>.< oh boy I can't believe I am posting this on a Message board but here it goes.
Some how I kind of sorta>.> developed feelings for my friend... I am totally oblivious
About she feels too ><. We are really good friends and we tell each other personal stuff
That we wouldn't tell anybody else. But this is the major problem, she's engaged to a azzhole (not my words these are hers)... But she is very dissatisfied with her relationship but still loves him and has talked about leaving him. I would like to think of some of the things I pick up as hints that she might like me, but I think it just might be high hopes. She frequently asks for me to hang out with her but I can't help to wonder, I am I in the "Friends Zone". I mean I can tell she badly wants to be wanted, and I badly want to show her I want her. Her finance is very inconsiderate, she does everything for him and never gets a thank you or I love baby. I mean the freakin A-Hole wouldn't pick her up when her car broke down, he response was "Why in the hell do you think I'll go pick you up it's not my fault your car broke."(When she told me this I almost started to cry in front of her but caught myself.I mean if you love someone aren't you always supposed to be there for them emotionally and physically. Please help I am lost and need to be found.

P.S I have absolutely no Dating experience what so ever ><
And sorry for the little ran t I needed that...

That's a hard one to answer. She may just like that she can talk to a male friend that will listen to her problems with her boyfriend. I would just keep on listening, and not interfere with her relationship, but let her know that you will be there for her, no matter what she decides.

I wouldn't act on your feelings right now. Just show her respect, and give your input. The last thing she needs right now is something else to worry about. The best relationships start as friendships anyway, and if she is not sure about her fiancée, just tell her to make sure she is making the right decision before she walks down that isle.

I personally don't think she should be marrying this guy, if she is already calling him an "azzhole". That sounds like a train wreck just waiting to happen. But, it's hard to say if she is just using you as a sounding board, or if she is sending you mixed signals.

Like I said, just be there as a respectful friend, give her unbiased advice if you need to, but don't push it.

Good luck! :)

Thank you for your input. I know not to say anything or influence her I love her too much as a friend to manipulate her like that. What you said about being a sound board hit the spot. I just hope its what she wants and try to be there for her.

Hopefully she realizes that you are willing to be there for her, and that if everything goes to hell in a handbag, that she can turn to you. You sound like you are a good friend, and maybe sooner or later she will realize that the azzh*le is just that, and good guys don't always finish last. In fact, the bad guys might win the 40 mile dash, but the good guys win the race in the long run! ;)

Thank you, I really needed to hear that even if it was from a complete stranger.
I am so new to this whole drama mess I feel lost, but in the end everything will be for the better I suppose.

No prob! Just call me Auntie Starby... lol! I wish you all the luck in the world!

I would still appreciate others input or thoughts on this, the more the merrier. I am so inexperienced that others experiences would help shine some more light my way ^^ cause as you can tell I am very young

There will be more people on during the afternoon I'm sure. (depending on where they live) Someone else will chime in at some point.

LOL I didn't mean right now ^^. I was simply stating I wanted more input because I thought maybe others wouldn't put there 2 cents in because you have already ready helped me quite a bit :P

Oh no, all I meant is that there are not many others around at this time. It's always good to get another take on the situation. Since you are new here, I was only trying to explain that a lot of the members will come on during day. It's 6am where I am, and a lot of our members are from the States, so they would be on a little later. I'm sure others will put their 2 cents in. :D

>< wow this hurts I am pretty sure everyone knows now and I learned this after they invited me over to hang out everyone excluded me and made me feel unwanted. They were very blunt. I guess I am pretty sure I just lost all my close friends and this might break me. They gave me this look like how could you and I just couldn't take it and left

I don't understand. Did you do something else that you haven't mentioned? Why would they be giving you the "how could you" look. How could you do what? Did you tell another friend how you felt about her, and they busted you? You'll have to say a little more about what went on.

Sorry you had a bad night.

No I acted how I always do I just sat there and talked to everyone and played games with them. I don't understand ethier but sh*t happens I guess ill just have to see it through now even though I might lose some friends thanks anyway guys

That really sucks! I hope your friends realize they were acting like idiots. I'm sorry no one else came on to answer but me. You might still get other answers. I really thought you would have gotten more by now. Unfortunately sometimes a question is missed. That doesn't happen a lot though, so don't let it stop you from asking other questions okay?

Again, so sorry you had a rotten night!

Thank you at least lol I never had much friends and I am so new to this drama bull... its just too much work ><

You better take a crash course in Drama 101, it's bound to drive you nuts! LOL!

I think you should tell her how you feel before it's too late and she marries the "*-hole".

I agree that when you are in a relationship that both parties should be there for one another unconditionally.

Hurry and talk to her... you can do this. It's worth it...

Oh, by the way... you didn't state whether you're male or female.. (Only because you make it sound so surprising that you fell for this girl... )...

Lmao i am male

I have met a few girls like this who have boyfriends who treat them like this. I think it is something deeper that allows people to be treated this way. They may even get a strange pleasure from being treated like this.

Hmmm...
I wouldn't say anything, because that could hurt your friendship with her, as well as her relationship with this other guy. You have to be careful about what you say, because you don't want to become the guy who just puts down whoever she is with.

I was in a similar situation with my last girlfriend. I met her while she was dating another guy. She had been dating this guy for 4 months, so they were no where close to getting married, which makes my situation much different. Anyway, I didn't give any negative imput about him to her, and just listened. Before I knew it, she broke up with him, and began dating me.

What I am trying to say, is that saying bad things about her fiancé isn't going to get you anywhere.

However, as other members said, maybe just telling her how you feel could work.

I hear you... ill just have to play the waiting game for my time to go 4 it. 1 thing is that I didn't think I handled right was that I didn't really trash talk about her fiancé, I just stated back to her what she said to me in my on words to convey what I got from her then stated what I thought those meant and her reaction was agreement but I am not too sure how she felt about that? (sorry if my grammar sucks this reads funny to me too... I mean there's no periods >.>)

Not all girls are healthy enough to know what they want, not all girls (if they are truthful) WANT a healthy relationship the way we think of as healthy.

I truly don't understand them, but there it is. I have a pretty good idea of the benefits of being with someone who actually cherishes you... but some girls simply don't.

Further, not everyone can be taught. This forum alone is proof of that. People actually come here, ask for advice on a problem, then completely freak when the advice resembles something like "stop whining, take responsibility for the way your life is turning out and make better choices."

"You mean I have to leave the cheater/abuser/deadbeat/addict? But I love him!?" O... K...

I'm sorry, but your friend, whom you also "like", may never... and I mean NEVER... walk away from this bad relationship. I appreciate your care and concern. That's a sign of good character on your part.

But don't put anything else in your life on hold while you watch her debacle from the sidelines, OK? You may be wasting a LOT of time on her. You still need to live.

>< wow this hurts i am pretty sure everyone knows now and i learned this after they invited me over to hang out everyone excluded me and made me feel unwanted. they were very blunt. I guess i am pretty sure i just lost all my close friends and this might break me. They gave me this look like how could you and i just couldn't take it and left

I don't understand how others found out. Why would you loose all your close friends? If they know, does she know how you feel about her as well now?