I had been dating my ex for a year and 2 months... :( We fought about meaningless things, the usual stuff why didn't you hangout with me, past mistakes, even me leaving her in the town we grew up in (college). So she missed me a ton... but like I said we fought, during christmas break everything took a turn for the worst I was mad we didn't spend time together, she was mad that I was getting mad, not to mention being jealous... 3 weeks ago I got the its over for now speech... and "lets be friends" I did the texting like crazy and called more than I did when we dated probably altogether. Now I hear she is "talking" with a guy from my town and he plays the sweet guy, but he has a history of getting what he wants ( not rape) but yeah. I realized when it was over that I missed her more than what I thought. I would like another chance with her if you have ANY advice I would love to hear it. Btw we have gone our separate ways and seeing if not talking will fix anything.

Before I offer any advice, I would highly suggest looking up previous threads titled "Can/How/Will I get my ex back?" or some variation of the above mentioned words.

I just feel like I am regurgitating my own words sometimes. I also want to ask, do you really just want her back now because you heard she is talking with another guy?

Before I offer any advice, I would highly suggest looking up previous threads titled "Can/How/Will I get my ex back?" or some variation of the above mentioned words.

I just feel like I am regurgitating my own words sometimes. I also want to ask, do you realy just want her back now because you heard she is talking with another guy?

No, I wanted her back before I heard that... I have been thinking about how much she means to me and what not, but I don't know if she is thinking about me. I feel like there is a reason why we were together and now that she's gone... and I see how stupid I was I just need help on the steps I should take to show her I am changing and I am the guy for her. Does that help?

The problem you have is she knew this relationship was over months ago. Women hold onto a guy until the holidays are over and then get rid of him. Women start the new year fresh and she has done that.

Furthermore you can't ever win her or anyone else over because you not at point where you are comfortable with yourself. You have work on your own issues and bring you confidence up, because right now your grasping at straws.

Strictly No Contact with her at all!!

Look these are only experiences but might help...

I recently got back with my ex, I still love her and wanted to make it work but it didn't. HUGELY SUPRISINGLY! lol

I went back and we had a great couple of weeks... then the fights started again, the mistrust, the hurt and all the rest of the less than enjoyable feelings that caused the break up to begin with.

I would not recommend it, to say the least.

The problem you have is she knew this relationship was over months ago. Women hold onto a guy until the holidays are over and then get rid of him. Women start the new year fresh and she has done that.

Furthermore you can't ever win her or anyone else over because you not at point where you are comfortable with yourself. You have work on your own issues and bring you confidence up, because right now your grasping at straws.

That is so true your right. I have been going about this the wrong way thanks. But will she want me back, or will she see this guy is better than me or what? I'll move on if need be but we just stopped talking completely this week so... is the book closed or not yet is there still a chance?

Strictly No Contact with her at all!!!!!

There is no contact as of earlier this Monday so I am already there, will she miss me?

Look these are only experiences but might help...

I recently got back with my ex, I still love her and wanted to make it work but it didn't. HUGELY SUPRISINGLY! lol

I went back and we had a great couple of weeks......then the fights started again, the mistrust, the hurt and all the rest of the less than enjoyable feelings that caused the break up to begin with.

I would not recommend it, to say the least.

That sux man and I understand the advice... But as you tried to make it work and it didn't, I have to try and know for myself and try to get another chance, how did you get another chance anyway.

yeah I have to say, I've also had a relationship where we broke up and got back together (okay we were extreme and did this about three times) first couple of weeks are great... but then the fighting starts back up...

why?

This is my theory (lol of course I can be wong!)

Two people who have a history can't start a fresh, not really, even if both parts say: hey lets start all over again and forget the past! The past doesn't go anywhere, its just there... and evey piece of it is a part of you somehow.

As for marks remark. Yeah it is true I'm afraid, at least for me, I have broken up with both my x bfs, and when I did, I was emotionally ready to let go.at least partly (in my case, I was the only one who tried both times to make the relationship work, and in the end I had to realize in case no.1 it wasn't going to, in case 2 it wasn't going to and it worth it!)

That sux man and I understand the advice... But as you tried to make it work and it didn't, I have to try and know for myself and try to get another chance, how did you get another chance anyways.

Eh to begin, I'm a bi woman, so the man comment... :) cheers! Lol no only joking

I didn't GET another chance, me and my ex decided that we both thought we might be able to make it work. If she doesn't feel that way then there is nothing you can do.

