Oh I hate being a moan but I'm getting so frustrated with my boyfriend.

I feel like I am doing all the work in my relationship.

Now my oh is very honest and spends lots of time with me etc but he never surprises me with presents or does nice things for me. I am constantly buying him things I think he'll like, cooking for him and making compromises but he just plods along without seeming to spare a thought for me.

Am I in the wrong? Should I hold back more?

Have you talked to your boyfriend about this? Every time someone does something nice they expect something in return. If it bothers you that he doesn't act the same way, let him know your thoughts. Otherwise, I don't think you should hold yourself back if that is who you truly are. The main key is communication. I'm obviously not an expert, it's just my opinion. :D

Near as I can tell you've been together for 8 months, have a terrible temper, and have broken up because of this, got back together, and now are having a problem again.

There is no honest communications going on between you, and you have some high expectations with someone you don't know very well.

He is who he is, and honestly you sound fixated on him acting a certain way, instead of seeing him as he really is.

Too much, to soon, crash and burn.

You do what you want. He does what he wants. If you two are compatible in the "wants", stay together. If not, consider the experiment concluded and close up the lab.

Start a new experiment.

Near as I can tell you've been together for 8 months, have a terrible temper, and have broken up because of this, got back together, and now are having a problem again.

There is no honest communications going on between you, and you have some high expectations with someone you don't know very well.

He is who he is, and honestly you sound fixated on him acting a certain way, instead of seeing him as he really is.

To much, to soon, crash and burn.


Excuse me? You don't know me or my relationship so I think it's a bit presumptuous of you to say that I have a terrible temper and that I don't know him very well.

I am having a small problem because I feel I am doing too much in the relationship... no mention whatsoever of a temper or anything.

We're actually communicating well at the minute and haven't had a fight since we got back together almost 3 months ago.

Rippedinside... yes thanks we have spoken about it and he says he does love me and he loves how thoughtful I am but I have to try and appreciate that he isn't like that and to accept him for how he is. To be fair though he does little things that don't involve splashing cash like makes my bed the way I like it and is very good with my son and my parents etc.


And there is no way we're starting a "new experiment" :) ;) This time is for keeps we just have to work a bit harder than last time.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating/real-time-213109.html,

This is where the temper thing came from, and after 8 months there is still a lot to learn by you both. It takes time, and some patients for partners to learn to work together, and communications is the foundation to build a healthy relationship.

I agree you have a small problem that needs you both to work at it, but changing him will be a very difficult proposition. As I said he is who he is, and as you have said, there are something's that he does well.

Don't make a small problem a big one with impatience. You have plenty of time to work on solutions and resolve issues.

And don't be so defensive.

I have a family member who has a similar attitude. We let him live with us, and he was polite and cooked 3 times a week. But then, my mother decided she would rather cook, well, after 6 months of this he did absolutley nothing for the family except make our grocery bill higher and electric bill higher. I think that if you give too much in the beginning the person will continue to just expect more and more and eventually give nothing but a pain in the a*s.

(Pardon my awful spelling, I'm on a Mac computer and have no idea how to operate them.)