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View Full Version : Girl feels bad about sexual experiences


CaGuy
Sep 6, 2008, 09:19 PM
What are your guy's thoughts on this: Basically I've been "seeing" this girl (we are both 22) now for around 6 months. We really haven't done much other than makeout. I really like her and want to date her and according to what she says she wants the same thing. However she says she's not ready right now as she feels her life isn't in a position that she'd be able to contribute to a relashipship. Other than that we do everything a boyfriend/girlfriend would do. I feel really good we can be so close emotionally and have none of this based on sex. However I DO like sexual contact and I do crave more. She says she does as well but she resists all the time (I'm not sure why). A few days ago things really got heated and while we were making out and she ended up half naked. She REALLY seemed to be liking it and I was feeling her all over. But after the fact she told me how bad it made her feel and that she really felt bad. (she's not a virgin and has done stuff like this in the past with other guys so it's not a new thing for her) This makes me think a) she either has some underlying "issue"... possible abuse, b) why was she able to do this stuff with other guys on more than one occasion but not me? c) if she doesn't like this now will she ever? We have known each other for 2 years and in the past 6 months is when things have moved to a new level. This who situation makes me feel terrible as I REALLY do like her a lot. I could pretty much say I've fallen in love with her. Any opinions are appreciated. Thanks

isc_enrique
Sep 6, 2008, 10:08 PM
Don't worry brother, girls needs a lot of time, because sometimes they get confused or maybe she doesn't want you to think about her only for sex...

Maybe she has some bad experiences back there like that, the best way to know that kind of stuff its asking her, obviously with indirect questions, or talking about past relationships, but this doesn't work sometimes, because this could be uncomfortable for her, for you or both...

My opinion is, give her time, if you're in love with her then you must make her comfortable, and everything else will come by itself...

P.D. - Forgive my horrible English Synt... I hope you can understand my opinion xD

Greetings from Mexico!

SweetDee
Sep 8, 2008, 03:14 AM
She clearly needs more time... she even said so!

She may have felt bad because it got so heated and she had to turn it off... Things may have gone too far... she obviously feels very sexy with you, but could have felt bad about "going so far" when she's not ready.

If you really like her you'll wait... You'll be patient and you won't pressure her. Love is calm security and the trust that your loved one will be there for you no matter what. Show her this and she'll respond.

She may or may not have abuse issues in her past, if you're so curious why don't you just ask her.

If you can't talk about anything then there's no trust. No trust, no friendship... no friendship no love. It's a triangle... all sides lean and depend on the other. This is is what defines love...

Fr_Chuck
Sep 8, 2008, 05:42 AM
Let me see you are not dating, but yet making out, to the point of her half naked.

So you date, be friends and in several months it may lead to sex. I you are too tied into having to have sex, then you move on to a girl that is just into hooking up with you, with someone else, just hooking up.

But guess what a lot of girls want to wait till a relationship is serious,