I'm sure this question could go under the topic of money or even family because it is such a broad topic.

Here's my scenario; My husband and I got married 3 years ago. He has 2 children from a previous marriage; 17 and 14. His ex wife recently moved in with her boyfriend and they are in the final stages of purchasing a home together. My husband has joint custody of the children, but they list their mothers home as their primary residence. We have his youngest probably about 5 days out of the week. His oldest resides primarily at her mothers.

Child support is paid weekly to the exwife, in addition they also split all major expenses i.e sports, school supplies etc. (up until last year his ex would ask for $10 to go towards the $20 she spent on buying easter egg baskets. From time to time she does request reimbursement for non major expenses). The ex claims both children at tax time and she keeps 100% of the return. I would have thought that since they split all major expenses that each of them should be able to claim one child on their taxes? )

We live in NY state and his oldest is looking to go to college in New Hampshire.

Does child support change once she goes away to school?
Should my husband and I file our taxes separately this year?
We want to set things up so that only his income and his ex wife's income are considered when filing for college aid packages.
How does my income as the second wife, and his ex-wife's boyfriend's income come into play?
I know that there is a college credit that parents can claim when their child is in school - who gets to claim that? If they are both contributing to her college education it does not seem fair that his exwife should get to claim the credit herself.

Without obtaining a lawyer, what resources are out there that we can utilize to educate ourselves on all of this?

I'm sure this question could go under the topic of money or even family becuase it is such a broad topic.

Here's my scenario; My husband and i got married 3 years ago. He has 2 children from a previous marriage; 17 and 14. His ex wife recently moved in with her boyfriend and they are in the final stages of purchasing a home together. My husband has joint custody of the children, but they list their mothers home as their primary residence. We have his youngest probably about 5 days out of hte week. His oldest resides primarily at her mothers.

Child support is paid weekly to the exwife, in addition they also split all major expenses i.e sports, school supplies etc. (up until last year his ex would ask for $10 to go towards the $20 she spent on buying easter egg baskets. from time to time she does request reimbursement for non major expenses). The ex claims both children at tax time and she keeps 100% of the return. I would have thought that since they split all major expenses that each of them should be able to claim one child on their taxes??)

We live in NY state and his oldest is looking to go to college in New Hampshire.

Does child support change once she goes away to school?
Should my husband and i file our taxes separately this year?
We want to set things up so that only his income and his ex wifes income are considered when filing for college aid packages.
How does my income as the second wife, and his ex-wife's boyfriend's income come into play?
I know that there is a college credit that parents can claim when their child is in school - who gets to claim that? If they are both contributing to her college education it does not seem fair that his exwife should get to claim the credit herself.

Without obtaining a lawyer, what resources are out there that we can utilize to educate ourselves on all of this?


Child support is according to the Judgment of divorce - probably at least until the child is 21. Take a look at the Judgment.

You'd have to work the figures both ways - joint and individual - in order to determine which is best in your situation.

You can't "set up" your financial status so that total household income is NOT considered while filing for college aid. If you live in that house, your income is considered as contributing to the household.

The above is how the boyfriend's and your income come into play.

As far as credit toward College costs - if it's support you are talking about it's the same thing your husband has been doing. One or the other party claims the child for tax purposes and that should be covered in the Judgment of divorce.

Or are you asking about paying college tuition on top of support?

Thank you for responding.

That's interesting what you said:

You can't "set up" your financial status so that total household income is NOT considered while filing for college aid. If you live in that house, your income is considered as contributing to the household.

I guess I can see how my income has to be considered as contributing to the household but how would the boyfriends income be counted. He is after all simply a live in boyfriend. They would most likely not file taxes together so how would anyone know about his income?

If his daughter goes to college in another state that leaves only his youngest here at home. I'm also wondering if he would have to continue to pay her full child support every week (even though only one child is currently in the household) AND also contribute to a monthly allowance for college expenses etc.

Thank you for responding.

Thats interesting waht you said:

You can't "set up" your financial status so that total household income is NOT considered while filing for college aid. If you live in that house, your income is considered as contributing to the household.

