avaanstar
Aug 18, 2008, 07:05 AM
I will not get a boyfriend in the future because I am not confident.
If a guy is checking me out, I'll ignore him. I'm not confident enough to wave or smile back. Also, I am very judgmental. If an African-American guy is checking me out, chances are I'll ignore him because I am ignorant. Yes, I'm half black so you may be wondering why I am so judgmental to my own race... well, I have grown in the suburbs and I tend to place black men in the same light. I do like black men who aren't the stereotype but often times, they are..
Whoa. I'm ignorant.
Please give me advice!
bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE
Aug 18, 2008, 07:20 AM
I think you have gotten pretty good advice from your previous posts.
When you have confidence in you, it shows. What do you like about yourself? It can be physical or emotional. I happen to love my smile and hair. I take pride in both and because of that, I shine.
It's okay not to like boys of your race. Who said you had to? There are no rules. Everybody has their own preference.
JBeaucaire
Aug 19, 2008, 01:20 AM
I'm no fan of blind stereotyping of whole race of people, but I am a HUGE fan of making proper judgments. If the black boys in your neighborhood all are losers, there is nothing wrong with knowing and admitting that. It is what it is, right?
But to be fair, you need to be that brutally honest about all the guys you evaluate. Most guys are on the way to being a great guy. That means they aren't there yet. So some will be losers because they are losers, others will be losers but clearly show promising traits, others are clearly almost there... and so on.
The trick will be to be fair in your evaluations. Rather than discount all black men, just discount the losers and do it quickly when you see them for what they are. But the guys that fall into the "almost there" category, hey, give 'em a chance, OK?
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Also, I stand by my previous posts to you on other topics. You are a pretty self-involved person. Based on your posts, you spend a lot of time thinking about yourself. (we're friends, I can talk straight to you, right?) I'm not going to tell you NOT to do that, since there's nothing intrinsically wrong with that, just try to be balanced. Life is ultimately going to be about what you give, not what you get.
The world really, REALLY doesn't owe you anything, and you will have to go out there and BE a great, deserving, ambitious productive person for good things to come to you. It's about you and what you are willing to DO with your life, and not just what you think about yourself.