You can try, but you will end up more hurt and have to start the healing process all over again.

Ha cheers!!

Do you want to put your faith into an unsure thing or search for it anew? This is the time for no contact.

yeah i have to say, i've also had a relationship where we broke up and got back together (okay we were extreme and did this about three times) first couple of weeks are great... but then the fighting starts back up....

why?

This is my theory (lol of course I can be wong!)

Two ppl who have a history can't start a fresh, not really, even if both parts say: hey lets start all over again and forget the past! The past doesn't go anywhere, its just there... and evey piece of it is a part of you somehow.

As for marks remark. yeah it is true i'm afraid, at least for me, I have broken up with both my x bfs, and when i did, i was emotionally ready to let go.at least partly (in my case, I was the only one who tried both times to make the realtionship work, and in the end i had to realize in case no.1 it wasn't going to, in case 2 it wasn't going to and it worth it!)

Also a very good point, a little more info on the situation is, she told me that maybe on down the road we can be together but not now because she needs space. I have heard if I give her space she "will miss me" we dated for a year and she has always said before anyway she misses me and when the last time we talked last week it was still I miss you so I don't know. She has talked about this guy she is going to the dance with and how he is touchy and she doesn't like touchy guys but he's a good guy she says but he is also a guy if you date him he will "do stuff with you". So does she miss me and is she thinking about me while we are apart... and how long do I wait to talk to her... 3 weeks a month... The reason I know its not closed yet is because she hasn't let me go she said a little... any more advice friends I REALLY need it.

Do you wanna put your faith into an unsure thing or search for it anew? This is the time for no contact.

Well of course I don't want to put my faith in a unsure thing, but I will take a chance on taking the right steps to try and be better and work things out... I have thought hard about this and all my relationships before I had a 2 year fling with this girl and I knew I needed to move on even if I liked her still and I did and I dated another girl for 8 months and she got crazy and moved on to my now ex... and this time it feels diff not because we dated longer but because as lame as this sounds we both NEVER closed the door we said the normal I'll cya around, I need space even if its meant to be lets see with separation, but there was no for sure WE ARE DONE.

Ceddie,

What does she want?

ceddie,

what does she want?

She wants, me to give her time... she has told me I'll be fine without her... and it would make it easier for her ( to basically move on) if I did first. But most of all I think she wants me to trust her with what she's doing now ( like with the not talking and what not) because I never could go along with it I was afraid if I did she would like someone else and forget about me. Did I mention she's a senior in high school and I'm a freshman in college and we were 3 hrs from each other.

Ok, this may be hard to hear but she's done.

She doesn't want a relationship, she wants time and space to MOVE ON!

Ya, I'm sure she'd love if you moved on first (removes guilt) and then support her too. (all the emotional benefits of a boyfriend with you plus anyone else she feels like!! )

I'm sorry dude but its time to pick yourself up and move on

Dude, she doesn't want drama from you right now. In other words, she doesn't want you in her life. She's telling you to get over her subtly, but she's telling you nonetheless. Move on and move out; she's not coming back. She's found something new but doesn't want to hurt you. Why not let her live her life without a burden from you?

Dude, she doesn't want drama from you right now. In other words, she doesn't want you in her life. She's telling you to get over her subtly, but she's telling you nonetheless. Move on and move out; she's not coming back. She's found something new but doesn't want to hurt you. Why not let her live her life without a burden from you?

All right yeah it was hard to hear... I guess she is done and has moved on. I guess that answers the missing me question, and the if there is a chance of getting another chance question. I guess I have caused drama, thanks for the help any other advice or steps to move on?

Hey I need a little advice, me and my ex did the basic split for the first time with no talking this Monday and haven't talked since. She is going with this guy to the school dance and before we stopped talking of course I made the why you going with him and just over christmas break you said he was annoying and touchy. He has been asking me every time my status with her changed what's with you two I wouldn't tell details to him because I'm not that type of person. But I never knew why he kept asking... well I hear they are always walking in the hall together and she said before how he said he will be there if she ever needs to talk and when I talked to my friend ( female) about the guy because she had some flings and cheated on her boyfriend while he was at west point with this guy. She told me that, everything I was telling her, are the same things he said to her and since she droped him nov in the doing stuff with him while she is dating my friend that he doesn't try to talk to her any more. But my ex doesn't see this. He started macking a lot more when we stopped being official and now he has her going to the dance with him and she agreed to hanging with him AFTER the dance. Besides will she ever come back to me or find me the better guy for her( she never said it was over) for GOOD just I need time. So will my fear of them doing whatever happen or will she see him for who he really is? I need advice ALL DAY because the dance is tomorrow and I'm getting nervous.

