PDA

View Full Version : Asked out a friend. I think.


bb4
Dec 25, 2008, 11:08 AM
I thought I made it clear but I guess I didn't.

A few days ago, I asked out a friend, or so I thought. I've been friends with this girl for almost a year now. We hang out a lot, but always with other friends around. When I just met her, I asked her out, but it didn't work out since she was dating someone at the time. For the last few months now, I thought I was getting signals from her that she liked me. Her sister and brother in-law are always hinting to me to ask her out. Now that the opportunity came up, I went for it. Here's exactly what I said to her: asked if she was busy Tuesday night, she said no, so I asked "Do you want to go out for dinner?" she said "sure". To me in a way "dinner" in a conversation between a girl and a guy, is kind of a code word for date :) .
Tuesday night dinner didn't happen, she asked to reschedule, then I called her the following day, to talk and make sure the new time/date was good, and she asked me if I wanted to invite someone else.

Does she think we're going out as friends? We've never went out for dinner just the two of us as friends or anything before...
How do I let her know that it's a date, or that I'm interested... without just saying that it's a date and I like her.

rockysmother
Dec 25, 2008, 11:12 AM
I would ask her once more if she would like to go out on a date. Then based upon her response you will know if she is interested in dating you. If she says sure but I'm a little busy at this time of year, then don't give up. If she says I appreciate the invitation but I have someone or something else going on , then I would take that as a sign she is not interested in me and move on to someone else.

talaniman
Dec 25, 2008, 11:30 AM
She asked me if I wanted to invite someone else.


Since I know you answered "No, just us", what did she say?? If she says yes then just have dinner and not be in a hurry to move beyond enjoying each other company. That gives you both a comfort zone to relax.

What is this official date stuff? What's the hurry to define something, and stress about it.

bb4
Dec 25, 2008, 11:34 AM
Since I know you answered "No just us", what did she say???

She kind of changed the subject.
(didn't seem like it was in a way to avoid the answer)

Alty
Dec 25, 2008, 11:39 AM
Sounds like she's stuck in the friend zone.

You're being subtle about you intentions and she's subtly telling you she's not interested in anything but friendship.

Stop playing games, instead of hinting that you want to go on a date, tell her you want to go on a date and see what happens then.

Maybe she's not ready to date anyone, or maybe she really does just want you as a friend.

Good luck.

bb4
Dec 25, 2008, 12:31 PM
I see what you guys are saying... I was kind of thinking the same thing, just needed someone to say something.

Thanks for the advise.