View Full Version : Ex is hurting me
lashay10
Oct 15, 2008, 01:02 AM
My boyfriend told me he wanted a break and I said OK now he is talking to a girl but he is telling me they are just friends. And on Friday he askjed me to stay home with him and not to go to work and that he would pay me for my time so we had sex and he said we where together then when I was there he was textin the girl and I went through his call log they where on the phone for two hours..
So I am hurt I been with him for 9 months and he keeps telling me he wants to be friends and he gets mad if I am going to hang wit one of my guy friends what am I to do?
And its so hard not to talk to him its such a temptation I love him oh but since I left his house Friday we really haven't talked and he told me we won't work out but why does he want to be my friend so bad??
pluckyflamingo
Oct 15, 2008, 09:42 AM
Sounds very familiar, even though it is hard, move on with your life. He is the type of guy that just wants to have sex. He probably wants to keep the "friend" status so he can "do" who he wants when he wants. He may be saying the same thing to the other girl. I know that friends with benefits work out for some people. But for you it is not. You have to many feelings invested in him and you just need to cut the cord and move on.
someone1989
Oct 15, 2008, 10:03 AM
It seems that your boy friend is just looking for sex and if he wants to keep you as a friend it is just cause of that if one they he missed the other girl still has you for sex or othar yhing.He knows that you love him and he is abuseing you.Then be careful.He will breake your heart again.Because it is not important for him that your hear breaks or not.He just wants you as a sex partener.
SimpleguyJoe
Oct 15, 2008, 11:00 AM
I agree with these other posts sadly. From the info you gave us it seems he has put you on the back burner and is just manipulating you to have sex with him because he has a lot of leverage over you because you love him so much.so you don't want to cut it off but that's exactly what he wants. He wants you to keep coming back with small hopes until he gets what he wants and throws you away until the next time that he needs you.
So if I were you I would be hanging out with whoever you want because he sure as hell will be hanging with whatever girls he wants and you can be damn sure he will try to justify his actions while trying to keep you alone.
lashay10
Oct 18, 2008, 11:15 PM
Ok I wanted to see if my boyfriend was using me for sex and I went to his house and we had sex but also ate me out..
And he kept telling me how much he loves me..
But after the sex I went through his phone and it was a girl in the under the name nene my baby.. So I got mad and broke his phone should I get him a new one? But anyway I'm supposed to be pregnant by him and he said he is going to be here for me and my baby but we going to just be friends cause we can't work what am I to do..
Cause I really feel he is playing with my emotions..
SimpleguyJoe
Oct 19, 2008, 02:45 PM
Umm how old are you again? You really should have took our advice before this guy should not be worth you time.
lashay10
Oct 19, 2008, 08:13 PM
I'm 17.. And should I get him a new phone I told him I wouldn't cause he shouldn't have been playing games
SimpleguyJoe
Oct 19, 2008, 08:59 PM
What kind of phone was it. He should have had a warranty on it. Just make up some excuse and send it in for a new one. Also if he does not, I would buy him a new one if I were you. You have no right to break his stuff even if he was playing you or just being a in general.
And your 17 and pregnant? 17 year old pegnancies can ruin your life. How far are you? And what's your thoughts on abortion? ( yes I know ill catch A lot of crap for even putting it out there.)
lashay10
Oct 19, 2008, 10:06 PM
Well he has insurance but I'm not paying for the deductable cause he owes me money I told him to take it from that..
And I'm not sure if I'm pregnant I sure hope I'm not but if so I won't have the baby because it wouldn't do either of us any good..
O and why is it when I say I'm on the phone he wants to know who it is? Or get mad if I say it's a guy?
kitten420
Oct 26, 2008, 07:56 PM
Yea he isn't anytime soon going to be with you again. When a guy says he wants a "break" it most likley means he wants to move on to new and better things bc/ he is either bored with you or he wants to find another challenge. (if you know what I mean.) Him having you come over to hang out is just his way of getting some because he knows you will give it up. HE might be there for the baby but it doesn't sound like he wants to be with you. Most likely if he found out you might be pregnant the first time and he truly wanted to make it work and be with you . He would have shown effort and he would be there for you right away. And as long as you keep hanging out with him and giving him what he wants he is going to just use you for what you give him. Id drop him. He sounds worthless to me. How would I know THis has happened to me Twice with my ex. Same situation except I found out I really was pregnant. He didn't want anything to do with me even though he said he would be there he wasn't. In the end though I always ended up giving him what he wanted. After that it took me 2 years to even get over the bastard. HOW long have you been together?
lashay10
Oct 26, 2008, 09:56 PM
Thank you so much..
Well I've moved on! ND since I have he has been jealous and begging me to be w/him but I'm having fun and he acts how we did before the relationship ever changed what do I do?
kitten420
Oct 26, 2008, 10:36 PM
Did you ever find out if you were pregnant. That's exactly what my ex used to do. As soon as I would move on and I was starting to do fine. Here he go knocking on my door practically begging for me back and acting jealous. Well guess what he went back to doing the same thing he did before. The only reason he is probably chasing you is because he probably just misses the fact that you were the one that was by his side and gave in to his needs. As soon as you take him back though he would probably turn around and do the same thing to you again. Now I am not saying that all guys are like this, I am just giving you advise that I know about bc/ I have been through it so many times and I have seen so many of my friends go through the same thing. Maybe he is different who knows but as long as your having fun... keep having it!! What exactly is he saying or doing when he says he wants you back?
lashay10
Oct 27, 2008, 09:59 PM
Well he is calling me and wanting to stay on the phone all night and he is just giving me so much attention and yeah I'm pregnant, according to the test so now what? He is telling me he messed up and I'm breaking hias heart byy having fun w/ others and not taking him bak!
someone1989
Oct 28, 2008, 02:08 AM
Well it seems that you did a big risk!When you thaugh you are pregnant and you needed him you must be very care full!Because the men always run away from their children and by this you made a good pretext for him to leave you alone and break your date and run away from his kid.Now if you want to keep this baby you need his father!you have to say him that he was wrong and he is your only love and you did it cause of that you thaugh he is going to leave you alone and you just wanted to get him back in your life.I think the reality and saying facts will be more effective than unsuitable justifications!Trust me!
kitten420
Oct 28, 2008, 09:37 AM
Well considering the fact that you are pregnant with his child if he is really willing to be with you and give it a shot. Then you need to try to work it out. If you truly believe he wants you back then try to make it work for the kid. Clearly let him know though that if he messes up again and you catch him talking to females like that on his phone then its over with.
lashay10
Oct 28, 2008, 08:16 PM
Thankk you guyss so so much well I'm going to keep you updated so yeaaa come check on me!