Howdy do guyz,
(Married man) Okay so I met this guy @ my job we both work in the medical field I'm fairly young (25) he's 40 and for whatever reason we connect not like the young losers I've dated anyway going out spending lots of time together he tells me he's married sticky situation for me cause I'm not into the homewrecking biz but apparently the home was and is pretty demolish if you ask me anyway he's really into me says he loves me we've been dating for 4 mnths now but we've always known each other frm work (thug) my first love I'm his first love family and friends didn't want us together because I was (12) @ the time he was 15 yea I was pretty fast shhhh heehee anyway we been hooking back up since our 10 year break up the love is still there hasn't left feels even much stronger all is good BUT he's a "thug" you know in the streets all the time he's a DJ/promoter very popular so you know there's groupies and he's sexy as hell and is welled packed if you know what I mean the mans sexi okay and he knows it I've known him for a lonnnggg time I can tell now he's semi done with the playing games etc. But of course I'm NO dummy I never trust a man 100% we all know shyt happens so my question to you is who do I keep around I mean I can continue to have my cake and eat it to but I don't want to hurt feelings I like to keep it real and I'm not right now so I need help who do I keep around do I stay with the married man who I am extremely comfortable around in all ways and continue to see him although I know he's never going to leave his wife and be with me in the end and I have accepted that or do I stay with my first TRUE love who isn't really stable I mean come on people party but they don't do it forever which means he's not really stable but he does collect a check every mnth until the day that he dies (God forbid) but is that enough he's like my 2nd half he knows me more than I myself and like I said the love never died but I really really like the married man so who do I proceed with who do I train do I train this man to stop being a coward and leave his wife if that's not where he wants to be the rest of his life and convince him not to die unhappy or do I train this thug to grow up show him how to do things with more class show him things he never would have seen in the streets clubs etc. I know it sounds like I got some nerve but I'm very independent strong successful woman somehow I'm tangled in a string and I don't know which side to cut so help me if you can why don't you moochez

Girl I'm telling you right now, leave that married man alone, not because you're a homewrecker or because he is married but because every woman deserves to be put "first" in any relationship. Lets face it even (if) he were to leave his wife, he will always have obligations to her. Right? Emotionally, finacially or whutever so? check it out stay friends with him and enjoy the emotional connection or what ever it is that you all have on a friends only basis. Thus, you will never feel like you are allowing yoourself to be put second. And I'm pretty confident that I don't have to tell you, if he did it to her he'd do it to you. You have a pretty good head on your shoulders so don't settle for less than what you deserve. When you make this decision known to him, watch how quickly things are "getting better" in his marriage or how shady he starts acting. Oh yeah, about the thug, hold on to the good times and cherrish the memories babe cause you isn't going to change anyone especially not his kind. You know they have to change on there own. So, my advice woman let him go emotionally unless he comes at you with some extraordianry proposal or something! (highly unlikey) but until that happens, if you are feeling lonely girl love and pray to GOD that he puts in your path what or who was meant to be there because the fact that you asking for advice says you have been stuck in a spot with this one for too long for that "something" that he has over you and that he knows he has over you. Let it go, stop questioning wuts rite and do what is rite. I know Iknow, what the hell do I know he is, was your true love. So, if it was meant to be than it will be and I really hope it works out to your benefit, but for real, I really don't even need to tell you do I? Hope it was helpful, speeking from experience in both matters, Sincerely, natasblue

Married means HANDS OFF! No matter how "bad" his marriage is, it is not your place to get involved. Walk away.

Your saying all the things I has already in my mind thanks much just needed to hear someone else tell me the same I guess I just like the excite of both parties lol I'm such a lame right heehee honestly I see neither of them in my future so I'm living in the moment right now tryna figure out which one do I continue to play with knowing that I'll be kicking him to the curb in no time hey pass no judgement it is what it is the men do it all the time 2 wrongs don't make a right but when I find that one that REALLY makes that differnce I'll b @ my best in etting that man feel like he should lol I being a bit a "whore" right now. But don't get it twisted I got the wifey material down pack held a man down for 9 n half years I LEFT HIM cause I know my worth I will never TRULY settle for less thanks for your input will higly take it into consideration Definitely your typing doesn't go unseen over here lol muah thanks much again!!

Leave them both alone. Then find someone that wants the same as you and ready for the s ame things as you. Then you can truly be happy.

Sounds like he has at least three strikes against him but if you are going to go with him you need to leave it [him] alone for now and let him get divorced. That way no body can come back at you that it was your fault for the marriage falling apart no matter how bad it was anyway.

Sorry to say this but you need to keep your HANDS & FEET to yourself.