Well I know this is different than most but my situation is that I met a guy on my job and he was pursuing me rather hard. But at the time I was playing hard to get, he came around all the time but I never gave him any indication that I was feeling him but I was. Just when I was about to tell him that I was feeling him he changed his mind but at the time I didn't know why. But later he told me that he saw his ex girlfriend he dated back in high school and they were feeling each other. But I just got this information a few days ago. So to go back a month ago when he told me that he changed his mind... I tried to explain why I tried to push him off, he said that he still like me, he even went into that I was a distraction from what he was trying to do. (Whatever that was suppose to mean) But anyway he said that he liked me and he knew that if he would be with me, he would want to be with me more so he tried to avoid being around me like that. So of course I knew that there was something more, I asked him if there was someone else and he would tell me no but after asking him over and over again he finally admitted to me that he was talking to someone on the phones. He told me that when he was feeling me, I wasn't feeling him so during the holidays he went to a party with his brother and while at the party he saw his ex from high school (20 years ago) and they hookup and they have been talking on the phone every since (she lives in another state). So one I am upset with myself because I feel that I pushed him to that party, he wanted to be with me for the holidays but I was busy. So I regret not letting him know that I was feeling him. I didn't really leave him with anything to remember me by, he spent the whole month chasing me. I really do like this guy and would love the opportunity of a second chance but not sure if that would happen because we don't have any history or any real time together because his time was just chasing me. But I am also mad at him because he didn't tell me sooner so that I could have tried to move on. I spent a month trying to be with him but the whole time he was telling me that he still liked me, he said that there was no one else and the whole time he was talking to her. Even now he still says that there is no one else they just talk on the phone. But I told him that he give his time to her, his attention is on her because he do talk to her. He doesn't even call me anymore, he want come to see me anymore at my house or at work. We work at the same place but in different buildings and departments so we don't see each other at work. He still say that he likes me but I don't see how when he never calls or come around.

So with that said I wondered if he did still like me and was feeling her to and was just confused but decided to push away from me because I was the one that didn't show him that I was feeling him. I am so confused and don't know what to think. There have even been times that we have kissed (very passionate kisses he would initiate) and through those kisses, it seems as though he was still feeling me but then he would avoid me for days after. I still don't understand this. We would kiss again but then he avoids me. He would tell me that he would come over or come by the office but then he changes his mind and tell me that he doesn't think it would be a good idea. This I don't know how to explain. I find myself thinking about him so much and wanting to talk to him and see but I know that I can't continue to go after him, (I did for a month and he said that he was feeling her so I don't want to be more of a fool). So I decided to stop calling him but it's so hard cause I do want him. He never said to stop calling directly but indirectly he has, because he doesn't answer most of my calls when I called, nor do he returns all my calls and he doesn't really call me. So I decided to backoff. But my question is; Could there ever be a chance that I could get his attention again and he would call me back and even miss me (even though I didn't really give him a reason to miss me because he just chased me)? I am hoping for a second chance to get to know him and to let him know that I was feeling him. So somebody PLEASE let me know what I need to do or not do. Thanks in advance.

Kind of an old post so if you are still in this situation, back off, if he breaks up with her go for it but don't try to break them up

Amazing you weren't feeling it when you had a chance and what's more amazing is your mad at him for going after his other options and opportunities.

Strange how life works out as your ready now and he isn't.

Move beyond this experience.

(I know this is an older post, but not old enough to close.)

Sounds like both of you like the cat and mouse game of chase more than you like being in love. I would at least think about this as a possibility.