I hope that this site can help me as I hate not being able to talk to anyone.. I am so insecure about myself and I don't know why men find me atractive but I am just not happy the way I look like. I have this Boyfriend noe and he really loves me he moved from cpt to stay with me and I am really happy wanne plan our future together so because I am so insecure I feel that he would cheat on me so I keep on cheking up on him and so this one day I look on his phone and found allot of porn :mad: what should I do he knows I hate porn and he said he hates it too,but does that mean he would cheat on me?? He is such a nice guy and that shocked me I wish I never went onhis fone...

So firstly what is it about the way you look that has you so insecure about yourself..

But if you keep checking on him, and checking his phone, you will push him away doing that.

Its just I feel that there is always some one better than me out there for my boyfriend.

He does not know that I look at his stuff doe you feel porn is normal or is it a sign that he is not loyal?

Yes porn is normal! He is a man. Just because someone looks at porn does not make them unloyal. You have got to get this right in YOUR head! You cannot constantly worry about things you have no control over. Just learn to be comfortable with yourself. If you two are in love then you have nothing to worry about. There are always people out there that are more "attractive" than you or he, but that doesn't mean they are better.

Its just I feel that there is always some one better than me out there for my bf.

he does not know that I look at his stuff doe u feel porn is normal or is it a sign that he is not loyal??

Look if he loves you for who you are, and the kind of person you are, then there shouldn't be no problem. Here's the reality of the situation... there will always be someone who looks better than you, make more money... its just the truth... so don't stress yourself out over that. Just be you.

And him having porn just means he is a freak... doesn't actually mean he will cheat on you. A lot of men have porn.

I know all these things its just for some reason I am struggeling to controle my emotions but you rite I should rather focus on what I can control! Tanx

Look if he loves you for who you are, and the kind of person you are, then there shouldn't be no problem. Here's the reality of the situation...there will always be someone who looks better than you, make more money...its just the truth...so don't stress yourself out over that. Just be you.

And him having porn just means he is a freak...doesn't actually mean he will cheat on you. Alot of men have porn.


Thank you sweet guy for takinkg time to mak e me relise that I am being silly and there is more to life than stressing about these things and being myself is the best silution. take care

Hit me up on here anytime. Glad I could help. You do sound like a really good girl. Just don't worry too much. You'll be OK...

Keep in mind too... there is no such thing as an ugly person! Everyone is beautiful in their own way. It is up to YOU first and foremost to realize this, and then you can accept or not accept someone else's opinion. You do not need validation of someone else to be beautiful.. you already are beautiful! Believe it and live like it. Besides, girls have all the power as it is. Women can literally go out and get any man they want if they set their mind to it. It is us guys that have a problem with insecurity.

So nice to hear guys say all of this. I will change my mind set and be moer possitive would be more healthy for me and my boyfriend...

Yes it would... enjoy your relationship...

Educate yourself, discuss your feelings with your b/f, and get some help to guide you through the process of raising yourself esteem, and confidence.

Oh sweetie I know how you feel, I have struggled all my life with this. I can tell you that as you get a bit older you become more confident. I just turned 25 and I feel I am finally becoming comfortable with who I am. I know it can be confusing when guys find you attractive but you just can't see it. I am in the adult industry and have guys hitting on me all the time but when I look in the mirror I just don't see it. My advice would be to throw yourself into life, find a hobby or something you like and focus on it, working out can really change your confidence and also give your man some space. The fact that he likes porn is no concern. It is all about the dream aspect of it and the fact that we as humans are so attracted to sex. Please just know hun that as you find yourself on the inside you start to see the beauty on the outside. Just keep smiling :)

valmez thanks you actually brought tears to my eyes I still have to grow up as I resently turned 21 and maybe that is also part of the reasons I am like this being in the outside world is not as much fun as I thought! Wil defnitly take your advice and get a hobby you won't believe it but I actually work in a gym.. . :) take care and all the best for you xxx