Hello Help Desk, this is my first time on the site and I'm hoping you could help me with my problem:

I'm 14 years old and deeply smitten with an old English teacher (I say smitten because though it feels like love to me, I don't know if it's possible for a 14 year old to have the capacity to actually be in love with someone). He taught me two years ago, and thanks to a combination of him being an amazing teacher and an awesome person, I worked very diligently and excelled. I normally love my English classes and work hard to get good grades regardless of the topic and teacher, but this was special. He inspired me to do my very best and then some. And then there was also the fact that his praise meant the world to me, no matter if it was a lengthy comment or simply "nice transition".

Last year I saw him whenever I could, which was unfortunately only occasionally, despite my best attempts. This changed dramatically, however, when I heard devastating news: he was leaving the school. This led me to finding and relaying the news to one of my closest friends, at which point we went to find him him. Perhaps the worst part (not that it wasn't all completely horrid) was when I told him that I'd heard some very disturbing news about him. His joyous smile was suddenly replaced with a grave, serious look - one that I'd rarely, if ever, encountered - which told me before he did that yes, it was true, and I immediately began to cry (an act which was more or less continuous throughout the following week or so).

Seeing as how this question is already quite lengthy, suffice it to say that I did my best to be with him as much as possible and spent several nights perfecting a heart-felt card in which I did my best to convey to him how much he had impacted me and how much I cared for him. He wrote about a half page in my yearbook which he prepared over a weekend and still makes me cry whenever I read it.

Since then I've done everything possible to keep in touch with him, which currently means emailing him under the false pretense of getting book recommendations (of course whenever he gives me a title I immediately order it and feverishly read it, so as to be able to respond to him all the more quickly). The thing is, it's not enough. I find myself staring at pictures of him and listening to sad music. He's what I think about before I go to sleep, and is the source of my insomnia as I can't bear to stop doing so. And of course I'm always reminded of him, picturing him, looking for him wherever I go. And it hurts. A lot.

Which lead me (finally) to my question: what can I do? To just stop everything that has to do with him would be unimaginably painful, if even possible. Though if I don't stop now, when will I ever? I know this isn't healthy and that it's sick to be so obsessed with someone who could be my father, but what can I do?

reeses420 I think that you should go to the library and check out a book on teenage crushes. This is what I believe you are experiencing. You should gain some knowledge on this topic. If you can't get a book on teenage crushes then you should get one on teenage emotionsand you should get a book on What is love? This book should give to you the real meaning of what love is,the many different kinds of love there is in life that you may encounter as a teenager,for instance tough love. I think that you should forget about this teacher and guys right now, you should get involved in more school activies and clubs with other girls your age like for instance the school news paper would be good for you,and sports,joining or going to sports games with your friends or family.You need to do things that are going to help you drown out the memory of this teacher in your mind for good,and move on with your life.

You have some strong intense feeling, that you are going to have to cope with, I am afraid. The first thing you need to know is, that while it's nothing wrong with having those feelings, be very careful what you do about it.

Have some fun with friends, and explore the things that interest you, and be patient. If you do nothing, but live your life, and stop feeding the feelings, they will fade. Especially when something more interesting comes along.
Good Luck with your "growing pains".

That's something would happen when we grow up, but this will not last forever, you will grow up, and forget that teacher, and get to know what true love is, he is only somebody on the road when you grow up, concentrate on your study,school activities.