Hello! Ok I am bi but have mostly leaned to being gay as that is where my sexual desires had lay. I like the company of females very much for the most part as they are generally appealing because of their softness and pretty things that they wear and how they carry themselves. I have never really been interested in sex though with females and has been a turn off just the thought of touching them in their intimate parts. I have for 2 years now been friends with a young lady that I have recently acquired quite an attraction to and have considered doing things I haven't been inclined to. We get along very well and spend quality time together that we both enjoy very much. She is a very intelligent, sincere, loyal, and caring person and those are the qualities that have attracted me so much to her in the first place. It is of recently that I have begun thinking more of her and decided to make some changes in my life such as putting behind me the gay relationships I had been involved in and getting rid of the gay porn and such. I desire to now be a man she can be proud of not wanting her to believe for a moment that I would ever want anyone else but her. The attraction I have for her is maddening so that the sexual desire I have is ever present to do things that I think may be nasty. I feel that when I talk to her intimately that I do so as if I am talking to another guy though and belittling her. She has been very tolerant of my behavior and desire to be with her and I love her all the much more so for it. So what it gets down to is this.. I cannot stop thinking about her and have to continually comfort myself while thinking things that are dirty and it is now in my conversation with her every time I turn around and I cannot stop telling her. With a guy, that can never be too much and they love to hear it! Will I be destroying our relationship talking to her with the same sexual passion that I have used in the past with men? If so, is there any good books written my a female that is truthful about how they need to be treated and loved? Thanks in advance for your considerations!

You love someone as you are, and as they are. You cannot love someone based on past relationships or on how a book tells you to.