I need time,is a nice way of blowing someone off.She is trying not to hurt your feelings.If this guy is a player,that is for her to find out on her own.If she is old enough to date,she is old enough to accept responsibility for her mistakes.

I need time,is a nice way of blowing someone off.She is trying not to hurt your feelings.If this guy is a player,that is for her to find out on her own.If she is old enough to date,she is old enough to accept responsibility for her mistakes.

Yeah I've def used it before, I know we all say this and I could be in denial but, I just feel like since I'm long distance and that guy said all the right things when we were having a bad time that maybe that's why she is moving on. NOT because she likes him but because he is comforting her while we fought. Also your right she will learn from the mistake, but I got to know is there a way to fix me and her, and if she does see this guy for what he is will be come back or what?

Give her the cold shoulder and see her reaction - do not be there for her.

Read my thread and you will see what 'I need time and space' really means.

Give her the cold shoulder and see her reaction - do not be there for her.

Read my thread and you will see what 'I need time and space' really means.

Ok will do, we haven't talked for 4 days I have this txt ready saying hey just saying hey even though we aren't talking. Jw if we could talk sometime not now but whenever your ready maybe about the weather. Is that BAD or is that a OK txt.

If I were you I really wouldn't text her - she is going to a dance with this guy after telling you she didn't like him.. doesn't that make you angry? - use that to help you not text and not reply when she does and then reply after an hour etc - just don't be as available but at the same time you can't do this with the hope that something will start up again.

Just don't talk to her, don't be rude or cold but just give her the impression you are fine because to be honest nothing is the end of the world but the end of the world - everything else we always find a way to live with.

Dude, she is being really nice about this break up, and has moved on to enjoy herself.

Don't text or contact her in any way, and move on with your life.

Its so over, now accept it, and save your dignity some humiliation, and your ego some misery, and pain. Leave her alone and delete the text!!!

Sadly your right the text was dumb, and she was nice about the break up. I guess its SUPER hard to let go I mean a year and 2 months done in 3 weeks even though up until last weekend I got the I miss you and flirty texts. Its time to face it I guess. Anyone want to explain why players like that guy get what they want and leave us good guys out in the cold or girls?

Sadly your right the txt was dumb, and she was nice about the break up. I guess its SUPER hard to let go I mean a year and 2 months done in 3 weeks even though up until last weekend I got the i miss you and flirty txts. its time to face it I guess. anyone wanna explain why players like that guy get what they want and leave us good guys out in the cold or girls?

Only with a mentality like that, will this be true. Your emotions are clouding your judgement right now. Please, don't think like that... believe me, it isn't true.

Carry on... :cool:

Well this guy is and heck I got the lets not mess around speech and That's all that guy wants to do. Right now mentally I am not great because I have to face the fact its over, not another chance or anything. She's really over me wow.

well this guy is and heck I got the lets not mess around speech and THATS all that guy wants to do. right now mentally I am not great because I have to face the fact its over, not another chance or anything. Shes really over me wow.

It's a hard pill to swallow, I know. Eventually, you will bounce back, and not have the loser's mentality that is haunting you right now. You are a good guy, and good guys win, period! I know it sucks to go through this now, but it makes you such a better person in the end. EVERYONE MUST experience heartbreak at least once in their life. Better to get it over with now.

I guess its hard to believe she threw away, our relationship, our friendship, and heck basically anything we had for a guy she really BARELY knows. I miss her a ton, rite now NC is what I'm doing, heck I have been to the heart broken stage with a ex and chasing that girl for 2 years was ROUGH, but then my now ex came and it was great and she isn't the type to get over something SUPER fast especially this but everything isn't making sense, I will move on I just need answers.

I guess its hard to believe she threw away, our realtionship, our friendship, and heck basically anything we had for a guy she really BARELY knows. I miss her a ton, rite now NC is what i'm doing, heck I have been to the heart broken stage with a ex and chasing that girl for 2 years was ROUGH, but then my now ex came and it was great and she isn't the type to get over something SUPER fast especially this but everything isn't making sense, I will move on I just need answers.

well, personally I believe that every person in your life: good or bad, is a gift... an opportunity to learn, love, make mistakes, fall down, get back up and grow. And sadly, sometimes we don't get answers! No matter how hard that is to swallow. Its just the way it is. And its painful and it can be sad.

