My fiancé and I have only been sexually active for a few months, I have known him 3 years. I found that he really doesn't know much about a women's "upper body parts." I told him that the whole deal of men getting kicked in the balls is really famous, but women getting hit, or getting pressure put on their ahem... "upper body parts" =) is also extremely painfull. I also told him that touching or kissing there normally has no feeling to it. He told me men just assume that women feel good right there, so if you kiss them, they will typically act like it feels good. I just laughed, I don't feel anything different than if he were to just kiss my forehead or my arm or my hand, etc. How come men don't know this?? I know it's a stupid question, but it makes me laugh =D

Actually that may be you, sorry but not true in the majority of women I know of. You have what you enjoy but to be honest this is not anything I have heard of.

I have been reading your posts, and wonder what your age really is, perhaps a young preteen playing on here?

Yes, I have only known two ladies that did not, one had nerve damage and the other another medical issue.

And while not my thing, I have known some that even like it somewhat "rough"

My guess from reading several of their posts, they are either posting silly posts they know are wrong as a joke,

Or they are preteens who are just playing, but that is just my guess.

No pre-teen playing here. The human chest is wired the same for both males and females. So, men, rub your breasts and squeeze your nipples and see if you get an erection?

For most, chest stimulation resuts in a movement of blood to the chest, that's it. Personally, I find it invasive. The two breasts are part of the three "main points of interest" on a woman. Start anywhere else, please!

I agree that there are three points of interest for most men. And please start and tease into those points. Don't GRAB AND EXPECT ME TO REPSOND.

However, I never felt anything in the chest area for years and now they are my favorite thing to be played with. If you are feeling you are missing something, then work on it. If you don't care, you need to let him know.

So I guess the answer is different for everyone. But I also agree they hurt and please don't pinch squeeze or tweak in a fassion you would not want done to you.

Most guys beyond adolescense knows women are for the most part sensitive there (the breasts). Oh there are some women that aren't but most are.

I'd say that them touching my breasts is OK, it's not magical.. If he ignored it completely then I'm sure my breasts would get lonely..

I've always thought that guys touching our breasts was more for them than it was for us..

And yes, if you hit our boobs it hurts, not as much as a guy getting hit in his family jewels but nonetheless be semi-gentle with 'em

First of all, this is an adult board, so to avoid confusion, please use adult words.

Breast is not an unacceptable term. Neither is chest, nipple, areola, etc...

Second, please don't assume your experience is the same for all women. Yes, men often have a breast fixation that is primal, dominating, and distracting.

But don't think for one moment that nipple stim is without any sexual pleasure for all women. There are members here on the board who will tell you that its an important part of their sexual play.

My partner isn't as interested early on with nipple stim during foreplay or intercourse, but late in the game the right nipple stim will absolutely push her over the top. Early on it can be a very pleasurable part of her building sexual tension.

It's the same with intercourse and oral. Some women respond best to clitoral stim, some feel no sensation with "g spot" stim, some can take strong pressure and stim with oral, some need the lightest touch.

As for your question, why doesn't your boyfriend know what you like? That's your job. Its your responsibility to tell a lover what you like and do not like. You didn't come with a manual. You might not be like other mates.

What worked like magic for a previous lover of mine... as in it was money in the bank all the time... the next girl HATED. Flat out hated it.

So... he's a clueless guy. Most of us start in that place. Through experience, education, exploration, and discussion... one that's open and honest and not "how-could-you-be-so-ignorant"... he'll buy half a clue, if he's at all interested.

Some guys never get the idea of listening to a lovers want, needs, desires. All you can do is give him the chance to listen to you... and that means not relying on his developing ESP. direct him, correct him, and be willing to "train" him.

Even the most experienced man isn't going to know what works best for you.

yes, I have only known two ladies that did not, one had nerve damage and the other another medical issue.

And while not my thing, I have known some that even like it somewhat "rough"

My guess from reading several of thier posts, they are either posting silly posts they know are wrong as a joke,

or they are preteens who are just playing, but that is just my guess.


Actually that may be you, sorry but not true in the majority of women I know of. You have what you enjoy but to be honest this is not anything I have heard of.

I have been reading your posts, and wonder what your age really is, perhaps a young preteen playing on here ??

