Does anyone know a free website that locates people? Just a name search or a free police record search? I'm looking for someone in PA...

I found a few people on LookupAnyone.com It is not free, but they only charge $1.95 for phone number and address. It helps if you know the person's full name and age.

Great thanks, and yes I know their full name and age... but no credit cards lol. I'll look around.

Did you look at the site? I'm not sure that it has to be a credit card. Maybe you can use a paypal account? Or maybe you could get a friend or relative to help you? Good luck!

I don't know of any except for the white pages. I found a lot of my friends through the social networks myspace and Facebook. As for a direct phone number and address, I am still researching. If you find a website that is free please let me know. Thanks!

Thanks everyone, and ANB428 I've tried myspace and Facebook but they do not have an account which is crazy because everyone does! Lol thanks and if I find something I will let you know!

Is it possible for you to supply his/her name? I will help search for you?

Sure! His name is Robert Richard Hurt.. he should be 37-38 yrs. Old. Last anyone knew he resided in PA somewhere... he also grew up in Florida. Some people also have told me that he was in a jail or prison in Georgia, not sure how true that is though... thanks and I appreciate it!

You also might want to click on the results of the following search on the link below. Usually, the ages on that site are listed about a year older than the person actually is. I don't know why.

PeopleFinders.com | People Summary (http://www.peoplefinders.com/summary.asp?fn=Robert+&mn=R&ln=Hurt&city=&state=PA&age=&dobmm=&dobdd=&doby=&vw=people&Input=name&x=32&y=7)

Concerning court records that might be available online in the Pennsylvania area, you might want to try the following search.

Pennsylvania Court Records Online - Google Search (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&safe=off&q=Pennsylvania+Court+Records+Online)

Sure! His name is Robert Richard Hurt.. he should be 37-38 yrs. old. Last anyone knew he resided in PA somewhere... he also grew up in Florida. Some people also have told me that he was in a jail or prison in Georgia, not sure how true that is though...thanks and I appreciate it!



There's one born in July 1970 in Key Largo, Florida, also one in Chambersburg, Pa - who appears to be the same person.

Yes Judy I think that's him!! And I just double checked with my Mom and she said that he did grow up in Key Largo Florida.

I have been wanting to get ahold of him, as he is my biological father who I have never met... him and my mom weren't together for long. I have no idea what I would say though. I searched in Yahoo! Phone book online and there was only one phone number that came up with his name, but I got the answering machine and it sounded like an old man... and my mom also heard the machine and she said it wasn't him.

I have been wanting to get ahold of him, as he is my biological father who I have never met... him and my mom weren't together for long. I have no idea what I would say though. I searched in Yahoo! phone book online and there was only one phone number that came up with his name, but I got the answering machine and it sounded like an old man... and my mom also heard the machine and she said it wasn't him.



The one born in 1970 has an unlisted number; someone with a similar name (and previously same address, possibly his father) does have a listed number.

Perhaps you reached the father - ?

That may be true... could you give me that number? I will try to call him and ask for my dad

In the first link that I had given you in the answer that I had provided, there were also other locations where that person may have lived or is living in confirmation and in addition to the places that have already been mentioned on this thread.

I would advise you to tread with much caution here though. If he is your biological father and was aware that you are his child, then why hasn't he made any efforts to see you? Was he even aware that you are his child?

I don't want to "burst your bubble" here. But, you all of a sudden appearing in his life in whatever way, may set up a scenario of you getting hurt emotionally, and I would hate to see that happen.

If you could find some people that knew him and know what your father knows about any children that he has fathered, then I would suggest approaching them first before directly contacting your father.

I don't think that we have then entire picture as to what the whole story is as far as you coming to be in this world and also being able to get the information as to your father is. It would help us to help you the best if you would tell us the whole story about it.

Thanks!