I guess i can see how my income has to be considered as contributing to the household but how would the boyfriends income be counted. He is after all simply a live in boyfriend. They would most likely not file taxes together so how would anyone know about his income?

If his daughter goes to college in another state that leaves only his youngest here at home. I'm also wondering if he would have to continue to pay her full child support every week (even though only one child is currently in the household) AND also contribute to a monthly allowance for college expenses etc.



I haven't seen the applications refer to spousal income - I've only seen "household" income. If he lives there presumably he pays for something (or let's hope so) and that's one less thing the mother has to pay for.

Does the divorce require him to pay monthly support AND something toward College, only support? In every instance I seen the child/student needs a home to come back to and so support continues until full age.

Need to know what the Judgment of Divorce says.

It says that child support should continue until the child is "emancipated" and that both parents will contribute to their college education.

To be frank I worry that either myself or both me and my husband will get the short end of the stick financially. From a non legal standpoint I see that we are married so our income is one. Where as she is buying a house with her boyfriend but I do not know if both names will be on the mortgage. So she gets child support, plus half of all expenses from the children's father... PLUS I would assume that half of all of her living expenses will be covered by her live in boyfriend... Plus claiming both children on her taxes every year. Somehow it seems like she's really making out financially. Don't get me wrong, my husband is an excellent father and would do anything for his children. And I definitely want to be fair - she does deserve some type of financial support. But I do not want to have her taking advantage of the situation while we are struggling to make ends meet.

So I want to get myself and my husband as educated as possible. With everything I've stated in the above paragraph it would seem hardly fair that my husband continues to pay the full monthly child support, pay monthly or annual college payments and now the ex gets to claim both the kids on her taxes and claim the education credits for even more of a return. If they are both contributing to the college educattion I think that they should both be able to benefit from the tax credits/tax returns..

I apologize if my questions aren't completely cut and dry, maybe the problem is that I don't know what questions to ask. The best way to sum it up is how can I prevent my husband, who is a very responsible father.. from getting taken to the cleaners.

it says that child support should continue until the child is "emancipated" and that both parents will contribute to their college education.

To be frank i worry that either myself or both me and my husband will get the short end of the stick financially. From a non legal standpoint i see that we are married so our income is one. Where as she is buying a house with her boyfriend but i do not know if both names will be on the mortgage. So she gets child support, plus half of all expenses from the childrens father.....PLUS I would assume that half of all of her living expenses will be covered by her live in boyfriend...Plus claiming both children on her taxes every year. Somehow it seems like she's really making out financially. Don't get me wrong, my husband is an excellent father and would do anything for his children. And i definately want to be fair - she does deserve some type of financial support. But I do not want to have her taking advantage of the situation while we are struggling to make ends meet.

So i want to get myself and my husband as educated as possible. With everything i've stated in the above paragraph it would seem hardly fair that my husband continues to pay the full monthly child support, pay monthly or annual college payments and now the ex gets to claim both the kids on her taxes and claim the education credits for even more of a return. If they are both contributing to the college educattion i think that they should both be able to benefit from the tax credits/tax returns..

I apologize if my questions aren't completely cut and dry, maybe the problem is that i dont know what questions to ask. The best way to sum it up is how can i prevent my husband, who is a very responsible father..from getting taken to the cleaners.



The only way to get a reduction in child support is to file for a reduction based on changed circumstances. You may very well be in a State where support is by schedule. The Courts simply punches the figures into the formula and out pops the child support figure.

These matters very often don't seem fair to one party or the other - I don't know why at the time of the divorce the parents didn't alternate years when it came to claiming the child or children on tax returns.

The only problem I see with re-opening the child support issue is: your husband hopefully has a better income, more assets, better assets (and I realize this is not always the case) than he had at the of the divorce. Hopefully so does his ex-wife. He also now has your income (in some States). If it's "household" income, so does his ex-wife, if she admits that the boyfriend lives with her.

Your husband could possibly end up paying more than currently ordered, depending on how the financial info lines up. And I've seen it happen!