I just found out that it is possible for my daughters father to file for legal physical custody of my daughter who he has not seen in 2 and a half years and he is not on her birth certificate (as of yet-his choice)... he was emotionally abusive to me and has never respected her... even terrorized her by putting her toes into a pets cage of ours -and laughing (when she was 2) would he have this right? And what do I need to do before he does something like this? :( :confused: :mad:

I live in California...
We were seeing each other off and on for about 11 years.. he wanted to drive me to the clinic to have an abortion at 6 months along... he was finally removed from my home (he wouldn't leave when I told him) because he was arrested on other charges... (which at the time I "thought" he was going down the right path.. and to my surprise he was not.)

Don't get excited! He has a long way to go before he can get any custody. I suspect he has threatened you with seeking custody but do you really think a judge would just snatch her from you and give her to an ex-con? Relax and get an order for child support!

Don't get excited! He has a long way to go before he can get any custody. I suspect he has threatened you with seeking custody but do you really think a judge would just snatch her from you and give her to an ex-con? Relax and get an order for child support!!

BUT if he goes and files and has the "paperwork" then he has the right to her...

So that is why I am asking... do I need to go file the peperwork to make certain that she stays with me? I haven't done so already because I thought if I did that it would make it easier for him...

You need to talk to a lawyer asap. Not only to allay your fears but to gain comfort in your legal rights. He must have more than just paper work as only a judge can decide custody, and you will have a chance to present your side. He may get visitation but that can be supervised if you prove he is irresponsible. If you feel he is dangerous an order of protection can keep him away from you and your daughter. See a lawyer and for the sake of you and your child stay calm. I feel your concern but you must stay calm.