I totally sympathies with the thoughts that you have now, how she threw it all away, B/c that is basically what she did!

DId you chase your x girlfriend for 2 years after it was over? Did I understand that correctly?

maybe its time to learn from that! And not put yourself through the same strain as you did back then. To go around for 2 years, chasing a love that's dead and gone is a LONG time to be doing that. This time you have the opportunity to start the healing at an earlier stage...

Hay Ceddie,They say nice guys finish last and when it comes to many young girls I think this is true.My eldest son is one of those nice respectful polite guys and he had been dumped on for real losers before.On the other hand my youngest who has a devil may care attitude has girls flocking to him so go figure.
I think they think they can rehabilitate them or something.I don't get the mindset but I know it happens.They like the bad boys.Don't let that make you be something you are not.Some nice girl will appreciate you ,stay cool and be yourself!

What artlady says is so true! There are girls/women out there who appreciates the qualities that you have. And you will find someone like that, lol usually when you're not looking.

Yeah someone will and that's going to be great. I just feel upset which I know is common and I need to move on and be happy, but right now it sux way too much and on top of that I lost my best friend. I knew my other relationships were over at certain times my 2 year thing she kept me along and I moved on when I was ready, same thing with my second to last girlfriend I saw it was more of a your cheating on me which I wasn't thing and BAM I knew it was over. But this no matter how much we fought, and we both wanted to be together, it would get better then something usually with other people we never fought with each other like its your fault people always got in the middle and we would fight about that. If its truly over with no chance of fixing anything and this guy and her date ( which they aren't) for however long heck they could get married then I will move on. Its been REALLY 4 days of NC, and we have flirted text for a long time even before the separate ways thing. She's def not the type to string me along nore lie to me, but if it was OVER she would have told me, and also if she was done and thought we weren't she would have just said we aren't I'm sorry I like someone else like I asked. I may never get my answers and that's fine, but right now I'm on what if's and those SUCk so if I get a shot and I fail then I fail but if I don't for awhile I will wonder what if. I don't know what to do besides NC and of course move on.

You are still stuck on Fantasy Island. When I throw you the rope, hang tight, so we can get out of there man!

OK, I'll hang tight

NC is always hard at first, YES! Hang tight! And grab a hold of KC's rope! You can get through this!

Oh I will

So today my friends mom dies from cancer, so its been a rough day and my ex texts me saying did I know and I say yeah and I'm coming home for the funeral w/e it is. Then she says aww I feel bad (about the death) and I am hurting and she's the closest person I had so I asked if I could call, and she dogs me and asks why and I said because I need someone to talk to and she says she's to busy with getting ready for the dance and stuff so maybe another time. This I tell you was at 1:30 or so and the dance starts at 8 but. Does this mean she is annoyed with me, was she really TOO busy and, also was she REALLY sorry?

NC NC NC NC!!

Stop your killing me man! Stop doing this to yourself.

Does this mean she is annoyed with me, was she really TOO busy and, also was she REALLY sorry?
It means find another shoulder to cry on as she has a party to go to. Take the hint and disappear from her life.

Sorry for your loss.

All right, its been so hard you know.

alright, its been so hard ya kno.

Of course its hard but you have to do it to protect yourself, don't let yourself get hurt you might be already but don't let yourself keep getting hurt. You will find someone that loves you and appreciates you.

alright, its been so hard ya kno.

Ceddie,

You seem like a nice guy so I feel kind of bad for saying this but COME ON!!!

You don't even know this girl! She was quite clear from the start that she wasn't interested in a relationship with you. And you just kept on following her around!!

Strap on a pair and get over it! IT IS A CRUSH

alright, its been so hard ya kno.

As a fellow nice guy I know it is hard. But what is worse then not getting the girl you want, is getting the girl and being used by her. Nothing sucks worse then when you give your all to a girl and she gives nothing in return and then leaves you, and you realize you gave everything and she gave nothing. Sometimes you just have to stop and say, I give a damn ABOUT MYSELF, too much to let this woman use me, even if that means I'm going to go it alone.

Ceddie,

I would start running I were you, and don't ever look back. You are way too good for that. You get setting yourself up just to get shot down again. The more you do this, one day you will not get back up.

