jewels625
Feb 6, 2009, 11:00 AM
I left my ex almost a year ago after 12 yrs/marriage 14 together. Good guy but more into financial support of marriage than emotional/spiritual side and going nowhere. We were married in his church and I thought I had a spiritual partner but it became evident after the marriage tha this was not the case. Because he was a good person I have tried to make it work but it just hasn't. We have agreed on everything and I agreed to settle for MUCH less than half. He keeps the house, most the furniture, 401K, etc. I was to have our son, decide where to live, small amount of child support, which I'm not getting as of yet, my vehicle. He even said he knew I might move away one day and we would work that out and have our son visit him in the summer & holidays. I just wanted my son and to be done with the marriage, not so much about money. If I would have gone for half he said he would get ugly so I settled.
The lawyer sat on the divorce papers and everything was fine until I told him I planned on moving soon. The papers came and he put in that HE should have the exclusive right to decide where my son lives, not me as agreed. We have both moved on since I left and I met someone that is the love of my life and we have talked about marriage. The thorn is that he is out of state and he had thought he would come here if my ex fought the move. The next thorn came when we found out he had a brain tumor and needed surgery so there isn't a way for him to move for quite some time if that. We don't know how long he has and my ex is basically trying to dictate my life telling me I "should just go on up there and see how things work out and our son can come visit me". He knows I can't leave my son, yet he is saying I can't have my new life either.
The fiancé has met my son and adores him and likewise. He is not a replacement for his Dad in any way but because the ex didn't "expect this to happen so soon" he has gone back on everything we had agreed on. Does anyone have feedback - I know it's a lot to read but I appreciate any help.
The lawyer sat on the divorce papers and everything was fine until I told him I planned on moving soon. The papers came and he put in that HE should have the exclusive right to decide where my son lives, not me as agreed. We have both moved on since I left and I met someone that is the love of my life and we have talked about marriage. The thorn is that he is out of state and he had thought he would come here if my ex fought the move. The next thorn came when we found out he had a brain tumor and needed surgery so there isn't a way for him to move for quite some time if that. We don't know how long he has and my ex is basically trying to dictate my life telling me I "should just go on up there and see how things work out and our son can come visit me". He knows I can't leave my son, yet he is saying I can't have my new life either.
The fiancé has met my son and adores him and likewise. He is not a replacement for his Dad in any way but because the ex didn't "expect this to happen so soon" he has gone back on everything we had agreed on. Does anyone have feedback - I know it's a lot to read but I appreciate any help.