View Full Version : No sex
mammabof3
Oct 21, 2008, 08:42 PM
Well I don't know if my husband is cheating on me or not we did have a problem with this other woman from his job where he was hiding a lying about a lot of things I spoke to the both of them and they both insisted there was nothing but friendship that all he needed was someone to talk to and for some reason he couldn't talk to me and ever since this happened I'm lucky if I get it once a month I'm 30 yrs old he is 36 and he used to be so lovy dovy with me and had great sex I mean we do have 3 kids but that doesn't mean no more sex what should I do I have a gut feeling something is going on and I am always right when I have this feeling I just don't know how to prove myself right or wrong help me
tickle
Oct 22, 2008, 04:14 AM
If he isn't having sex with you, and as you say, your sex life used to be okay, then you have to wonder where is he getting it from. What did you expect them to say when you confronted both of them, that yes,they were having an affair. If it isn't that one, then you had better keep your eyes and ears open.
WakkieRob
Oct 22, 2008, 04:28 AM
I'm a bloke in reverse my ex was having two relationships and a lot of sex with me as well. Now we have a baby and they want to keep it no way I'm going to let it happen. Hold onto your guns and when its time start blazing OK! You'll feel worse then better with time.
WakkieRob
Oct 22, 2008, 04:32 AM
Tell him I'm going to get another boyfriend if it carries on like this and see what his reaction is. Say to him if your lying to me then you better get out and live with her and I don't want nothing more to do with you. If you have kids then you better seek help from a solicitor!
Choux
Oct 22, 2008, 09:56 AM
Healthy men always want sex.
Sexual problems are always a reflection of problems with the relationship or individual personalilty problems, in my opinion. Sex doesn't occur in a vacuum. Having a healthy, happy, good sexual life requires a solid relationship and lack of personality problems.
Can you go to a good professional for help?
kanicky73
Oct 22, 2008, 10:17 AM
I think you sort of answered your own question my dear. You said that you are always right when you have these "feelings". So what makes this time any different from the others? Why are you doubting your instincts now? Its because of security. When we think of what we actually would do if we found our spouse cheatin, its as if an immediate defense mechanism comes up and we doubt everything and anything. You need to pop up at work unannounced and bring him lunch. See what's going on when you get there. Or if he goes out with the guys one night (or so he says) follow him. Ask where they are going and then go there. If you don't see his vehicle then you can say, I went there and you were not there. Where were you? Then you sit him down and say listen, Im not dumb. You are having an affair and its time we bring it to the front line and either deal with it, or find a solution. Be straight and to the point.
Xrayman
Oct 22, 2008, 03:25 PM
Classic affair "symptoms" very very much similar to what I have seen... check up on him, as stated above.
Bonnie46
Oct 22, 2008, 03:59 PM
First, before ANYTHING - get yourself tested at a clinic. You can fight about an affair or divorce later, but right now you have to make sure you don't get AIDS, hepatitis, or any other STD's.
Trust your gut and hire a lawyer pronto.
Bonnie46
Oct 22, 2008, 04:04 PM
Yes! Pop in at his work unannounced - ha! (wouldn't he just FREAK out?? ) or hire a babysitter in the evenings and follow him to see where he goes.
It's not fair, it's horrible! It's an awful situation with children involved, but you need to buck up and take charge. If he's cheating, then take him for every penny he's worth! Get a good lawyer. Give yourself a couple of years to move through the feelings of anger, heartache, betrayal etc. and eventually you'll meet and fall in love with someone who DESERVES you, respects you and LOVES to have GREAT SEX with you.