Justwantfair
Jul 30, 2008, 06:52 AM
Illinois
I went back to court yesterday to fight to modify custody of our daughter. My ex-husband has retained his previous attorney for the case and she will be filing a modification for custody on his behalf... I wonder if she can use retailiation as a reason :) I had planned on fighting this case pro se, I feel that it is pretty clear cut to me the reasons I need full custody. We are unable to make decisions together for her benefit, and the decisions he makes are based on his needs, not hers.
Example 1: Last year we had decided on her elementary school because the elementary school for his residence is a year round school. Since his neighborhood school started two weeks before the registration dates for the school we choose, he made a unilateral decision and he enrolled her in his neighborhood school under the premise that she was not registered anywhere yet. My daughter spent two weeks attending a school that she was not supposed to be attending.
Example 2: My daughter had strep throat, there are many irrational decisions made during this including not wanting her to go to the doctor while she was running a fever of 103.9 because walk in clinic doctors do not know what they are doing and will just throw antibiotics at her. He thought that she was misdiagnosed for having strep throat. Told me I was over medicating her (although I was following the bottle and the nurse) to keep her out of my hair (?? Anyone who knows a sick child they are a lot calmer unmedicated than medicated). The doctor recommended warm saltwater gargles, he comments she will like that she loves gargling with Listerine... and purchased a bottle of Listerine for my house.
Example 3: We agreed that she would attend summer day camp with her older brother every other week during the summer which he said would work out well for him because of the new infant at his house and my daughter doesn't get as much attention. After her first week of attending he decided (unilaterally again) that she would not be able to go back. After mediation we had 6-7 rewards to her going and his make believe risk that she was not being attended. My daughter has been very much upset about not being able to go back to day camp.
I know that my heart is in the right place, I know that I am making these decisions with her best interest in mind. He knows that she has wanted to go back to camp and justifies his decision by telling her that it's not her choice, it's the choice of me and him. I wasn't involved in that choice, I don't want her to believe I had any responsibility for breaking her heart. Do I continue to fight pro se, I know that I have ample examples of why joint custody is not suitable, or will I just get buried in a legal system that exploits poor parents?
I went back to court yesterday to fight to modify custody of our daughter. My ex-husband has retained his previous attorney for the case and she will be filing a modification for custody on his behalf... I wonder if she can use retailiation as a reason :) I had planned on fighting this case pro se, I feel that it is pretty clear cut to me the reasons I need full custody. We are unable to make decisions together for her benefit, and the decisions he makes are based on his needs, not hers.
Example 1: Last year we had decided on her elementary school because the elementary school for his residence is a year round school. Since his neighborhood school started two weeks before the registration dates for the school we choose, he made a unilateral decision and he enrolled her in his neighborhood school under the premise that she was not registered anywhere yet. My daughter spent two weeks attending a school that she was not supposed to be attending.
Example 2: My daughter had strep throat, there are many irrational decisions made during this including not wanting her to go to the doctor while she was running a fever of 103.9 because walk in clinic doctors do not know what they are doing and will just throw antibiotics at her. He thought that she was misdiagnosed for having strep throat. Told me I was over medicating her (although I was following the bottle and the nurse) to keep her out of my hair (?? Anyone who knows a sick child they are a lot calmer unmedicated than medicated). The doctor recommended warm saltwater gargles, he comments she will like that she loves gargling with Listerine... and purchased a bottle of Listerine for my house.
Example 3: We agreed that she would attend summer day camp with her older brother every other week during the summer which he said would work out well for him because of the new infant at his house and my daughter doesn't get as much attention. After her first week of attending he decided (unilaterally again) that she would not be able to go back. After mediation we had 6-7 rewards to her going and his make believe risk that she was not being attended. My daughter has been very much upset about not being able to go back to day camp.
I know that my heart is in the right place, I know that I am making these decisions with her best interest in mind. He knows that she has wanted to go back to camp and justifies his decision by telling her that it's not her choice, it's the choice of me and him. I wasn't involved in that choice, I don't want her to believe I had any responsibility for breaking her heart. Do I continue to fight pro se, I know that I have ample examples of why joint custody is not suitable, or will I just get buried in a legal system that exploits poor parents?