PDA

View Full Version : Can tyou trust a borderline alcohlic will stop?


magrock
Aug 25, 2008, 12:24 PM
My ex & I broke up in June... we love each other a lot & 1 of my reasons is he is what I call a silent alcoholic... he is an artist & drinks a lot when he writes music.. he doesn't get drunk or become violent but he does drink a lot. I love him dearly I wonder if an alcohlic can actually make a commitment... I feel he is my soulmate but him having this problem makes me want to run away... he told me he is willing to stop if I take this relationship serious... it has really made me think this summer I have been trying to find myself this summer by dating others or just having time for myself but I can not help wonder what if he did dedicate himself to make a commitment that everything will be OK...

Anyone been through a similar experience?

plonak
Aug 25, 2008, 12:59 PM
Ok yes I have been in a similar situation..

I dated a sober alcoholic meaning he's been sober for three years, but he still has an addictive personality and always will for the rest of his life..

During our relationship he became a gambeling addict and it was awful.. He lied to me all the time..

The thing about dating an addict is that it's hard for you to trust them..

It can be very damaging that he's not emotionally healthy and from my experience my ex boyfriend dragged me way down with him..

You CANNOT change someone and they CANNOT change for YOU, they have to change for THEMSELVES or nothing will be curred... YOu need to understand that..

I suggest you run away.. let him deal with his demons on his own.. don't let him drag you down with him..

I know you love him, but I loved my ex too, and it simply wasn't enough... I was hurt too many times.. hope you take my advice and save yourself some MAJOR heartache and pain in the longrun

magrock
Aug 25, 2008, 01:05 PM
plonak- thank you for your words... I saw him recently after 2 months of being apart & all my feelings came back... I ask myself why do I have to feel so connected to someone who I know may not fully cure... I have had a rough month of dating other guys & not feeling the same inner connection w/other guys however I do get excited because I know these guys are not alcoholic & can offer me a better life... I am soooo confused... the thing is I do trust him as a man I don't trust his demons...