I feel like I no longer exsist
Like if I am in a dream
I can even go outside anymore
Its messing up my life.
What can I do?

You need to see your GP hun and they will be able to help you. You really need help and support during this time have you family - friendsyou can confide in?

You do need professional help, but in the short term it may help to understand that depression, etc. are selfish ailments; and one way to counteract them is to help others, volunteer, or simply do things for others unconditionally in your family, especially if it can help you in the process.

Offer to go to run an errand for someone, it may get you out of the house; but you will be doing it out a sense of duty or caring for the other person.

Call a friend that is in need and listen rather than talk about what ails you, and try to help them.

The idea of course is to get out of self. I know if you think about any of the things I suggested you can already sense that your mood would be lifted if you did things for others.

So take one small step and offer your help, your compassion, your empathy to someone else and resist the temptation to tell them how you are feeling.

Is that to say you don't need to talk this out with someone, a friend, or a professional, no that's not what I'm saying. You do need to take the time to talk with someone else, but when you aren't talking about you; then get to get out of your own head, engage with helping others. Heck it could be the unselfish act of taking the dog for a walk for the good of the dog; but something that allows you to stop thinking about your cares and concentrate on the needs of others.

"Most people are as happy as they make up their minds to be"

You can make your mind happy. In some cases it's simply a choice. Reject all the negative messages and replace them with positive affirmations about yourself, over time they will come as naturally as your negative thoughts, but it takes practice and willingness.

Write down on a piece of paper each day 5 things you are grateful for whether you 'feel' grateful or not. Do this for 3 weeks and I guarantee you your thinking will change, if it doesn't I will refund your misery.

You need to take simply action to change the habits of your thinking. Small steps, but steps just the same.

Good luck to you, I know you can do it; or you wouldn't be here.

I'm bipolar have bin for ten years, when I hit my lows, similar you what you are experiencing now, I'd stop doing anything except sleep, eat maybe once every couple days, and cry but not really, more like sob. I'd stair at nothing inparticular for hours and my eyes would water. I felt so alone, beside myself, illusive "like i was in a dream" and nothing was real not even me.

Yes depression is rather selfish, but that's not your fault. Your feelings inside you are not consistent with the things happening in your life, or maybe they are, but you can't get by them to continue living. Anxiety, depression, Mania, and various other things are difficult to contend with. Some believe you can simply change your thoughts, how you think, and you'll get better. This only works if you are in a milder form of these, because if you try to "think positive" you will constantly fail at first, due to your illness. If it's mild you are able to catch yourself before the negative thoughts start to "wire" into your brain. Once they are wired, some can over come them but few indeed, into your brain you will need the aid of medications to help change your thinking.

Yes medications can be bad, but they can be good. My Psychiatrist only diagnosed me this last September, and she found some meds that worked for me. Lithium, dexadrine, welbutrine. There was a long process of trial and error, since we don't really know why people are depressed(Nuero-medically speeking); we have to try things see what helps, has the least side effects and go from there. Every path has a bump on it, so it won't be easy, but it is something to keep you "alive/real/present/mindful". Trust your counseler, psychiatrist{Knows about medications and how they effect your brain/behaviour.}(if you get one.), Psychologist(theorapy, talking, groups, etc.) .

(side note: For ten years they said I was depressed, that was false. I am Both Depressed &Manic. Manic is like supper happy energenic, talkative, and jittery. SO when I took the anti-depressent, I'd go on a high, because I'd have the med feeding me happy and the Manic stage feeding me happy. Let me tell you that's way too much happy. Any way, the seritonine in my brain would simply run out, so I had none, thenI'd crash so bad that I'd want to die. Ten years it took to find my way out, but now that I'm out, I'm going to live.)

My suggestion, go to the Counseler/ Dr. (they usually referred me to a counseler to be looked over. Unless you go straigh to emerg, tell them you are totally freeking out and need to be tested for depression, anxiety, If you find you do get super happy spells mania, and what ever you think is needed.) Try to get into a Psychologist, or psychiatrist - they will have a better idea what you may need.

From there take your meds, becarful if your GP decides to perscribe meds with out getting you to talk to a Psych, or a Psych. Gp's have a general idea, but that's not always good. You can take the meds they perscribe for you, but if you find that you are expierencing a lot of heavy symptoms, go straight to the Emerg.

