I love my wife but lately have become obsessed with gay bondage. I look at it every chance I get and get off to it. I don't really desire my wife, but I don't really want a man, I just really get off on the idea of being bound and gagged and forced to submit to a guy, regardless of what it entails. I dream of it at night and have come close to being caught by my wife viewing it and pleasuring myself. I am wondering if I am actually gay but suppressing my homosexual tendencies.

Have you had these feelings prior to this sudden urge?

Have you had these feelings prior to this sudden urge?

Off and on for the past few years yes

Hmmm... have you ever done anything with a guy?

Only been tied up and petted. He tried to give oral and when he started I freaked out and he stopped.

Well, it could just be a fantasy... doesn't necessarily mean you're gay. You said you don't really desire a man, so it may not be what you truly want. Maybe you should get professional help to better understand what it means or where it is coming from.

Thank you

You're welcome! Hopefully you resolve this soon.

Since you fuel your passion for gay bondage by viewing pornography, you may just be conditioning yourself to become what you view... normally, people have feelings for both sexes but are taught to suppress normal feelings by religion and parents.

IN general, I would say that you should stop getting your kicks from porn and try to get in touch with your deep down real and tender feelings, perhaps with a talented therapist. That would make the happiest alternative for you no matter what your real feelings are. :)

Has your sex life become boring?

Yes it has

Yes it has

Then I think that is your answer. You are seeking excitement in what has become predictible dull, boring sex with your wife. You actually seek excitement.. not sex with men. Example... how much different can you get from dull repetitive missionary position sex than gay bondage.

Its going to be hard to get marital sex back on track after if got boring. It needs your wife's attention as well. You can't do it alone. Try it in a different location, try different positions, try it at different times than you usually do it. Anything but the same rut you have been in.

I will discuss with her. Thank you for your attention and thought in assisting me.

Try and take it slow and easy... if you come out of left field with a whole lot of stuff all at once you will cast suspicion on yourself in her eyes. Take it eay, one thing at a time.. find things that you might enjoy as well as her. And keep in mind she might not be receptive to every idea you present. Limit your stuff to things she will entertain. It's a marriage after all, and you do things together.

You cannot TURN gay.. either you are or your not.. and viewing porn will not make you gay.. talk to your wife about it.. maybe she would enjoy safe bondage with you. If it is a man you fantasize about.. then.. well.. you have your answer..

If it bothers you that much stop looking at it. Its not going to do your relationship any good.

Its just a fantasy not reality.

Honey, you don't turn gay. I'm gay... always been gay... haha. Lots of people, especially men, freak out when they let someone of the opposite sex touch them for the first few times. You sex drive battles your mind and what you have been conditioned into believing is right or wrong. I wish you luck sweets!

Hahahaha I meant of the same sex... see told you I was gay hahaha!