wanting to know the truth about that is like praying to be arrested by the FBI for conspiring to commit all kinds of civil rights violations against the parents. And if that were to just so happen to you, where do you really think your own kids would go?
Find the answers to those questions on your own...

As I understand that in your case, this is the identity of the social workers that you have an image... but this is not what happens in EVERY case. I sure wish you would have had a better experience. And no I won't ask you WHY your children got taken away from you. Many times it could be a "mistake" that the state is not willing to admit, but this does not happen every time.
I do agree that when you have to deal with the case workers, they work on their time, their findings, and their way or the high way. They have to, they are over worked and do not have any time for drama or B.S... again, I am sorry for your experience.

Orange2008
Feb 10, 2009, 07:13 PM
For the record - YOU & WHOEVER ELSE THAT LIVES IN YOUR HOME THAT IS 18 AND OLDER DON'T THE RIGHT TO PRIVACY BECAUSE YOU HAVE SOMEONE ELSE'S CHILDREN IN YOUR HOME. DID YOU KNOW YOU HAVE NO RIGHTS TO SPEAK OF? THAT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE A CONTRACTED LICENSED STATE CONTRACTOR. IF THOSE PARENTS WANTED THEY COULD TURN YOUR LIFE UP-SIDE-DOWN! BELIEVE IT - I MAKE THE FOSTER CARE PROVIDERS THAT ARE HOLDING MY SWEET LIL HOSTAGE LIVE IN FEAR OF GOING TO PRISON! "Why you ask?"
BECAUSE THEY ARE - PERIOD!

You are probably very, very in the dark about lots of things, which I wont hold against you. SO I want you to disprove what I'm telling you. Before you got your license were you trained on anything in particular? Were you trained in promoting the reunification process? And how do you know the parents are homeless? Did you give them some spare change before? Did you see them taking refuge inside of an old whirlpool refrigerator box in some alley somewhere? The truth is, you only know what you have been fed. The case worker is not your friend - she is a very dangerous agent of the state. Why would ask her anything anyway? Think she might fudge the reports a lil to get the judge to show you favortism?? Most case worker do that with every case. That's why most get sued - and plenty go to prison which makes me feel warm and tingly ALL OVER. And then what happens to those care providers that are kept in the dark - think they go unpunished? Why the Feds come EVERYONE goes... Be smart. These children have have a mom and dad that love those kids no matter what you may think or feel. What about that woman that carried those babbies for nines months - why can't you have mercy on her? What did she do to you? And here's my final question which I PRAY YOU WILL SEEK THE ANSWER FOR...

How do you know that this case against the parents is not based on fraud by CPS/DHS??? Not wanting to know the truth about that is like praying to be arrested by the FBI for conspiring to commit all kinds of civil rights violations against the parents. And if that were to just so happen to you, where do you really think your own kids would go?
Find the answers to those questions on your own...

Well, this case is a little different. I find out what's going on with the parents BEFORE DHS knows. Why? Because these parents are my first cousin & his wife. I know they have been evicted 4 times since the case began, but only recently were they actually locked out of the house with a big NO TRESPASSING sign in front. Why do I know? My cousin (his brother) drove over there to see if they were still in the house. So, they may be staying at someone else's place, but they do not have their own place.

I also know that neither parent has had a job in 4+ months doing odd jobs on the side. They tell DHS that they are self-employed, but I know the truth because my cousin (the brother) ends up doing the work for them that the father claims he can do. My dad & my cousin are in business together so it doesn't take much for information to come my way.

And trust me, if my family could have good things to say, they would. They ALL want the kids to go home, but these parents just don't seem to get it together. It is their choice, not ours.

As for the case, the state didn't make up a lie to take the kids. It's unfortunate, but it is what it is. I just won't go into that! But, they still have the opportunity to get the kids back.

And we have been shown no favortism in court. The caseworker talks tough, but then never follows through. She works hard to help them get their kids back. I'm sure she is frustrated that they can't seem to get it together. Her exact words to me recently "The visit will be in *** because I do not think the parents will ever drive to *** to visit their children, this way we can show that we did active efforts with this family to visit their children."

You need to remember that not all cases are like yours. I hope you can find a way to work with the system (whether you like it or not) so you can resolve your situation quickly.

And by the way, this isn't what I was asking about at all. I know foster parents have rights, I just need to find them.

Orange2008
Feb 10, 2009, 07:15 PM
They (the kids) should have a lawyer already. Have you contacted them yet?

I spoke to the attorney many months ago. But, they don't even speak in court. I wonder why they are there. They don't seem to care at all.

startover22
Feb 11, 2009, 10:20 AM
I am sorry if you already told me, I don't have time to go back and read it again... do YOU have a lawyer? Do the parents have one? This needs to be delt with and I am not sure by what I am putting together from both of your threads if you can do this without one. Sounds to me this is another one of those games they seem to be caught in. You know the I made a mistake but don't want to admit it so I will make everyone's life hell so I don't get in trouble... that game. I assume you have written letters and participated without giving them too much grief, right?

