View Full Version : What shoud I do continue or divorce
agentkramr
Aug 18, 2008, 06:17 PM
Let me explain the whole situation before I get to asking my question.
My wife and I split up about 8 months ago I didn't know we had split up until one of my friends at work approached me and had asked me if my wife and I are having problem because she had changed her status to single on myspace when I came home and asked her about this she screamed that people should mind there own business and then proceeded to tell me that she is leaving she moved in with her friend anglea whom I was pretty adimit about not wanting our 2 year old child around because this girl is a constant drug abuser thrives on cocaine and beer my wife has been with 3 other men that I know of since she has been gone she had a confilct with her friend and now she has moved back into our house everything was going good until I found out 1 day before my birthdat athat she was making plans to see some guy then there was a fight of all fights. Every time we have a fight she flips it around to that she is the victim and then I end up feeling bad for her because she is my wife and I love her so much and I just want our son to have a family that he deserves I guess I am asking what should I do I have prayed for 8 months for the return of my wife but I don't think I am getting an answer what should I do?
N0help4u
Aug 18, 2008, 06:33 PM
You need to write down days and time and what she does that could make her an unfit mother. Then when she tries taking off with your son get a temporary custody order that he is to stay at his home with you. File for full custody and do not let her in the house again.
You may love her (for whatever reasons) but apparently she does not love you and you need to face that fact. You can not make her love you, you can not make her be a good faithful loving wife, you can not make her be a responsible mom. So you need to put your full effort in getting custody of your son and let her do whatever as long as you don't take her back.
Your son doesn't need to grow up thinking women can leave to cheat or whatever anytime they want. That is no impression to leave on a kid.
twinkiedooter
Aug 18, 2008, 06:39 PM
She is obviously using you for whatever whim she has at the time. If she does leave the home, by all means do not pray for her return if she treats you so shabbily. You deserve better. If she does move out, file for divorce and bar her from returning to the home. At the same time you file for divorce ask for full custody of your son. Her choice of roommates leaves a lot to be desired and I am sure her new roommates will be of the same caliber as well.
BetrayalBtCamp
Aug 18, 2008, 07:50 PM
Unfortunately, your wife has decided she wants to party & that includes with other men. The best thing you can do right now is a 180 on her, which is to not let her think she can play all she wants while you continue to pay for it. She will not stop by you trying to talk logically or even emotionally to her until she is willing to listen to you. Right now, she is not.
There is a list of good info here that may help you deal with what is going on in a more constructive way & give you ideas on how to put together a gameplan for moving forward in the best way possible for you & your child. Your wife may still make it possible for you to reconcile, if you still want to by the time she wants that too. In the mean time, you have to make sure your child is safe & you are taken care of too, emotionally, physically & financially.
SurvivingInfidelity.com - Support for those affected by Infidelity (http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=161389)
I'm sorry you are going through this especially with such a young child, that's an ordeal no one should have to endure.
cali_grl
Aug 22, 2008, 05:04 PM
let me explain the whole situation before i get to asking my question.
my wife and i split up about 8 months ago i didnt know we had split up until one of my friends at work approached me and had asked me if my wife and i are having problem because she had changed her status to single on myspace when i came home and asked her about this she screamed that people should mind there own business and then proceeded to tell me that she is leaving she moved in with her friend anglea whom i was pretty adimit about not wanting our 2 year old child around because this girl is a constant drug abuser thrives on cocaine and beer my wife has been with 3 other men that i know of since she has been gone she had a confilct with her friend and now she has moved back into our house everything was going good until i found out 1 day before my birthdat athat she was making plans to see some guy then there was a fight of all fights. every time we have a fight she flips it around to that she is the victim and then i end up feeling bad for her because she is my wife and i love her so much and i just want our son to have a family that he deserves i guess i am asking what should i do i have prayed for 8 months for the return of my wife but i dont think i am getting an answer what should i do?
That is ridiculous.. im so sorry that this is happening.. to be honest with you its not our place to judge but to help you out... Think of your baby so far she has been growing up in a drug addicts house and a house where her parents continuously fight... I think you need to talk to your wife about a better living situation for your child... whether your wife gets help and the baby stays with you.. or you talk with either grandparents about a living situation with themm... I know what I'm talking about because my parents did that with me only I chose to leave when I got older and live with my grandparents because I had already fallen into drinking and cutting myself then I found God... idk if you have religious beliefs but I'm a christian and I have now such a beetter life.. if I stayed with my parents I would died or ran away...