Hey.
Well, I'm 17 and I'v had a few "one-night-stands" and I know it's probably not the best thing to be doing but I am safe.
But I just don't feel I could do anything sober...

I have had bf's but as soon as it gets serious I end it, blaiming it on the fact that I don't like them or want I to be single.

I really would like to have a sexual relationship with someone but as soon as they get close I back off.

I don't know why I'm like this all my mates seem to have no problems having bf's but I seem have some sort of insecurity with intamicy. I'm so confused. Please Help.

Thanks.

Xx

Maybe you don't have a problem with intimacy, maybe you have a problem with "lax" intimacy.

Maybe you know the relationships you've been in aren't "til death do us part" relationships and some part of your mind doesn't really want to do this at all until then.

Maybe.

Thank yooo Lbeaucaire for commenting but I don't think that's it because I really don't want to get married... ever lol. Unless it is deep down in my unconscious...

OK I'm 17 and I'm with a girl now for the last 7 months which for me is a record she had the same issues as you , she got over the problem by making light of it and not getting to heavy go out with the guy get drunk have sex have fun... you don't need to say that you really lik ehim and vice versa that bond juts comes after a while.. sex is fun and if you really lik esomeon it shouldn't be an issue :) good luck:)

Thank yooo Jbeaucaire for commenting but I don't think thats it because I really don't want to get married... ever lol. Unless it is deep down in my unconcious...That's exactly what I'm suggesting.


Also, when someone makes a declaration and then laughs, it usually means, "I wish this were true, but even I don't really buy it." Like this:

I really don't want to get married... ever lol.

Sex in a relationship is a completely different situation to a one night stand, you actually have to find out stuff about this person, discover what his/her sexual preferences are, and even get feedback on how the sex was, if the relationship is open and relaxed enough. Do you think maybe you have a fear of criticism? From a person you may actually care for? And for this reason run for the hills, when things get to heated. Its just a possible solution I thought could be an answer. Im a 20 yr guy, who prefers relationships weeell above one night stands, but I do feel a lot more nervous (initially) when about to have sex with someone I actually care for, and want to see again after wards.