Orange2008
Feb 17, 2009, 10:08 AM
I am sorry if you already told me, I dont have time to go back and read it again....do YOU have a lawyer? Do the parents have one? This needs to be delt with and i am not sure by what i am putting together from both of your threads if you can do this without one. Sounds to me this is another one of those games they seem to be caught in. You know the I made a mistake but dont want to admit it so I will make everyones life hell so I dont get in trouble...that game. I assume you have written letters and participated without giving them too much grief, right?

I don't have my own attorney. The kids have an appointed attorney (which seems to be no help) and the parents have a hired attorney (which I don't know how they afford).

I'm a little confused by your post. Are you saying that I need my own attorney just to find out what rights I have? Are you saying I can find this out writing letters?

What I am trying to do is see if I can push the system, but I want to have all my rights in place. I already know the rights listed on the website and the caseworkers don't even meet those. We have the right to know when they are meeting on this case & have a say in what happens. We have NEVER been told about meetings OR been asked our opinion about what should happen in this case. We are totally left out, which goes against what the system says should be our rights.

My main concern is making sure I know what I can & cannot do before I start any stir. If this means I need my own attorney, then I guess I'll see about getting one. I just don't want DHS creating trouble for us because we start to push for our rights, make sense?

Now, if I'm misunderstanding what you are saying/asking, please let me know.

And both my threads are not really related. The other one is concerning our 2003-04 foster kids (referral) and this one is concerning our current foster kids' situation. That is why I posted 2 threads.

startover22
Feb 17, 2009, 08:43 PM
Orange, if you push them to the fullest, you will need to get a lawyer. I know it all seems unfair, but in any case, you don't want to be without good help. I know it is frustrating and I know it shouldn't be. When talking to the kids' case worker when I was fostering, I always felt intimidated, I always felt as if I couldn't have my say, and when I did, they would always over ride me. Made me mad, but for the sake of the kids I did not make a stink. UNTIL after the case was let go. The mom, and the kids suffered tremendously and would have suffered even more if we would have made any "big" moves. So my only advise at this point, get a lawyer to ensure this won't be the case. Good luck.

Orange2008
Feb 18, 2009, 01:58 AM
Orange, if you push them to the fullest, you will need to get a lawyer. I know it all seems unfair, but in any case, you don't want to be without good help. I know it is frustrating and I know it shouldn't be. When talking to the kids' case worker when I was fostering, I always felt intimidated, I always felt as if I couldn't have my say, and when I did, they would always over ride me. Made me mad, but for the sake of the kids I did not make a stink. UNTIL after the case was let go. The mom, and the kids suffered tremendously and would have suffered even more if we would have made any "big" moves. So my only advise at this point, get a lawyer to ensure this won't be the case. Good luck.

I was hoping for a link, a list of rights (law) so I could study & mull over them. I guess I'm forced to try to get legal help with this. But, I do not want to make the kids suffer so I've done the same thing. I've let stuff go when it really makes me upset to have orders barked at me like I'm an errand girl or something. I don't understand the system because the foster homes are the vital link to their system working. We do the WORK to love, nurture and help the children. This is the point of their system anyway is to help children, right? OH, I know better then to answer that question because I believe they have lost sight of the real goal here.

Part of the problem for me is that the youngest child is 9-1/2 months old now. She doesn't know any other parent. These people have skipped so many visits, she doesn't know them at all. I just cannot imagine sending her back to them now - she would be so distraught - especially IF mom has another baby in June. She will no longer fulfill the need of baby - she'll be toddling around without attention. Oh, HOW SAD! I cannot even fathom that day coming. The older two at least know their parents.

startover22
Feb 18, 2009, 08:37 AM
Orange, you have a big heart. Let me look into this a little further, I may provide a few links. Give me till Friday... ok?

startover22
Feb 18, 2009, 09:11 AM
Foster Parents' Rights - (http://library.adoption.com/articles/foster-parents-rights.html)
I found this, but earlier I think you had said you already had this... let me know

startover22
Feb 18, 2009, 09:14 AM
Child and Family Welfare - System (http://library.adoption.com/articles/child-and-family-welfare-system.html)
So I am rummaging through and find many things to click on. If you Google "Foster parent rights" it comes up with a billion websites. I will look through later to see about researching your exact question but I suppose you need to be very clear in what that is. Knowing your rights is important, but which one do you want exactly?

babysaver
Jan 29, 2010, 10:13 PM
If the children's attorney ad litem is advocating appropriately for the children, he or she can be fired. I know that in TX 12 months to get their children back. Sometimes parents can request a 6 month extension if they can't meet their service plan. God bless you for being a foster parent.

JudyKayTee
Jan 30, 2010, 09:27 AM
If the children's attorney ad litem is advocating appropriately for the children, he or she can be fired. I know that in TX 12 months to get their children back. Sometimes parents can request a 6 month extension if they can't meet their service plan. God bless you for being a foster parent.


I don't see the Attorney being "fired" for advocating appropriately - it is the job of the GAL to advocate on behalf of the children. The fact that one side or the other feels the advice is not advantageous and/or is inappropriate does not mean the GAL's services can be terminated.

This thread is also a year old.

babysaver
Jan 30, 2010, 12:21 PM
I am sorry. I meant to say if he wasn't advocating appropriately. I am new to this and actually do appreciate the reminders about posting to things that are old. Unfortunately I will make mistakes since I am not perfect.