Hello, I was looking for some advice. I am 26 years old, recently divorced my high school sweet heart. We dated for 8 years were married for less then a year. (my fault for the divorce) well I started dating another man shortly after, he is 49. He promised me the world, security happines family and a happy home and so on. He told he was going through a divorce as well. We moved in together and have been living together for a year. Things were great we both did things and expericanced new things. Well just last night we had a talk about the future, He has not started his divorce, he is seprated so I asked him when he was going to start the divorce and he told me that he can't until his WIFE gets a job (she never work a day in her life while they were married) and gets situated, he does not want to divorce her because she will not health insurance, she needs knee surgury. Then I said that one day not anytime soon I want to be married again and have children have a FAMILY... I have never had children. He has two boys well they are 22 and 21. He told me that he is getting older so he does not think he would be able to have kids... so I Don't KNOW> should I stay with him never getting married never having children or should I cut my ties with him and move on... I want to be happy... I love him but I love myself more... please someone help

I am sorry about your situation but I must say if he said he was getting divorced but he hasn't yet because of his wife has to get a job there is a possibility that his wife will never get a job just to keep him where she wants him.

I must say in my opinion cut your ties and your young so why not go for someone younger that you can have kids and ejoy the life that you still have. You wants kids then look for someone around your age.

Hey you deserve to live the life that the mn your with ived. He lived his life why not live yours?

You already know this is ending. Your guy isn't available, isn't going to MAKE himself available EVER (admit it) and the future you KNOW is yours is taken away pursuing a life with this unavailable man.

What exactly are you unclear about? Love may be blind, but you're not. Let's get this thing done so you can start the process to finding YOUR family dream. Every day you stay in this mess is just avoidable frustration.

You're a grown up now, you can admit something you want to be true isn't true, right? You actually can move on, it's not the end of the world, no matter how sad it makes you now. Staying in this situation won't make you sad, it will make you miserable.

Take the short-term sad over miserable... that's my advice. You know all this already, too, don't you?

I think the answer is easy, and deep down you know the answer. You need to move on. He is old enough to be your father as you know, and while you may think age is just a #, you should be with a man closer to your own age so you can go through life and experience the things you want to experience with him. His children are 2 years younger than you! Move on, there are a lot of men in the world, who can also promise you love and the world. Besides the age thing, I don't think it is fair for you to be in the middle of a divorce. You deserve to be the center of attention from a guy and it's not worth getting your emotions in the middle of.

Honestly, I think it would be healthy for you to take some time for yourself and just be single for a year or so and enjoy ouyr 20's!! I mean you were married to one guy for years, and then hoped into another very adult relationship I'm sure. Go out and date around, hang with your girlfriends, hop on a flight to Vegas... be 26 and Fabulous!

I know at times it gets lonely, we all want a man, but just lean on your friends and the independent gal you should be.

Good luck!

Hmmmmmmmmmmm
I have heaps to say about dating an older man because I dated some-one 20 years my senior and it was a living hell for me, he was separated with three kids , then I got pregnant and he kept on hiding me and the baby which really made me sad, today he doesn't want to see me or the baby ,I can't believe such people can do things like this so please be careful from him , I think he's playing you