Next, regular counsleing sessions to help focus on what you can do to help yourself. After all, this is a selfish ailment. Try not to give up, there is always hope, let the people you love and care about, and that will help you about your ordeal. There are tons of books and groups that can give you info to help them understand.

One step at a time, go talk to some one who can help you understand your situation. "Knowlege maybe power, and power maybe freedom, but freedom comes with responsibility."- as far as I know, I did take some one else's Idea but I changed it into something new. (ME)

I'm not sure what you may have but in the ways of depression I've got a bit of understanding, from various perspectives. Feel free to ask any thing you think may be of interest to you. I have many books as well. I'm not sure what more to say, but, take care, and remember what Yoda said to Luke when he used the force to bring Luke's X-wing out of the marsh?

luke: "I don't believe it?!"
Yoda: "that is why you fail."

peace be with you.

You do need professional help, but in the short term it may help to understand that depression, etc. are selfish ailments; and one way to counteract them is to help others, volunteer, or simply do things for others unconditionally in your family, especially if it can help you in the process.

Offer to go to run an errand for someone, it may get you out of the house; but you will be doing it out a sense of duty or caring for the other person.

Call a friend that is in need and listen rather than talk about what ails you, and try to help them.

The idea of course is to get out of self. I know if you think about any of the things I suggested you can already sense that your mood would be lifted if you did things for others.

So take one small step and offer your help, your compassion, your empathy to someone else and resist the temptation to tell them how you are feeling.

Is that to say you don't need to talk this out with someone, a friend, or a professional, no that's not what I'm saying. You do need to take the time to talk with someone else, but when you aren't talking about you; then get to get out of your own head, engage with helping others. Heck it could be the unselfish act of taking the dog for a walk for the good of the dog; but something that allows you to stop thinking about your cares and concentrate on the needs of others.

"Most people are as happy as they make up their minds to be"

You can make your mind happy. In some cases it's simply a choice. Reject all the negative messages and replace them with positive affirmations about yourself, over time they will come as naturally as your negative thoughts, but it takes practice and willingness.

Write down on a piece of paper each day 5 things you are grateful for whether you 'feel' grateful or not. Do this for 3 weeks and I guarantee you your thinking will change, if it doesn't I will refund your misery.

You need to take simply action to change the habits of your thinking. Small steps, but steps just the same.

Good luck to you, I know you can do it; or you wouldn't be here.

Though I understand this is a means to acquiring the state of mind that is "happiness", I would be cautious to exercis it. Because it is risky.

If the OP goes to help others, what happens when the OP forgets to help themselves? Or worse, what happens when the OP has no one to help, they are a lone and have nothing but fear to accompany them?

Yes, for many years I tried to help others, still do though in a different way. I lost myself and gave everything to anyone who would ask it of me. That was not healthy, for I needed to respect my needs/ myself. Self affrimations may work better later on, when one is feeling like there is a stronger connection to hope. My feelings were hollow, and empty. I would try to help others, to fill a need that you just can't fill like that. Love and belonging is important, but since I felt I was always different, I would not care to be around others. I didn't want to upset them with the cinical, dark, angery, afraid, lost, and sad words I seemed to always say. My thoughts I tried to change, but my feelings were not there for me to get anything out of them. I found that with out feeling there is no incentive. You would have to beable to let go of your "Possitive thinking" for a minute, and try to imagine the most horrible feeling you've ever felt, then think why you felt it, then imagine not feeling anything, and not caring about what happened. Just emptyness. If you only look at one side of the equation, you can't see the answer.

Consider the phrase:"You can not help others, unless you help your self first." or as Buddha may say it, "You yourself, as much as any one in the entire universe deserve your love and affection."

One step at a time... Try to keep your mind buisy, but not on doing things for other people. Do things for yourself, because you want to do them, though you do not feel like you do.

Peace and kindness.

P.S. My words are just letters on a page, you have to decide if they are worth considering, more importantly, maybe you have a better idea.

I know how you feel, I still feel that way up to now. I feel like I don't matter anymore, I feel like people don't see and notice me anymore.

I always feel sad when I see people who are happy and enjoying life. I don't know why.

But every time I feel sad like that, I email myself how I feel. It helps a little bit.