Hi I was just wondering if anyone could give me some advice! I have a 2 year old little gilr and she is fantastic, she has slept through the night since the day she was born. For the past week or so she has been going to bed and falling asleep if me or daddy sits and holds her hand but then she wakes up every night at about 11- 11:30 and will not go back to sleep in her own bed. She starts screaming and throwing herself around, chucking herslef on the floor, banging her head on the wall.
She has a pretty normal betime routine as in bath, story cuddles with mummy/daddy, bed!
She doesn't sleep through the day because if she does she will not go to sleep until about 11 pm!
I have tried the tough love thing by walking away and letting her cry but she just comes out of her bedroom and climbs into my bed or stands at the top of the stairs shaking the babygate and whailing! I am frightened that one day she is going to seriously hurt herself!!
Please someone help me or give some different advice apart from walk away and let her cry because it doesn't work!:(

Put her to bed the reg time. The first time she gets out of bed tell her it is bedtime and walk her back to the bed. The next time she gets up take her back to bed without saying anything. Every time she gets up keep putting her back to bed. Do not talkk to her after the 1st time. She will get the idea you mean what you say. Tha more you rock or coddle or put up with the nonsense and then place her into your bed she will realize, hey if I do thhis I will get my way. Best wishes

Hi lisalost... unfortunately there is no easy solution to this, she obviously wakes, all is quiet and she gets a little frightened, realizing that you are not there.

Does she have a night light ? That can work wonders.

When she crys you are going to have to continually go to her, get her out of bed, give her a cuddle,check she's dry and doesn't need a drink, maybe read her a story, until she is calm enough to be put back to bed... don't take her into your room, which I imagine is what you do and of course is what she now expects.If she comes in go through the routine, take her back to her room cuddle her, sing to her or put on some quiet music or tell her a story she likes and put her back... don't do any of this in your room, has to be hers.

This will be hard and very tedious but will be worth it in the end when she will realize that she will not be getting into your bed... it will work but you will have to be very strong, especially if your tired, it will seem so much easier to just give in... don't... you'll have to start right from the beginning again.

Goodluck

Thanks for the adivce! I will try one way or the other and if that doesn't work I will try the other way!

I have been there I am still there actually me and my husband deal with this every night I didn't keep putting my 2 year old son in his bed and now 3-4 hours of him being a sleep he is on our bed and sleeps right between us if you don't want to sleep like that for ever there is one other way other than letting her lay there and screaming lay in her bed with her and wait till she is fast asleep and then go back to your room I wish I would have done it earlier once they get used to sleeping with you there is no braking it good luck

My almost 3 yr old is still sleeping with us! I have heard all of this advice that everyone else is giving you but honetly I'm like you. I don't think any of it works. What I think you should try ( & what I have tried) is puttin her bed in your room. Lay next to her on the floor & maybe rub her back or sing to her until you know she's asleep. You then go to bed. Get a night light so when she wakes up in the middle of the night she will see you & know she is safe. If she continues to wine & wants in your bed, try rubbin her back to sleep. This should work. It will get tiring but you have to do what works.. right?

Hi I was just wondering if anyone could give me some advice! I have a 2 year old little gilr and she is fantastic, she has slept through the night since the day she was born. For the past week or so she has been going to bed and falling asleep if me or daddy sits and holds her hand but then she wakes up everynight at about 11- 11:30 and will not go back to sleep in her own bed. She starts screaming and throwing herself around, chucking herslef on the floor, banging her head on the wall.
She has a pretty normal betime routine as in bath, story cuddles with mummy/daddy, bed!
She doesnt sleep through the day because if she does she wil not go to sleep untill about 11 pm!
I have tried the tough love thing by walking away and letting her cry but she just comes out of her bedroom and climbs into my bed or stands at the top of the stairs shaking the babygate and whailing! I am frightened that one day she is going to seriously hurt herself!!!
Please someone help me or give some different advice apart from walk away and let her cry cos it doesnt work!:(

Mine does the same thing more or less. She is 2 years old. I video taped it on my camera.. she throws herself on her bed, bangs her head on the bed.. laughing out loud.. it takes about 2 hours for her to go back to sleep.. I look into her face.. her eyes are open, but like in a trance state... as if she is asleep, but yet awake.. I think she is doing something similar to sleep walking, in her crib anyway.. its strange, she does it every night, just started doing it 1 month ago.. during the day time, everything is fine. Its only in her crib, at about 4am... when she sleeps with us, she makes it through the entire night, so I am going to get rid of the crib and put her on a bed near mine on the floor and see if that helps.. sounds like same thing though, I am thinking she is sleep walking, without the walking around part.

Here is a thought... sleep with one of her stuffed animals for a couple of nights and then give it to her to sleep with...

It will smell like mom and dad and may comfort her through the night...

