What options are there for an out of control 16 year old.

What options are there for an out of control 16 year old.
Please don't get offended by this question, but I must ask before I can give you a response. Are you black or white?

Not sure what black or white has to do with it unless you know some programs for specific races.
There is boot camp or scared straight.

It would be helpful if you could go into a bit more detail like are you married. If not is your 16 yr olds dad a part of their life? Is your teen a boy or a girl? What is their behavior that is over the top? Not following your rules? Smart mouthing? Drugs/alcohol/boys? Not going to school?

OK I am new to this site.I initially had put details into my question but somehow it did not post it... so here are the details..

My son is 16 years old. He was diagnosed with ADD when he was in first grade and has been on several different medications. The older he got the more aggressive he became.
It started around 8th grade when he starting goofing off and refused to do his school work and made the teachers uneasy. He was removed from the school and transferred to a special for troubled kids.. however the only problem he had then was concentrating on doing school work and talking back to the teachers... the school he was put in was with other kids that had hit there teacher or family members threatened their teacher or suspensions etc. It seemed that he started icking up bad habits from these other kids..
Next came high school he didn't get to go to the high school his twin sister attends,which really upset him... he was failing all his classes and didn't seem to care.. he was in therapy for awhile but he knew exactly what to tell the therapists. He loves sports but was never eligible for them due to his grades...
Now back to present... Because he is in special education due to his behavioral problems, he does not want to return to his school... he has issues with his spec ed teacher and refuses to go back there.Not only that, he has been in fights with other students because of his race(white)in a predominately black school. He has had 2 disorderly conduct tickets given at school and has been assaulted twice by two other students.
This is why we were looking into different schools but it did not pan out,which he is furious about.. even sending him out of state to live with my mother was going to be an option but I don't want to ut a burden on her.And because of this(he was looking forward to going)
His behavior at home has been really bad... he has threatened his sisters ages 19,16(twin) and 14. He has even hit his twin and left bruises on her several times.He argues with me on a daily basis and insults me... His dad works 3rd shift and is never at home when these outbursts take place.. when I tell him about them he talks with him about disrespecting me and his sisters... he is usually grounded ,privileges taken away(phone,video games,tv)but it doesn't matter he continues to do whatever he wants
He has stolen beer to drink with his friends and has left the house at night after his dad has left.My husband was abused as a child and finds it difficult to discipline him.
I think my son has other problems other than ADD but doctors have insisted that it is just the ADD and he is acting out for attention.How can I handle this situation.. I have threaten to send him away to a boys camp or something similar.. He says that he will come back when he is 18 and get back at me.

Hi there, I'm now 21 but from when I was about 12 till only 6 months ago I was just like this! It was like reading something my mother would write about me!! All the doctors thought I had add or adhd too, BUT they actuly found out I was bi-polor! I was put on the bi-polor meds about 6 months ago and since then I have done a full turn around! I was like him in theripy too, but after a few different doctors they seen through it, and worked out what was wrong

I had questioned the doctors "could there be anything else wrong with my son such as bipolar" they all said the same thing... just ADD/ADHD I don't see the hyperactivity as much. Some days he will have outbursts tell me to (you know what) off and then he will call me from work and say "hey can you bring me some lunch" and when I would refuse he would say"what did I do wrong" It's like he has a split personality... He is never depressed but I don't know all the details of being bipolar...

THAT IS JUST LIKE ME!! See the doctors did the same thing with me to, sometimes I think its easer for them to just not bother looking into it more! I would tell my mum the same thing, I once even through a axe at her! And a few hours later I would not even remember it and think nothing more of it! I would have really bad mood swings etc, one day I would be really happy and walk around 6miles to see friends and feel on top of the world, the next I would be so down I would not get out of bed and refuse to go to school!

I understand your plight. I, too, had a 16 yr old who was out of control, ADD, etc. The bipolar is probably true. I was ADD as a child (not a diagnosis then) but put on bipolar medications as an adult and am in love with life. The best thing my son's therapist told me was to let go. Let the natural consequences be the consequences. It's hard. Really hard. DON'T send him to any boot camp or camps for behavior problems. As you have seen, he just picked up more bad behavior from the other kids. More teachers told me to NOT send him to those type of camps.

I have no idea to give you about the hitting. If you can get him to take the bipolar medicine, please do. But get a psychiatrist to prescribe it. It is important for both of you to know it is a trial and error system. The first medication I tried was terrible. I told the doctor I would rather be depressed than to feel nothing. But keep at it.

Ignore the bad behavior as much as possible. Pray he doesn't hurt himself or anyone else and let the natural consequences teach him. My husband was the same - a bit uninvolved. But always let your son know you love him, but his behavior is hurting everyone.

Good luck. I'm so sorry you are experiencing this. It is a tough, tough battle. My son finally turned around. He's 21 and is a sous chef at an italian deli. He's a hard worker and his boss just loves him to death. He has finally become a responsible, honest and loving person. It'll happen. Keep praying.

I am still young with Add. Unfortunately I can not afford testing but my family knows I have it. Since I can't get medicine I can't do hw but I don't get MAJOR moodrwings. Anyway I know from experience it is not the add causing it I'm 100% sure.

Another thing. I didn't emphasize enough about the psychiatrist. Most ALL ADD children grow up to be bipolar adults. There have been hundreds of studies proving it. Keep going to different doctors. How many tests has he taken? Has he had a brain scan? Are you located in a small town, or can you get to major city or metropolitan area? Talk to your insurance company. If there isn't a child psychiatrist in the area, most insurers will allow you to find one out of the area.