Well lets see... My mother and him only dated for a short time, she got pregnant. He knows he has a daughter somewhere... theres no doubt about that. She has told him about me when I was a baby, and when I was 3 or so I met him and he said "shes getting big" to my Mother. All I can rely on is my Mothers word as far as his name or what he looked like. My Uncle lives in Florida right now and has his whole life and grew up with my father and has mutual friends from the past and that's where I found out he moved to PA. She never got him for child support or anything because I guess back then in Florida if a parent pays child support, that gives them the right to take the child whenever they please and my mom wasn't about to let that happen. I do not know of any other children he may have fathered or is fathering because no one in my family talks to him... when I was 3 like I said, my family told me he went to jail... and I guess has moved up to PA in the 20 years I've been alive. I'm not scared of being emotionally hurt, I'm expecting the worst. I am expecting him to not return my letters, not answer the phone, have no contact at all. But that's fine. I've got this long without knowing what he looks like, sounds like, smells like, everything. Even if I just get the information about him, or know where he's living right this minute, then I'm more than satisfied and will contact him maybe. Whenever I feel like I'm up for it. :) Thanks everyone, I have a tendency of leaving everything personal out when I post!

Robert & Patricia Hurt
1382 Lakeshore Dr
Chambersburg, PA 17202-9488
Phone number unavailable
Age: 35-39

Hope this helps.

He has also resided in Dry Run, PA. I will have more information for you a bit later.

Okay thank you oh so very much! I appreciate it!

Were you able to find a phone number, Gem?

I, as of yet, have not found a phone listing for a Robert or Patricia Hurt. Also, he seems not to have any police record.

Then I don't think it's the right guy... Everyone has told me that when I was basically first born he went to prison. And some of my family heard he was incarcerated in Georgia also. Maybe he got his record cleaned up? Or it just might not be him at all... thanks anyway!

Then I don't think it's the right guy... Everyone has told me that when I was basically first born he went to prison. And some of my family heard he was incarcerated in Georgia also. Maybe he got his record cleaned up?? Or it just might not be him at all...thanks neways!


Can't find a record for him in Georgia but he has an arrest of some sort (could be traffic) in the computer system in Pennsylvania - if his birth date is February 1960. No current address or phone number.

Past address in Middletown, PA.

Judy: 1960 is too old. My Mom is 37, and he was around her age. Either 37 or a year older 38. Thanks though. I'm going to try writing it anyway... maybe its his brother or a cousin, or something.. what would I say in the letter?

Pennsylvania list only one criminal record for a Robert Hurt (DUI)(1991) As mentioned by JudyKayTee.
No criminal records for any combination of Robert (Bob) Hurt listed in Georgia or Florida unless I missed seeing them.

But last anyone knew or heard, he lived down south for years after I was born in 1988. Oh well I'm going to write him a letter and hope its him, but not get too personal just in case it isn't him... thanks guys

Just mailed out a letter! Hope its him!!

just mailed out a letter!! hope its him!!!


Will you come back and let us know? I'm always curious how things work out.

Without a lot of detail, what did you say? I don't think I'd have any idea where to begin!

"Hi Dad -" and then I'd rethink that!

Lol I'm so nervous, but I'm glad I did it, and I hope its him! My luck it won't be him though... but anyway, I just said I'm looking for my bio. Father and my mothers name is... and my dad had blondish hair back when I was born, and if you aren't him, sorry for wasting your time and if u ARE him I would love to meet and speak to you. Please respond back!

Good luck. We'll be waiting for an update!

Thanks!

Just to check in with everyone... I have found a total of 3 addresses for my biological father, and sent a letter to each one, hoping to find him or get my letter forwarded to his new address or something. Thanks everyone for your help..!

Just to check in with everyone... I have found a total of 3 addresses for my biological father, and sent a letter to each one, hoping to find him or get my letter forwarded to his new address or something. Thanks everyone for your help...!!



Keep us informed - this must be both exciting and frightening for you, all at the same time!

Definitely judy. I'm finding myself checking the mail everyday when usually I don't... but there's nothing coming... :((

Geeeeeez, 3 days and still no answer... usually takes about 2 days from NY to PA UGH!
Anybody know how many days it takes for a letter to get forwarded if the recipient has moved?

Geeeeeez, 3 days and still no answer... usually takes about 2 days from NY to PA UGH!
Anybody know how many days it takes for a letter to get forwarded if the recipient has moved?


Well, either it gets delivered and is marked "Not at this address" and returned to the Post Office and then they sort of re-mail it and it takes however many days to get to the new address OR the Post Office gets it and re-mails it and, again, so many days to the new address.

