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Deegers14
Feb 3, 2009, 12:45 PM
Ok here's the story. I have been with my girlfriend for over two years now. We are both 21 and I am out of college she is still in. Things were going great up until the last month and a half or so. She has a lot of depression right now with things that have been in her past. She found out that her dad she's known all her life isn't her biological dad, but never knew until she was 19. Her mother still lies to her about it. Her ex boyfriend gave her HPV whenever he cheated on her and never told her until one day she found out on her own when she has the signs of it and went to the doctor. So all of these problems have always been there and I have been aware of them since we got together. We generally are very happy together and with each other and things are good. She is also depressed because she changed majors in college and has to stay and extra year and a half and is extremely busy in school right now.. Recently she told me that she wants to temporarily break up so she can get back to being herself and get some of the stressful things off her mind. She has agreed to let me help her find a therapist for her depression and everything.

She says she just needs a little time to herself and assures me that she isn't doing this just to be single and that she really does love me and wants us to get back together when she figures things out. She says she doesn't want to take too long to figure things out because she doesn't want me to get tired of waiting for her to make up her mind but she doesn't want to rush anything.

I honestly think that she is the perfect girl for me and I want to do anything I can to keep a future for us but more importantly I want her to be happy and become the person she used to be. Has anyone had any experiences like this? Should I be concern that we won't get back together when she figures stuff out? And what should I do as far as acting and support for her to help her? Thanks in advance

roxypox
Feb 3, 2009, 01:01 PM
Helping her find a therapist for the depression is a great way of showing her that you are there.

With all that emotional and physical stress, no wonder she's depressed, poor girl she really seem to have a lot on her plate right now. If she wants space, give it to her.

I've dealt w depressions myself, and I was also the type who needed space and time to myself.

As for the two of you as a couple, just tell her that you love her, that you're there if she needs you and that you will give her the space that she needs.

The only person who knows the answer to whether this is a break to figure out if you should remain a couple is her, so if she says its not about that then I guess you just have to take a leap of faith and trust her.

liz28
Feb 3, 2009, 05:08 PM
I think your girlfriend has a lot on her plate and her mind is every which way and very clouded. The only thing you can do is respect her space. Let her sort things out.

Counselling right now will help her and something she should look into as Roxy has mention.