My wife and I just put her bed in our room at first. You know across the room or whatever and convinced her it was OK and if she needed anything we were right there and it worked. Well we just recently moved to a bigger place with TWO bedrooms. So good o daddy has been moving her bed about 5 to 10 feet out of the room each night. So good so far I'm up to 30 feet. Almost to her room. She sleeps there all night. Well sometimes she has bad dreams I guess and comes in there and I will let her fall back to sleep put her back and kiss her on the forehead and go back to bed. This really seems to be working for us. I love my daughter sleeping with us since I work a late 2nd shift and I don't get to see her often but the wife don't and I know all couples need alone time and I love my daughter so that's why we came up with the slow but steady 10 feet plan. Hope this either helps or works.

I am sorry, if there is no issue, you put her to bed, and make her sleep there, who is the parent

There is an issue! She bangs her head on walls and floors and has at one point nearly come close to knocking herself out! I would look like a good "parent" when I ring a doctor or an ambulance and say I have just left her to bang her head because she won't go to bed! I would rahther find a different way like previous people have written! I don't want my daughter to feel neglected and unloved because that's what she will remember is me locking her in her bedroom! Anyway I asked for help not criticsm on my parenting!

I feel for you. My daughter is 9.5 years old. She sleeps in her own bed of course but this took some major doing. She was an only child, so therefore spoiled. When she was two I had a tubal pregnancy and lost the child. She became even more spoiled after this because we were told there would be no more kids. Anyway she was almost four when I found out quiet surprisingly that I was pregnant. She still had slept with us for almost four years, as she was breastfeed until one and it was sooooo much easier to just let her sleep with us as there were no bottles to be made in the middle of the night. Anyway, when I found out I was pregnant my husband and I decided that she needed to start sleeping in her bed regularly, we had been moving her after she passed out. There were so many nights that I wanted to scream because all she did was cry and cry. None of the head banging that you are talking about but kicking, hitting the walls all sorts of stuff. What we would do was put the bathroom light on, as it was in the hall and kept her room quite lit up. We would put her to bed about 7:30 after a book, hugs, kisses the whole bit. Then pray that she didn't sneak back out or start screaming. Some nights were good, others not so good but after a daily ritual of this for about a week the screaming started to slack off. I know it sounds like a long time. Then the hitting the wall got less and such as time went on. By the time her brother was born she always went to bed in her bed. Now I'm not saying that this is fool proof and that we never woke up in the middle of the night to her staring at our faces. (Happened several times.) Or that we didn't give in sometimes when she was screaming but it did eventually work. When my son was born he slept in his bed from the day he came home. We learned our lesson on that one. Not that we didn't want him to sleep with us or anything but it is a 'parent slip up' that takes way too long to rectify. To this day we still do the reading, hugs and kisses routine before bedtime and all three must be tucked in and kissed again before they will go to sleep. I hope that my story will help out in some way. I am not a professional only a parent that has experienced/still experiencing the long sleepless nights, scraps and bruises, the good days and the bad days.

I have a three y/o and a nineteen month old that both used to end up sleeping in my bed. What I did was get them their own super cool toddler beds (which I am guessing that you already have) and then when my oldest would wake up at the same time every night I would enter the room about ten minutes prior and laydown between their beds. When he stirred, I would hold his hand, he'd look over, make sure I was there and go back to sleep. That worked for me, the youngest was still a problem so I went to radioshack, bought a digital recorder, read Goodnight Moon, Harold and the Purple crayon and a few others to it, then would play that when I noticed him stir. It played for about 45 minutes, and he slept through the night because "mommy's here". Maybe one of those two will help

They are some cool ideas if she ever tries it again I will be certain to try them! She is not too bad at the minute fingers crossed.

My own daughter won't either. I let her go to sleep in my bed, then I put her in hey own bed about 1 hour after she goes to sleep

put her to bed the reg time. the first time she gets out of bed tell her it is bedtime and walk her back to the bed. the next time she gets up take her back to bed without saying anything. every time she gets up keep putting her back to bed. do not talkk to her after the 1st time. she will get the idea you mean what you say. tha more you rock or coddle or put up with the nonsense and then place her into your bed she will realize, hey if I do thhis I wil get my way. best wishes

This is one of the better ideas I think, this one and the idea about moving the bed/crib a few 5-10 feet at a time. About every one of my friends has kids and I know that only one of them has a hard time getting her daughter to go to bed. I've noticed that with her, her daughter will keep getting out of bed if she's still getting a reaction out of my friend. My friend will start yelling at her and every time. Well anyway, it seems to me as long as she's still getting a reaction out of my friend she will continue to get out of bed. When her husband puts her to bed he just says "it's time to go to bed." if she comes back out he just brings her back in there without saying much and she seems to stay in bed.