I would think that the fact that it hasn't come back to you might be good news, although if it's 2 days in each direction it's hard to tell.

I would also think if you did locate your father it will be a shock to him and he may need a day or two to absorb it and decide just what to say when he contacts you.

Hang in there.

Okay Judy guess what!? I work at my moms store/restaurant, and we were just sitting around talking about my real dad... and the store phone rings... I run and answer it and this guy asks for my mom, and I ask "may i ask whos calling" and he says ROBERT. Me not thinking anything was like "ok hang on a sec". She finds out who it is, and ITS MY FATHER! He got the first letter I sent..! We exchanged numbers and he said he would call me later tonight! Thanks so much

Okay Judy guess what!???????? I work at my moms store/restaurant, and we were just sitting around talking about my real dad...and the store phone rings... I run and answer it and this guy asks for my mom, and i ask "may i ask whos calling" and he says ROBERT. Me not thinking nething was like "ok hang on a sec". She finds out who it is, and ITS MY FATHER! He got the first letter I sent...!!!! We exchanged numbers and he said he would call me later tonight! thanks so much


Oh, wow - this gave me goosebumps, it really did.

And it sounds like it's going to go well.

You must be THRILLED!

Oh, this is exciting - keep us updated. And congratulations - on persisting and being open to contact. A lot of people end up with chips on their shoulders or anger toward the father and do nothing but stew.

Excellent news! (wow, I'm excited, too!)

Wow... I'm so excited for you! This is great news. Good luck with the first phone conversation. Keep an open mind... don't try to make him match up with the man you have created in you head... be open to who he is. Over time you will find the relationship that works for both of you.

Congratulations! Let us know how it goes.

It was so odd feeling you know? My step father isn't too happy. He wasn't thrilled to find out he actually called me. I think he just thinks my bio. Father is going to somehow replace him but that would NEVER happen. And yes, thanks jjwoodhill... I'll keep what u said in mind!!

And Judy- I was shaking like a leaf! And the letter I sent him I didn't leave my phone number so he went to the trouble to research my moms store number! So that means he trying and he cares, right??

Since you mentioned your stepfather... Try to understand how he would feel. Now would be a good time to sit down and write him a note thanking him for all he has done for you. Tell him that you love him and that you could never replace him and would never want to replace him. Remind him that there are a lot of reasons that you want to meet your father, but that you know that he (your stepfather) made the choice to be your Dad.

Okay so he called me back because I sent him a text asking him if he had an email address which he gave me... I sent him a lot of pics of when I was a baby.. I don't have many pics from my childhood, sadly. But he said he had to coach football practice and that was at 6, he said he would call me afterward. He also said that he remembers my Mom, and that this is very overwhelming for him, well duh! Of course!

One of my friends said I should get him for back child support.. .

Okay so he called me back because I sent him a text asking him if he had an email address which he gave me... I sent him alot of pics of when I was a baby..I dont have many pics from my childhood, sadly. But he said he had to coach football practice and that was at 6, he said he would call me afterward. He also said that he remembers my Mom, and that this is very overwelming for him, well duh! of course!!

one of my friends said I should get him for back child support. ....



Depending on your age you may not be able to go after him for child support - that is something your mother should have done a long time ago. I don't believe, in fact, that in NYS you even have legal standing. Your mother would have to do it.

I think I'd shy away from this whole thought - this is why men contacted years later either refuse to have contact or drop contact, the fear that their lives will be upset if not emotionally, financially.

Judy do you know of a place to get a paternity test? He will step up and be a father figure to me, but in the back of his head he may have some doubts whether in the short time him and my mother were together, if there was possibly another man involved. I just want to set his doubts at ease...

Judy do you know of a place to get a paternity test? He will step up and be a father figure to me, but in the back of his head he may have some doubts whether or not in the short time him and my mother were together, if there was possibly another man involved. I just want to set his doubts at ease...


Many blood labs will do them - Family Court also has a list.

I've never dealt with any that aren't Court ordered but I do know I've been in Court when Attorneys have advised people NOT to use home testing kits or on-line sites.

To put everyone's mind at ease the test should be supervised, make sure it's actually the man you've contacted on one end and you on the other.

