Hi I'm ambyr I have a boyfriend [adrian] who I've been going out with for 5 years... we've been through a lot and I love him so much nothing got in our way until now... we love outdoor events like concerts and such my best friend [kristi] travels with us.. I came to suspect that adrian and kristi are more then just friends they disappeared at this white stripes concert... after the concert I found them at our hotel room in bed together.. I was heartbroken when I saw this but I still love him and I don't want to let him go.. a few weeks ago I took him back and we never talked about it... I cry when I think about that day but he's the only person that makes me smile and laugh. I want to know if I right chioce taking him back

This guy has no respect for you. It seems that he wanted you to find out if he's going slept with her in your hotel room. Ignore this as if it never happen will not erase it from your head. How many other time has this happen before you caught them and if you didn't catch how many other times would they have been? Did you remain friends with your so called best friend as well?

Note, if he could cheat on you with her who knows who else he could cheat on you with. Also, your friend was not your true friend if she slept with him. Both of them was wrong and share the blame and shouldn't forgive one and not the other if you plan on keeping him. I say leave because you must have doubts if your question your decision. You deserve better and you can find someone else that would make you laugh and smile and not cheat on you but cherish you.

Just because you don't talk about it doesn't mean it didn't happen, or couldn't happen again with either her or someone else.

Blissful denial, or blind faith?? Neither is real or healthy.

You never forget, and your never the same again. Your always wondering... is he?


Your best bet is to leave him, he already left you...

Meet some new friend/s.

Meet a new guy.

You don't need any of them. They both did you dirty and with a friend like this you don't need enemies. Let the two of them get together since they had no problems doing it before. Their both losers.

[QUOTE=tolerance]This guy has no respect for you. It seems that he wanted you to find out if he's going slept with her in your hotel room. Ignore this as if it never happen will not erase it from your head.

I agree, you can't just ignored the problem but face it. You must face your boyfriend for what he is. A cheater that didn't mind bedding your friend in the room you and him shared at the hotel. Then your friend for being slezzy and slepping with him. Did they think they were not going get caught? Maybe they did not care, no they did not care. Shame on them both. Give them the boot.

GUTS. GUTS. GUTS.

You've got to have it.

if you don't face the pain and go forward, the temporary relief you find by emotionally cheating and returning to an old lover, will take you backward -
away from the person you are SUPPOSED to be with.

It's not easy, but if you let us get you through it, you will find a MUCH better guy.

This relationship is not going to make it all the way... heck, you didn't even talk about his cheating on you.


Walk away. It'll make your life better. GUARANTEED.

If it hurts you to not talk about it, then you need to. You should really just sit down one night and let him have it. Tell him how much it hurt you. Ask him if he can assure you that it'll never happen again. Then don't bring it up again. Because if you can't forget it and move on it'll never work. You can't make him pay for his mistake over and over again or you'll drive him away. Let me ask you... Are you still friends w/ Kristi? And if you aren't, why not? Are you willing to forgive him and not her? All too often the person that the boyfriend slept with is the only one who is seen as being wrong. "How could she?..." But in reality, HE' s just as wrong as SHE is. Good Luck!

I really don't know what to say about this.. im in the same scenario, but I didn't take him back instead. I wonder if I did the right thing, and its times like this that I read posts about good girls who get done wrong.. over and over.. as heartbroken as I am, and ill be honest, I'm jealous, at least you have him back again.. I just could never be in that cycle forever... please move on, but take your time, and hell, use him! He's used you, and when you're ready to move on, dump his as.s and as for your friend, dump her as.s too.

If he has done it once he will do it again and if he has enough balls to cheat on you with your best friend the sky is the limit to who he will go to next... get rid of him and find someone that cares about you

He ditched you at a concert to have sex with your friend, time to move on.