Let it go, and stop talking to her. I can see that its pretty much impossible for you so what I would suggest is deleting her number from your phone, email from your inbox, profile from your Facebook and just get away from her and YOURSELF. You are drowning in your own tears man!

I hate to see people like this so please please, MAN UP like all of us have had to and just like you will have to - you just seem to prolong this when you can start moving on NOW.

Willpower my man, all about your willingness to do YOURSELF RIGHT - start living for yourself nobody else

So I haven't updated in awhile I've been trying to figure things out and do whatever to keep my mind off her. I recommend the movie cash back as a good movie, but basically we started talking again feb 8th and it was nice she told me randomly she didn't like this other guy and the basic stuff and how her time with him at the dance was so so. She asks me what I think and I tell her what I heard but I kept it NON jealous because I wasn't because it was def akward. That whole next 4 days were us talking like nothing had happened then I saw the trap and fell for it I saw she was giving me signs of we could fix things eventually and I fell for it and said can we get back to how we were. Ha ha I know DUMB but that ruined the bridge I just remade she then cuts me off and says we shouldn't talk, and she was giving me back my class ring. I got it back and on v-day none the less and she was with another guy when she drove up, ( ironically) it was the guy she couldn't stand. She tells my friend she doesn't know if its over 4 ever but then I txted and called trying to figure what the heck happened BIG MISTAKE again. We talk for a hour on my way back to school about how she was hurt about how I acted and how us dating was a mistake ( a year and 2 months) , and worst of all she was working me in her "schedule" she said and then tells me how next here she might move to a juco to play softball. All the things I wanted to talk about and she throws them on me NOW, so I took her advice again and am back to NC. Its easier this time and I deleted my profile on myspace so no more temptation there, after that mon she changed me off her top friends and said on her title page "lifes to short so i'm moving on". It hurts but I understand I didn't wait and now she's gone and I am happy for her, so its been 2 weeks of NC. ANYONE want to explain how the heck she changed her view on me in 3 days I mean until that thurs we were GREAT then BAM. She said it was to hard to go back and how she thinks its best we stay away from each other even though she doesn't want to.

I know I was dumb and I'm doing nc FULLY, so I'm asking a interpretation on what she meant. Is she pushing me away because she still likes me and doesn't want to, or did I just kill my hope of being anything any advice!!

She has been gone since your first post. The rest was false hope until the last post.

Sorry for your loss, but there will be others.

Thanks, yeah there will be I feel good about all of this thanks for the advice def.

She is maybe with that other guy and that's fine and what not. I am also happy for her because this break up made me grow up and what not which is what I needed. From our last conversation I think she's hurting still even though she says she's not just by how she was acting. I'm not reading into it and I made a promise that I needed to change for me not her and I am, I have been working out again and praying more and everything is coming together even without her. I do wish I would have used NC when she asked me to before but I cracked now I see how being needy is DUMB and I never want to be that guy again!

Threads merged/and edited for chat speat or text chat, whatever!!!!!!!


Hello all, my ex and me did NC for two weeks and this was the second time we have tried this. I have gained control of my neediness and just wanted to say hi that's all, I left the call neutral and said I don't expect you to call back... I mean I didn't and I for once was fine and didn't care I felt good. Then she calls and is cold at first, she asks me the normal questions why did you call, can't u talk to someone else... but here is where it gets CONFUSING. I had told my because who goes to school with her I was hanging with another girl that weekend just to see where things could go ( didn't like the girl) and she told her friends and ironically my ex over heard. So she tells me that yeah your because told me you were happy and hanging with another girl so why do you want to talk to me... it sounded like she was jealous... she was the one who was hanging all over another guy and she put I'm moving on her myspace. So we stop talking on the phone and she texts me saying why do you want to talk to me now again ( its weird because she said she wanted ME to leave her alone) so I tell her why, and she leaves off saying "tell the girl or whoever your dating that its to hard for me and I make it hard for myself without anyone else". I think she meant talking to me is hard and she can do it alone but I don't know. I have heard the countless move on advice, and have done it I mean I've got my life under control but I want to know does she miss me, is she jealous, and is it OVER still. Oh by the way when I said we haven't talked in 2 weeks she said is THAT ALL, did she miss me or what? Any interpretation is helpful.

You broke NC, and now your confused or curious, but whatever she means is irrelevant, since you started this mess all over again.