(How's that for a non answer?)

Yeah, he mentioned a home test.. how do those work? I read somewhat about them... but I don't understand if I have to buy one, and swab my mouth and send it back, and then he's got to buy another one and do the same thing?? I just want to go on maury or something! Lol I don't know...

Yeah, he mentioned a home test.. how do those work? I read somewhat about them... but I dont understand if I have to buy one, and swab my mouth and send it back, and then hes gotta buy another one and do the same thing??? I just wanna go on maury or something !! lol idk...


Yes, you buy and swab. He buys and swabs. You both mail. In a nutshell.

If you go on Maury, let me know and I'll come along as your cousin - or something. We'll wear matching outfits.

Haha ru serious? I'd def. do it!

Everyone on my side is saying we look alike and have the same nose, and forehead but my "dad" called me last night and said that he doesn't want to meet me or introduce me to his children until we're 110% that we're father/daughter... which is understandable because I can imagine how hard it would be for young kids to understand something like this...

He wants us both to buy an at home paternity test, the same brand, and he said he'll get around to it, and that he's busy, and that Ive waited 20 years, what's another couple days or weeks!? I had a loss for words when he told me this and I said, "EXACTLY! I've waited 20 years! U need to put it on ur priorities list"!

Idk how to feel... I just don't want to have doubts, and I don't want him too. My mom swears up and down that he was the only one in the picture back then, and I believe her. Also, he is the only one all my family has ever mentioned...

Be patient with him... this is big news. You've had your whole life to think about it. You made a decision to contact him.

You have just rocked his world and he will need sometime to let it sink in and figure out how to tell his family and figure out how to make it all work. He has already been more receptive than a lot of people would have been. Give him a little time.

True. I am the least patient person he will ever meet. Lol.
My Mom just told me to be patient too, but I want to know! I don't want to continue getting emotionally connected with someone who I THINK is my father, and have it not turn out to be, but I'm still emotionally connected you know? I'll just wait..

Paternity testing here we come!!

Well here's the newest crappy update... his wife got to his head, and I've sent him 3 messages (over myspace) since he has told me that he doesn't have the money or time for an $89.00 at home paternity test that I found online, and I told him that I could always go through family court, and they can arrange for us to both take a paternity test... he has read all 3 messages, but isn't responding back. I don't see anything left to do but contact family court, or forget about him (which I'm not about to do considering I've not had a father for 20 years.)


What do you think Judy?? :-(

Hi,
I'm going to family court tomorrow and petitioning for a paternity test, my grandmother retired from the office, and she said that "at home paternity tests" are a liability in court as far as life insurance, inheritance, whatever. And court appointed tests are more accurate... and I don't want him or anyone else to have anymore doubts. I can tell by the sound of his voice that he's worried about me petitioning for child support, which I'm not going to do. But he is also giving me a very hard time about buying a test... that's why I'm going to family court. First he says he cannot afford a test, now he's saying that my mom should pay for everything because she "kept me from him" which is UNTRUE, because everyone in my family witnessed her calling him when I was younger and he didn't give a sh*t less. WHAT DOES EVERYONE THINK ABOUT THIS??

Well here's the newest crappy update... his wife got to his head, and I've sent him 3 messages (over myspace) since he has told me that he doesn't have the money or time for an $89.00 at home paternity test that I found online, and I told him that I could always go through family court, and they can arrange for us to both take a paternity test... he has read all 3 messages, but isn't responding back. I don't see anything left to do but contact family court, or forget about him (which im not about to do considering I've not had a father for 20 years.)


What do you think Judy???????????? :-(



Somehow this thread got dropped from the list of threads that automatically notify me - I just got the message that there is new activity. I haven't been ignoring you; I didn't know any of this was going on. I've answered your other post but wanted to clear this up first.

I'm really sorry I didn't know any of this was going on -

So on to the next post!

Hi,
I'm going to family court tomorrow and petitioning for a paternity test, my grandmother retired from the office, and she said that "at home paternity tests" are a liability in court as far as life insurance, inheritance, whatever. And court appointed tests are more accurate...and I don't want him or anyone else to have anymore doubts. I can tell by the sound of his voice that hes worried about me petitioning for child support, which I'm not going to do. But he is also giving me a very hard time about buying a test... that's why im going to family court. First he says he cannot afford a test, now hes saying that my mom should pay for everything because she "kept me from him" which is UNTRUE, because everyone in my family witnessed her calling him when I was younger and he didn't give a sh*t less. WHAT DOES EVERYONE THINK ABOUT THIS???????????