Hi,

I am going through everything that you were going through, its been going on now for just over 2 weeks, screaming, not staying in bed, throwing herself on the floor and having to sit with her for hrs until she would fall alseep only that when you moved to leave thinking she was sleeping she would wake up and then end up in our bed, we have both tried what we think is everything, I noticed that you have solved the problem, could you please tell me what you did?? Thanks

Sorry to let you down gillian but I am back to the same old thing! All I keep doing is taking her back to her bed but some nights I am so tired I don't even realise she is in my bed! All I want is for her to sleep all night in her bed. If I got a full nights sleep I wouldn't mind if she got up at 7! I am thinking of getting a sid put back on her bed then if it's a case of she is rolling out of her bed then she may stay in it if there is something there to stop her!

Quick question... Has she cut all her back teeth yet? Some children take longer than others... My son went through it around 2yrs old and went through that kind of routine. Check it out? If so you'll have to be patient some kids do have a hard time sleeping in this case.

If not, well I'd got for lots of patience and take fr_chuck's advice:o

Yeah she has all her teeth, a family memebr asked me that too. It is taking a lot of patience.

To be honest there are a number of ways to help a 2 year old get to sleep. We have tried everyone with varried success and failure. We have tried singing to her, allowing her to fall asleep with us, her mom and her in the same bed dad on the couch. Having her puppy (stuffed animal) and blanket always. She hasent slept in her room crib in 2 months or more... an we try usually she ends up in our bed. Even before we get there and normally there is only room for one of us my baby loves to sprawl! Tonight I have been trying the let her cry it out method... so I am sitting here letting her cry it out, this method sucks but it sometimes works, at least as much of other advice seen here... it all works and doesent all the time... good luck... gotta go I don't think the crying it out will work tonight. Got to try something else

Hon, are you totally and completely against cosleeping/sharesleeping? (simply letting him sleep in your bed)
Many parents (myself included) don't see any problems, short term or long term, of simply letting him be with you in your bed.

Obviously if this doesn't work for you that's fine :) I'm not saying you NEED to do this. This is just what worked for me and my daughter. It doesn't work for everyone. Just thought I would throw it out there.

I totally disagree with putting her bed in your room. She needs to learn to fall asleep in her own bed in her own room without mommy or daddy. Trust me my two year old daughter never had a problem going to bed and in her own room but after her dad and I separated and he moved out suddenly she only wanted to be with me in my bed. I gave in mostly because I wanted her to be with me and that was it she was hooked. I tried everything then someone told me about bringing her bed into my room so I did that and with all honesty that just made it worse when I tried to get her to go to bed in her own room it was hell all she wanted was to be with me in my room. So I enlisted the help of my mother so I wouldn't give in and just put her in her bed in her room alone and let her cry it out. And she is stubborn she would cry for almost an hour. So every 15mins I would go in calm her down and start again this went on for 3 or 4 nights until finally she realized I wasn't giving in and it would just be easier to go to bed without me. Now I can put her to bed at 8 read her a story and sing her a lullabye and she'd be out like a light and finally after months of her sleeping with me I finally had some peace and much needed time alone. So please Im begging you don't allow her to sleep in your room no matter what. Even if you have to lay on the floor beside her bed just do it in HER room. She needs to feel comfortable in her own room first then without you. Good luck and don't give up whatever you choose to do.
Melissa

Sorry but about cosleeping/sharesleeping that of course works if you don't want to make love to your husband or if your single good luck bringing home your date for his first sleep over. Lol Ya its fine to have them in your bed but then when you NEED them out there's no chance in hell. They will never understand that Mommy and Daddy NEED their special alone time. Hey it's a known fact sex is only a problem when someone isn't having it. A key to any healthy relationship and there are many keys I know but sex and just plain alone time with your other half is just as important as time together with your child so keep in mind what your sacrificing. Plus I knew a girl in middle school who slept in her parents bed her whole life but even at 14 she couldn't go to sleep overs or even stay in her back yard.. she had to be with one or both or her parents to fall asleep. Of course that's not everyone but something else to think about. You don't really know how it will effect them until its ALMOST too late.

Mellissa, its all a matter of preferance, not plain simple fact. My daughter slept in my bed until she was 5. because I wanted her to. She is now going to be 7 in October, and never had any problems sleepingin her own bed after I moved her out of mine. Some kids its not good for, some kids its fine. Its all about finding what works for your child.

I know many parents put a lot of stock in the cry it out method, and just letting them get used to it, and letting them go to sleep on their own. But it doesn't work for some parents.

Wow that's funny because I think I say of course that's not everyone and good luck whatever you choose. Of course we will have diff opinions that's what this is for to hear diff ideas that may help. I wasn't trying to personally insult you and sorry if I did. I said my peace hope it all worked out for you since its been 2yrs since original post. Hope everyone is sleeping well whatever bed your in. Im personally happy being able to roll over and either going back to sleep or make love to my husband without having to disturb my baby from her slumber and I don't know about anyone else but I def don't want my child in the same room when that's going on. Good night and good luck.

Why is it funny? I'm confused now. I know you said that.