True, I guess I didn't listen. I guess its back to the old drawing board

Threads merged

Its been at least a month since I updated my situation. I would love to tell you all that its great and I met this wonderful girl and we are getting serious... but that's so far from the truth. She has been give me weird signals like when I ask do you miss me or since she got a boyfriend now I asked are you happier without me she asked why do I care. She either avoids the question or flips it to me... I mean I've thought maybe she is over me but this new guy came in the picture when we stopped talking for like 3 weeks and before this guy even came up she tried to make me jealous with this other guy who she said was like her brother. But the funny thing about that was she went through a billion and one questions when I asked if she liked him like why do you want to know, why do you care, etc. She's def not holding anything back she def isn't being super nice so avoiding the truth when I ask her stuff isn't really her style because why hold back yes I'm happier with out you when she's already being honest. Oh and explain this to me why do women care about who you date or like when they broke up with you and then on top of that they bring it up.. but when its role reversal they blow up like you asked them there weight ( sorry if that affends anyone) its just ridiculous. I mean I still love her and care about her, but I'm better now I mean I'm getting out there getting my confidence back and what not I just would like to be friends or at least cool. But she doesn't and that's fine I just want her to be honest with herself about how she feels like she def doesn't like this guy enough to date because obviously she's not answering easy questions so I don't know. One last thing... this might sound crazy so bare with me. I have been praying that god softens her heart and brings her back to me, but if I was meant to take her abuse to have a chance later then I would because that would be his will not mine. Well I asked for a dream about her, well I have the dream about her well ironically I displace it because its crazy because you can dream what you want sometimes, but the story gets real weird ( I'm a youth ministry major) so I was in a bible class and my professor was like dreams are real, don't displace there meaning for gods will for your life. I need help friends, I know the NC rule which its basically still in affect because we really don't talk but I need to know your take on how she's acting etc. This isn't at the moment about getting her back because I need my foot in the door first. I just want to know is this guy a pro or a joe or if she even has a inch of feelings.

What are you trying to do? She has a boyfriend. I just your old thread and it seems like you have a history of breaking the no contact rules. If you keep breaking the rules you're never going to get over her.

But it seems like you don't want to let her go. What are you expecting? Do you really think that she will break up with her boyfriend, go back with you and live happily ever after?

Quit putting yourself through so much grief. She's completely messed up your mind. You have to abide by the no contact rules or else you're just prolonging the suffering and continuing to live in fantasy land.

Honestly all I'm trying to do is be cool, I mean fighting with ANYONE dating, liking or whatever isn't my style. I know not everyone is going to like me and all that jazz but I guess that's why I try and continue to try. I mean I'm not the type of guy to break people up because I wouldn't want someone to do that to me either you know but I guess that's what it looks like... she's not going to break up with him and date me again, that thought never crossed my mind I guess all I want is to be in her life rather than out. Yeah she has messed my mind up but I'm allowing it so its more my fault, its like no matter how much I try to find that new girl or what ever its like my mind doesn't comprehend the change I don't know. Maybe its denial that I'm living in then she does something strange that makes me wonder.

Games, games, games. Your both are playing them with each other. You need to stop it and move on and stop living on false hope. She got someone so maybe you should do the same and keep her out of your life.

Dreams are just dreams, nothing more. Last night I dream I won a million bucks so what your saying I am going win a million bucks? Don't read so much into your dreams.

Move on and let her go and stop toying with one another. She owes you nothing and neither do you.

You can't force someone to be your friend if they don't want to. The two of you are still letting emotions get the best of you.

The reason people told you to go no contact is because you guys are still deeply affected by the breakup. Until you have recovered and can think more objective, it's not time to try to be friends again.

Your all right, I have been letting my emotions get the best of me. I guess I thought by going on some dates, making out with other girls... that maybe just maybe it would make me forget her. But it hit me that I wished it was her, I guess in all honesty I have been playing games not to win her back because I'm to old for that craziness. See NC has worked in all the ways I've heard I mean I have confidence in myself again, I have caught some beautiful ladies eye. I mean I could move on at anytime but like we all find or found out it has to be oUR decision. I've learned a lot since I started my first blog, mainly that I have friends who have been or are in the same situation. But even more important that even though we may never see each other on the street or have lunch we all have a story. I know I haven't been the easiest person, I guess none of us are( trial and error). Just wanted to say thanks to all.