Right, at home paternity tests don't even have to be recognized by the Court. Plus if he is trying to "avoid" being your father, anybody could take the test at his end and you would never know.

I think he's conflicted - this must be a bolt out of the blue (and maybe he's conveniently "forgetting" that he talked to your Mom back when you were born). I'm sure his wife is rather shocked if she had no knowledge of this at all. On one hand, you may very well be his daughter and he's curious; on the other, this is a shock.

I will be curious to see what Family Court says, if they can help. I really don't know how this works when the "child" is an adult.

How do you feel about it - should you go to Family Court tomorrow or give it a little more time, give him a chance to think it over.

The good news is he isn't denying you, isn't calling your mother names (and that happens). I think he may just need some time. This has got to be a shock to him - and, as you've said, you've waited this long, what's another week - ?

On the other hand - if you have decided to do this, if you've got yourself of a mindset that this is the time, then go for it. I don't see you have anything to lose. You've come this far, pressed forward, located him, kept "us" all informed. Maybe now is the time to resolve this once and for all.

(I'll go back to selecting our matching outfits for the Maury Show - :D )

I know of no family court that will do a test for a adult, the mother has to file for benefits of a minor child. So I don't see the courts doing anything for you.

Chuck, that's not what my local family court in NYS has told me. Like I said, My grandmother worked there for 15 years and recently retired. I don't see any reason why they wouldn't help me with a paternity test..?

And Judy, I did think you were ignoring me! Lol but I'm glad you weren't! I need you!

But here's more to the story as of 5 minutes ago!. He called me, and I told him I am petitioning for a paternity test tomorrow morning, he went on the defense and was scared about cops, supenas (sp), and court. Family Court told me that if he was unable to show up to court 4 hours away where I live, then he could "appear" by phone and take a test in his town, and I'll take my test in my town. He basically wouldn't have to show up or see me at all... His wife is definitely in his head because while we were talking I heard her call me a liar about him being my father, and she was telling him what to say/ask... but I could careless her thoughts on his right now anyway.

He started calling my mom a slut, a town whore, and denying ever meeting me when I was a baby, and denying ever knowing I existed... which is fine, I expected that! My whole family expected that. He keeps insisting that we just take an at home test, which is out of the question, screw that especially because of what Fr_Chuck just said about someone else taking it for him! The conversation we just had didn't get us anywhere. He said at first he imagined me as some vulnerable defensless little girl but since he's talked to me and found out that I've been arrested once, and that I have a boyfriend that's older than me, etc etc now he doesn't think I'm that little girl growing up without a father. I didn't really understand what he was trying to say... do you guys?? Then he was saying that I grew up well, my mother has money, I'm on a petistool, my life was peaches and cream, and I shouldn't be ruining his life and he wants to go back to his normal life...

It seems to me like he's trying to make me and my mother feel bad about finding him and saying "I think you're my father". Which in a way I understand because of the shock factor, but I know I don't owe him anything. I think he just always thought that this would never surface you know... haha jokes on him, its surfaced. The proof will be in the pudding when we take a test...

But can he refuse to take a family court appointed paternity test? My grandma says no, or they might issue a warrant for his arrest. This whole thing is stressssssin me out!! Until next time

And judy, I am sick of waiting all ready! I don't want to keep talking to this man if just pretend, he isn't the father. Why get emotionally attached? I'm doing the dang thing in the morning!!

I know of no family court that will do a test for a adult, the mother has to file for benifits of a minor child. So I don't see the courts doing anything for you.



NYS will order paternity testing under certain circumstances - for example, health problems (if you are concerned about inherited health problems), inheritance, things of that nature. They don't grant every request but they are fairly lenient.

The other side of this is people have had their lives disrupted because someone, somewhere thinks maybe a person is the father, he gets pulled in for DNA and discovers he is not. Meanwhile his life is in shambles -

I don't really know the best thing to do here - but that's probably for a relationship board.

