View Full Version : My boyfriend
Snow Angel
Jan 26, 2009, 05:45 PM
Hi. I was wondering if anybody could help explain what I can do about my boyfriend. He is the most gorgeous, smartest, lovable man in the world. But he is so stubborn at times I could just scream! Let me give you a little bit of history. We have been together for about two and a half years. The day I laid my eyes on him I knew he was the one! During our time together we had our ups and downs like most couples do. Last year we had a baby together but we had to split up a few months ago because of money problems. We see each other as much as possible, but now he always seems to overthink things. I always ask what he is feeling but he doesn't tell me. He just says nothing is wrong but I know there is. I don't know why he shuts me out anymore and I sometimes wonder if Iam losing him. I love him to death and I don't ever want to live without him. He says he still loves me and all but I can't help wonder if he's just starting to let go! How can I know how he feels if he won't open up to me?
talaniman
Jan 26, 2009, 06:51 PM
Sometimes I wonder why females feel shutout, when a guy has no feelings to share? Are your hormones still raging? Is it possible your freaking him out, for no reason? Relax, tell us what his actions say.
Snow Angel
Jan 26, 2009, 08:15 PM
He gets suddenly quiet for no reason. It's the way he says things, the way he writes me an E-mail, I know when something is bothering him. He's normally full of life and passion. He's not a boring guy at all. I can tell when he's depressed or when something's on his mind, he gets distant like he's not even there! Trust me I've gotten to know him and the way he acts.
And no it's not raging hormones!
talaniman
Jan 27, 2009, 05:46 AM
Then be patient and let him talk in his own time, when he works it out with himself.
neverme
Jan 27, 2009, 06:49 AM
STOP!
Stop looking too far into things. Stop relying on your intuition to tell you what your relationship is or where it is.
Let this "wonderful" man tell you when he is ready. It seems to me you may have some control issues. You did split up, you don't share your lives anymore. But moreover, he is never obliged to share every thought and feeling with you.
Try to be a bit more independent and get on with all that your new life and baby has to offer. There is nothing you can do if he doesn't want to tell you what's going on with him.
Men are more likely to go into 'their cave' so they can find the answer then come out and relate it to the world once they have. If that's what's going on it's just a waiting game.
Snow Angel
Jan 27, 2009, 10:56 AM
So I should just back off and wait till he comes to me. Thanks for the advice guys. But I'm still afraid I might be losing him! I have become independent and I do enjoy our child. I just want to have a family with him. We only split up because of money. We didn't break up. I thought we were going to for a while there but we resolved that problem but it still doesn't seem like he trusts me.
Romefalls19
Jan 27, 2009, 11:07 AM
Yes, wait until he comes to you. I HATE when I get hounded about what is bothering me when I can't wrap my head completely around the problem myself. Sure something's on my mind, but I want to sort it out myself so when I do talk about it, we discuss it the right way.