Chuck, I just referenced the posts by the OP, and I really don't understand why you have such a problem with her. One of her posts says she's 18 and engaged. She has just as much of a right to be here and ask questions as you do... or anyone else for that matter. Because you are a chrisitanity expert on this site, I always expect you to be more respectful of other members here, not less...

Jamie, your fiancée is not wrong in thinking that women's breasts are very sensitive. I know that my breasts are by far one of the most sensitive parts of my body. Some women are also able to orgasm from breast/nipple stimulation alone. Everyone's bodies are wired differently. I have to say, I was surprised to read the posts (including yours) that talked about breast touch as nothing special. I thought pretty much everyone enjoyed it to some extent.

I actually did have one girlfriend who's breasts were so sensitive that I once gave her an orgasm while she sat on my leg without touching her below the breasts... and yeah... it was one that was real and honest too.


They can vary quite a lot from one woman to the next. And size has NOTHING to do with it.

Also, remember that not only can a woman be innervated differently from another woman (and even reportedly from one breast versus the other), but sensory stimuli aren't all there is to perceived sexual pleasure. Your mind is your most important sexual organ, and how the mind interprets the sensations can be very different from person to person, or situation to situation.

The OP'er mentioned how its well known that racking a guy can double him over. Well, stimulation at the testicles during sex can mentally be processed very differently... similar stimulus, different response.

A person might see an unclothed woman and be aroused, or might feel nothing sexual. Same visual stim, different mental processing.

Nipple stimulation, in one study, showed over 80% of the women in the survey cited it as an important part of sexual play when already aroused... which is an important note... it wasn't the first thing done to arouse the woman, it was used later, after sexual tension had already began building... a quarter of those women also cited having to stop a lover from stimulating too much...

Also, nipple stimulation results in the release of oxytocin, which is tied to bonding, decreased anxiety, and escalation of sexual arousal.

So... your boyfriend or fiancée isn't without his good reasons to be "doing it wrong"... you just both need to talk about what works and what doesn't...

I actualy did have one girlfriend who's breasts were so sensitive that I once gave her an orgasm while she sat on my leg without touching her below the breasts...and yeah....it was one that was real and honest too.

Last week, or the one before it, I gave my lover an orgasm with soft nipple stim and other peripheral stim that never once involved direct clitoral stim or penetration... it isn't the most common method we use, and takes an absolute mental release and an ability to be in the moment, completely losing yourself in the sensations, but it has happened in my bedroom as well.

last week, or the one before it, i gave my lover an orgasm with soft nipple stim and other peripheral stim that never once involved direct clitoral stim or penetration... it isnt the most common method we use, and takes an absolute mental release and an ability to be in the moment, completely losing yourself in the sensations, but it has happened in my bedroom as well.
Never pulled this off with the wife, she's wired differently. But the exgirlfriend had one that was so intense we needed a towel to clean up the snail trail, her eyeys rolled back in her head and she damn near fell over backwards. Wish I could pull that one off for the wife however. That's the one thing I haven't been able to figure out what her combination is to pull it off in the years we've been married.

A young preteen? Ha! No, I'm actually 18 years old. I can't really prove it except to say that my fiancé is 20, I currently live at my aunt's house, she's helping me find a job at her work place on campus. My fiancé is waiting to augment into active duty in the USMC, he's going to be a recruiter soon, he went to the MCRD in San Diego for bootcamp last summer, he went to basic in Camp Pendleton, he went to his MOS in Camp Lejeune, Jacksonville, N. Carolina. He was at the Army Arsenal in Rock Island as an active reservist, now he's off orders, I don't know what to say to "prove" my maturity =) I'm really not a mature person, I don't ever want to grow up.

Oh, and I have told him that I don't feel anything there except yeah, sensitivity. He really doesn't care, he still likes to play anyway, and I don't really care because I don't feel anything. When it comes to that stuff, I'm really not picky, I don't get angry at him if he wants a "quicky" and I don't feel anything, or if I don't orgasm like the last 3 times we had sex, I don't freak out or anything.