He started calling my mom a slut, a town whore, and denying ever meeting me when I was a baby, and denying ever knowing I existed... which is fine, I expected that!! My whole family expected that. He keeps insisting that we just take an at home test, which is out of the question, screw that especially because of what Fr_Chuck just said about someone else taking it for him! The convo we just had didn't get us anywhere. He said at first he imagined me as some vulnerable defensless little girl but since hes talked to me and found out that ive been arrested once, and that i have a boyfriend thats older than me, etc etc now he doesn't think I'm that little girl growing up without a father. I didnt really understand what he was trying to say......do you guys??!?! Then he was saying that I grew up well, my mother has money, I'm on a petistool, my life was peaches and cream, and I shouldn't be ruining his life and he wants to go back to his normal life...

It seems to me like hes trying to make me and my mother feel bad about finding him and saying "I think you're my father". Which in a way I understand because of the shock factor, but I know I don't owe him anything. I think he just always thought that this would never surface ya know...haha jokes on him, its surfaced. The proof will be in the pudding when we take a test...

But can he refuse to take a family court appointed paternity test?? my grandma says no, or they might issue a warrant for his arrest. This whole thing is stressssssin me out!!! Until next time



Sad news, indeed - so much for my theory that he needs time to think things over and let all of this sink in!

Sounds like his defense is he's bad but you're worse - or something equally stupid.

I don't know what Family Court will do - I've seen them order testing in cases where inherited health problems are involved or inheritance but I don't know how many they deny for every one they approve.

I just hope you can walk away from all of this, one way or the other, relatively unscathed. This has to be just shattering.

Let us know -

I am interested to know what kind of health problems run in his family. I know his mother just died of cancer last year... but anyway, I know the judge will ask me what took me so long, and my answer will be that I couldn't find him.. no one could.

I am interested to know what kind of health problems run in his family. I know his mother just died of cancer last year...but anyways, I know the judge will ask me what took me so long, and my answer will be that I couldn't find him..no one could.



BINGO! You've got it!

So what do u have in mind as far as out outfits for maury go??

That is, if this whole court thing doesn't work...

so what do u have in mind as far as out outfits for maury go???

that is, if this whole court thing doesnt work...


Let's see, we're both blonde so something that looks good on blondes. I very seldom watch Maury but I DO see a lot of spandex on the show. Wonder how we'd look in spandex - :D

Maybe AMHD would provide the outfits if we'd give them free publicity - wonder who I should contact about that? Of course, we COULD end up with t-shirts with AMHD written across our chests which might not be terribly flattering.

I'll get back to you on this -

Does anyone know a free website that locates people? Just a name search or a free police record search? I'm looking for someone in PA...
So what happened - ? Don't leave me hanging!

Well I filled out the petition for a paternity test, and dropped it off. Since all the women who work in the office are good friends with my Grandma because she worked there, they pushed my petition ahead, and our court date is Sept. 10th! Less then 2 weeks away! On that day me and my mom will take tests, and then play the waiting game for the results... and for him to take his too. I haven't talked to him since he freaked out on me and was calling my mom a slut, but I'm wondering if I should tell him that I got my papers/summon in the mail today? What do you think? I don't think he deserves to know at this point, but I'm interested to see what else he's got to say...

And NO SPANDEX, yuck! ;)

Well I filled out the petition for a paternity test, and dropped it off. Since all the women who work in the office are good friends with my Grandma because she worked there, they pushed my petition ahead, and our court date is Sept. 10th! less then 2 weeks away! On that day me and my mom will take tests, and then play the waiting game for the results...and for him to take his too. I havent talked to him since he freaked out on me and was calling my mom a slut, but I'm wondering if I should tell him that I got my papers/summon in the mail today?? What do you think? I don't think he deserves to know at this point, but I'm interested to see what else hes got to say...

And NO SPANDEX, yuck!! ;)


OK, spandex is out.

I think I'd leave him alone for the minute - I'm sure you'll hear from him when he hears from the Court!

Yeah even though I've told him I'm going the family court route, I think its still going to be a bad day for him when he gets those papers!

