Hi I have reason to believe that my boyfriend of 1 year may be cheating on me.He always answers his phone and walks away and 1 day I went and looked and there were a lot of calls from Stacy. How do I find out for sure?

Ask..

Women are usually right when they believe boyfriend is cheating. Get rid of him

Ask him who Stacy is.

He's never going to be honest enoug or smart enough to answer that question

We don't know who's that lady yet is... say like "You know Im 'bothered' with those calls from Stacy, who is she?".

we dont know whos that lady yet is...

Pardon?

I'm not a big fun of assumption. If I were her, I'll ask directly and if Im not contented with the answer that's when I secretly investigate and confirm.

You need to ask who stacy is, and why he feels he can't talk to her on the phone while your there. Tell him that you aren't assuming he is cheating, but he is REALLY making it look like it. This needs to be addressed. And if they are just friends, ask to meet her. If she is important enough to him to talk to her all the time.. its worth the investment to meet her.

THEN you can see their body language, and see if there is some attraction going on there.

I have asked him who she is but he just said an old friend. Does that mean they were dating or were they really just friends. I am going to ask him to invite her over. Thanks for the ideas

Ask him to explain what his definition of "old friend" means. Yes invite her over, if says no.. Then something would be up... wouldn't it.

invite her over, if says no.. then something would be up... wouldnt it.

Agreed-

Personally I don't think she would be popping up on his call list that much if she was strictly just a friend, old friend's catch up every now and then, not all the time. Go with your gut. Not enough evidence now, but there is definitely something fishy going on. Suggest you guys could all grab a drink or something, play it cool at first , like it's not even phasing you, and see how he reacts, like if he goes off and is all weird about it "why do you want to meet her, you dont trust me etc" then you know he is covering up something. If he is totally cool with you guys meeting, then maybe she really is just a friend.

I suggest you ask him.. but he's probably going to lie.. from my experience, every time my gut was telling me something was wrong, it turned out to be right... listen to your gut.. if it's telling you he's cheating then he probably is..

I will advise you like I do my children. Go with your first mind. Never second guess yourself and your gut instinct. It won't steer you wrong.

Strange that he feels he needs to be away from you to talk to her, is it every time she calls?

I've never been on either side of the fence in a situation like this but I would think being the cheater you would be a little more discrete about it, i.e. not answering the phone at all when you are around and she calls

My ex was very paranoid and nosy when it came to my phone, at least 2-3 times a week she would browse my text messages and call history, so I guess if for some ridiculous reason I ever felt it was right to cheat in a relationship I would be covering my tracks, which it sounds like he is not doing

That's my two cents, not really direct feedback to your situation, but maybe something to chew on

Thanks for the ideas but I just decided to get rid of him because I read a text message from her that said I want you now.

Sorrie Frito. At least you figured it out. You will find better guys who will respect and honor you. Good luck!

thanks for the ideas but i just decided to get rid of him because i read a text message from her that said i want you now.

This could mean a lot of things, have you discussed it with him yet?

Please feel free to start another thread...

I want you now... I doubt it means she wants him to go over and fix her computer or play a video game. She was probably after him and he fell right into her trap. Dump him he has excess baggage.

I want you now....I doubt it means she wants him to go over and fix her computer or play a video game. She was probably after him and he fell right into her trap. Dump him he has excess baggage.

Your always giving advice to just drop the relationship and start new, why?

There is such thing as loyalty and trust, Its wiser to discuss matters first then assume.

Sure she can talk to him but does that mean he will be honest?
He could very likely just get more secretive. Of course if she feels it is worth waiting to see if he gets involved with her or is innocent that is fine.

Your always giving advice to just drop the relationship and start new, why?

There is such thing as loyalty and trust, Its wiser to discuss matters first then assume.

I think she is like me, and seen so much BS in relationships, you get to a point of why waste time trying to ride a dead horse. When loyalty and trust is broken, time to go!!

If my man has been good to me all throughout our relationship and just made that one but big mistake, maybe I'll just consider my relationship as "riding in a horse confined in veterinary ICU"- I may or may make it forgive. But ill try to give it a shot (If he shows an extreme efforts to be forgiven).

"i want you now" is pretty cut and dry when I read it... only reason I could ever see a girl sending me a message like that is if I was heavily flirting with her or even messing around with her... I think you made the right decision

Ask him but if he don't awnerser the question then you may be right I had a boyfriend who did that and I got rid of him and I don't regret it