Never pulled this off with the wife, she's wired differently.
I've been able to do this with her only three times, and one of those was her stim her chest while I bit at her ears, which she normally hates... but for some reason that time it just all fell into place, much to my surprise... its so completely dependent on her being mentally ready for that stim... most of the time it wouldn't push her over the top, just set her up for other stim... the mind is amazing, bewildering, maddening, and incredible...

ive been able to do this with her only three times, and one of those was her stim her chest while i bit at her ears, which she normally hates... but for some reason that time it just all fell into place, much to my surprise... its so completely dependent on her being mentally ready for that stim... most of the time it wouldnt push her over the top, just set her up for other stim... the mind is amazing, bewildering, maddening, and incredible...I've been trying for 17 years... who knows, maybe tonight will be the first for her. Never give up.

Well, since we're getting so personal...

As a woman who has climaxed from breast/nipple stimulation without direct clitoral stimulation or penetration far more times than I can count, I will definitely vouch for the incredible pleasures breasts can bring. Honestly, when I was a virgin teen and playing around with my boyfriend, I would often try to hide the fact that he had brought me to orgasm because I didn't want him to think I was too excited or easily stimulated.

Every woman is different, and I don't know the medical specifics on this, but it seems like having different parts of the body stimulated will lead to different kinds of orgasms. For me, the best way to describe the sensation would be to say that it feels like the nipples are directly connected to the whole nerve center down there.

At the same time, I don't think most women can orgasm this way. If your woman's wires aren't set to do it, trying might be fun, but there's no more reason to feel disappointed if she doesn't get there than if she were sucking on yours. Since it is so uncommon, if you do bring a woman over the edge this way, you should feel very proud of yourself. There's an imperfect art to getting all of the steps right, and it is a magical experience.

One thing worth considering is that both nipples and breasts can feel very different during the cycle of a month. They can become much more sensitive at certain times, and sometimes that means becoming so sensitive it becomes uncomfortable. Breast tenderness is also common for many women at different times of the month.

One more thing, at least in my case. Although the idea of climaxing by breasts alone is sexy as hell, it's even better when attention upstairs is in addition to attention downstairs. So maybe those women who aren't blown away by nipple stimulation alone might be blown away when other things are going on too.

Here is a different perspective, I'm male and I adore stimulation of my nipples during sex/masturbation, it will push me over the edge EVERY TIME. Sex without my nipples being stimulated , for me is very boring.

So to the OP, guys don't have a tattoo that says "mind reader" on their forehead, that makes them able to read YOUR sexual wants/non-wants may be just like you can't read my mind as to what I'm thinking at this stime about the myriad of answers given to this thread.

Well time for cold shower and a long confession,

But I do believe this well ( OK maybe too well) covers the issue that a lot of women do have a lot of feelings there.

OP may not, but she can not assume this is normal since it really does not appear to be the norm,

You are young so you probably don't know that you are responsible for your sexual feelings, your own passion, your own orgasmic response... men are a partner in pleasure, and a woman has to be a full partner by knowing her body, communicating her pleasure points, asserting herself sexually, and so on. :)

If you h ave a mind full of blame... you are not approaching sexuality in the right mindset, girl!! Mutual pleasure. :)

Blame? Like how?

Stating "how do men NOT KNOW this" does kind of place the burden on the supposed, and often real, ignorance of us guys.

You've said since that you've told him you aren't responsive but seem a little annoyed that he persists...

But that's kind of like being upset that he likes beer if you don't... he still is going to like it.

Yes, he should try to find middle ground and try not to distract you or annoy you... but as long as you view this as something he does that's not especially positive, you might be making sex less than it could be...

Not to say he should just do what pleases him... but can you turn this into something more than just being present?

So simply letting him have his way isn't what she's talking about... she's saying you need to try to use his fetishes to mentally prime your mind... sure, you might not feel as much as others have mentioned, but you do have an ability to arouse your mind by watching your lover become aroused... right?

I'm all for the direct, physical feeling I have during sex, foreplay, petting, etc... but its amplified by my watching my lovers arousal escalate...

I honestly don't care if he persists, I can't feel anything, but if he wants to do it, it doesn't bother me at all.

I think quite clearly the key thing here is that everyone is different and so it is about finding out what is good for the person that you are with and surely the fun is in the exploring anyway!