Okay newest update... he got our original court date (sept 10th) adjourned to oct.8th. He is having some PA lawyer do some research for him to find out if it is 100% necessary for him to fill out the financial affidavit... which as my grandma says, it is! The lawyer is not representing my "father" because he does not have a license to practice in NYS. Everyone at family court says that this is the only time he can put off court because a secretary there marked our file as "do not allow any more adjournments". Lol!

Okay newest update...he got our original court date (sept 10th) adjourned to oct.8th. He is having some PA lawyer do some research for him to find out if it is 100% necessary for him to fill out the financial affidavit... which as my grandma says, it is! The lawyer is not representing my "father" because he does not have a license to practice in NYS. Everyone at family court says that this is the only time he can put off court because a secretary there marked our file as "do not allow any more adjournments". lol!


He thinks he can get around Family Court - ? Surprising because Family Court is tough.

Let's see, October 8th. Another month to ride things out.

I'm surprised he was allowed this adjournment but he has to have a chance - I guess.

OK, back to planning our outfits for Maury :)

You must be on pins and needles - well, this gives you more time to be prepared, build up some internal strength for whatever happens.

But still - I was hoping it would get resolved for you.

You're tellin' me... I wanted it to be done and over with... good thing this is the only time he will be allowed to put it off. Haha. I let him have this one. He doesn't want anyone to know how much he makes, so he's either more broke than he says and is embarrassed, or he's better off than he says, who knows... who cares... I think he's just worried about paying 20 years of back support which obviously won't happen, if I got support they would only go back to the day I petitioned and that would be a month ago...

I just hope he shows up in NY to take the test with us, because then we'd all find out sooner. If my mom and I take it alone, then NYS family court would have to get with PA court and arrange for him to take it at his local hospital or wherever... I hope he just doesn't refuse to take the test because then they'll issue a warrant for his arrest, and most likely suspend his driving license. He won't answer 2 emails that I sent him, like I'm the bad guy or something.. it just shows how "mature" he is. Oh and did you know that Maury isn't free? I called the show and it's something ridiculous like $400 bucks to get a paternity test... plus airfare, food, hotel whatever.

Until next time,
Katie

You're tellin' me... I wanted it to be done and over with... good thing this is the only time he will be allowed to put it off. haha. I let him have this one. He doesn't want anyone to know how much he makes, so hes either more broke than he says and is embarrassed, or he's better off than he says, who knows...who cares... I think he's just worried about paying 20 years of back support which obviously won't happen, if I got support they would only go back to the day I petitioned and that would be a month ago...

I just hope he shows up in NY to take the test with us, because then we'd all find out sooner. If my mom and I take it alone, then NYS family court would have to get with PA court and arrange for him to take it at his local hospital or wherever...I hope he just doesn't refuse to take the test because then they'll issue a warrant for his arrest, and most likely suspend his driving license. He won't answer 2 emails that I sent him, like I'm the bad guy or something.. it just shows how "mature" he is. Oh and did you know that Maury isn't free? I called the show and it's something ridiculous like $400 bucks to get a paternity test...plus airfare, food, hotel whatever.

Until next time,
Katie


Have to wonder what he's thinking - hopefully his Attorney will tell him not to play around with this stuff or he'll get in some serious trouble.

The sad thing is if he had been responsible the first time your mother ever told him about you you could have known each other all these years and he could have avoided all this now. Well, maybe it's a lesson for other people -

I'm amazed that you have to PAY for the Maury show - ridiculous.

Well, hopefully the Courts will take care of things.

I had to smile - I had no idea what your first name is. My name actually is Judy Katie. Small World, isn't it - ?

My real name is kathryn, but everyone calls me Katie.. and yes , it is weird!!

Is there a way to find people even if they are unlisted?

Yeah you can pay for a background check on the internet... some things like address and criminal record may come up... Ive been through them all... if you want I can help you, people on here have helped me, and I've learned a lot! And they told me all the sources to go to... message me a name and I can try my best

Only ANSWER the question on this page here. Do NOT ASK a question.

You are NOT logged in.