I really dont know what to say about this..im in the same scenario, but i didnt take him back instead. i wonder if i did the right thing, and its times like this that i read posts about good girls who get done wrong..over and over..as heartbroken as i am, and ill be honest, im jealous, at least you have him back again..i just could never be in that cycle forever...please move on, but take your time, and hell, use him! he's used you, and when you're ready to move on, dump his as.s and as for your friend, dump her as.s too. thank you I did exactly that it turns out she was pregnant

thank you i did exactly that it turns out she was pregnant

Now, that should actually make it easier for you to move on. Here's why If Kristi keeps the baby, they will have a lifelong commitment with each other as parents. She will contantly in your business and a life time of drama to look forward to. Sounds fun, don't it. Get back to doing things with FAITHFUL friends, family. I wish you the best.

I agree with the others. It hurts you so much that you go and take him back but isn't it going to hurt more that he cheated and may very likely keep cheating? If not with her with others. You should respect yourself more. Why settle for less! Why be so needy that you have to have a cheater and very likely doesn't have 'enough of what it takes' type love for you. You deserve somebody that loves you back.

He needs to step up to being daddy and being responsible to her and their baby. You do not need a guy that already will have to pay child support for the rest of his life. Find someone FOR YOU!

No to be dense here ambyr, but did you move on?

thank you i did exactly that it turns out she was pregnant

I'm glad you left. Don't look back! I have my ex texting me all the time trying to be involved in my life, but hey, he made his decision, and we did too! But in the right direction! =)

I still hurt but its okay. All of the people here are here to help -girls like us- good girls done wrong- to wake up and see there are better guys out there!

you're not alone!
=)

im glad you left. dont look back!! i have my ex texting me all the time trying to be involved in my life, but hey, he made his decision, and we did too! but in the right direction!! =)

i still hurt but its okay. all of the people here are here to help -girls like us- good girls done wrong- to wake up and see there are better guys out there!!

you're not alone!!
=) I'm just so mad now to think they kept this from me for a whole year.. but at least I've moved on.. that baby thing really killed my love for him

Did I deserve this somehow? When I looked back I think people knew but didn't tell me.. I think they did it more then once too which hurts when I think about it I don't know what to do now.. I always thought we could go through anything and survive.. even this (signs) even this

Don't get mad at others. Most often when something like this happens others don't tell you because they don't know where to put their loyalties, they don't want to get in the middle, end up with one or all hating them and they don't want to be put in the middle.
Also often when people do tell the one that is being cheated on is in denial and calls them liars, they stick up to no end for the cheater and they end up blaming and hating you for making them aware of something they didn't want to face.

Well I'm not mad at others I'm mad at myself for letting this happan.. what did I do wrong? We did everything together when other girls look at him I really didn't mind.. maybe he got bored of me

Maybe it is best you found out when you did many girls end up marrying the cheater and THEN finding out.

Thank god that didn't happen I don't what I would do if I found out like that

Forget about this loser! He is the one who lost out, not you

I know it's easier said than done. But don't EVER in a situation where the guy is cheating (and ecspecially when it's your best friend) ask yourself... "What did I do wrong?" You loved, you trusted. And there's nothing wrong w/ that. We all do it and at some point in time it comes back to bite us in the #ss. But you keep on keepin' on because one day, every hurt will be worth it. You may not realize it now. But there are some bad things that have happened to me by men and I really feel nothing towards those experiences anymore. Yeah, it sucked but I am where I am now because of them. But you don't stand back and look at this situation where he's cheating on you and ask what did I do? It's got nothing to do w/ you. It's got everything to do w/ him and what a pathetic %ss he is for not being man enough to tell you the truth :)

Right right its good to know I'm not the only one who went through this.. well actually that kind of makes me feel better

Dear friend remember when he did this decietful act its like a scar like the one on your body, that you will never be able to forget but only time and trust can heal, also remember if you forgave him and he's sincere about what transpired and he promises he won't do it again, then don't bring it up again but if you can't trust him and that scar re-opens DO NOT TAKE HM BACK AGAIN!!

This thread is from August 2008.