I'm so mad! Like I told everyone before, my grandma retired from family court here in NY where I'm from so she tells me what's going on for the most part... I called the court and asked them if my "dad" had turned in his financial affidavit because we knew he was kind of fighting that part of it... they courts said yes, he turned it in and he will be appearing by phone to our first court date (oct.8th). My grandma AND the court told me they will mail me a copy of his financial and I told them that I'm in the area so I'll pick it up... I go to pick it up and the lady at the desk said "we can't give you it until the results are in due to his privacy" I was like he has my ssn on the court papers which I think is waaay more private than how much someone makes a year. God I hate NYS

I'm so mad! Like I told everyone before, my grandma retired from family court here in NY where I'm from so she tells me what's going on for the most part... I called the court and asked them if my "dad" had turned in his financial affidavit because we knew he was kinda fighting that part of it... they courts said yes, he turned it in and he will be appearing by phone to our first court date (oct.8th). My grandma AND the court told me they will mail me a copy of his financial and I told them that I'm in the area so I'll pick it up...I go to pick it up and the lady at the desk said "we can't give you it until the results are in due to his privacy" I was like he has my ssn on the court papers which I think is waaay more private than how much someone makes a year. God I hate NYS



Family Courts vary from County to County - which admittedly is not fair - and once again it makes me very angry when people are told one thing and then actually get to the Court and the true story is something else. I've known people who have known Small Claims has adjourned a case when it has not and they suddenly are trying to set aside a Judgment. I get called to testify in cases, get to the Courthouse and discover the case has either been adjourned or settled. Frustrating.

I'm always cautioning people NOT to get "legal advice" from Court Clerks - they're not allowed to give it (although they do anyway) and it's not solid advice.

I'm so sorry it turned out this way - this seems to have been dragging on forever! Well, here we go - another week to wait!

2 days until test time.

2 days until test time.



Waiting, patiently waiting - how are you holding up? It's been a long road for you. And your Mom? Is she going to have to face "him" in Court? That's got to be rough.

Keep your cool!

My mom has her doubts now.. I told her I will never speak to her again if he's not my father because after all this?? I would be crushed. Its not like me and him are talking or I necessarily want him to be my dad because he's a butthole, but its just the fact that all these feelings are there now. I don't know if that made sense lol. My moms thinking back, "was he the only man"? I'm like OMG. He is appearing by phone... not in person.

My mom has her doubts now.. I told her I will never speak to her again if hes not my father because after all this??? I would be crushed. Its not like me and him are talking or I necessarily want him to be my dad because hes a butthole, but its just the fact that all these feelings are there now. idk if that made sense lol. My moms thinking back, "was he the only man"? im like OMG. He is appearing by phone...not in person.



You make me laugh! I FORGOT he's appearing by phone - well, I think that almost makes it easier than facing him - maybe - ?

I know what you mean about mixed emotions -

Fingers crossed.

Tomorrow should be no big deal... me and my mom will take a test and thatll be it... when we get the results back is when ill be having a heart attack at age 20. Hahaha

Tomorrow should be no big deal... me and my mom will take a test and thatll be it... when we get the results back is when ill be having a heart attack at age 20. Hahaha

Okay my mom and I got our mouths swabbed, Rob appeared by phone (which was odd as all heck) and the judge said we will get something in the mail with the results, and a new court date so he can re-tell us the results... I'm so excited, but then again not so excited because I don't think even if he IS my father that he will try to have any type of relationship with me... and if he doesn't call me or acknowledge me within a week of us getting the results, then I WILL get him for support. What a shiiiity person huh? Oh well, you live and you learn. I can't be mad, at least I found out who my father was! Until next court date...

Katie

Okay my mom and I got our mouths swabbed, Rob appeared by phone (which was odd as all heck) and the judge said we will get something in the mail with the results, and a new court date so he can re-tell us the results... I'm so excited, but then again not so excited because I don't think even if he IS my father that he will try to have any type of relationship with me... and if he doesn't call me or acknowledge me within a week of us getting the results, then I WILL get him for support. What a shiiiity person huh? Oh well, you live and you learn. I can't be mad, at least I found out who my father was! Until next court date...

Katie



I thought of you yesterday - sat in an Attorney's office to talk about locating someone. Woman has serious health problems, her mother died very young, she was raised by her stepfather, Doctor would like family history - and she does not know her father other than a very common last name. No date of his birth. Apparently mother shredded her copies of everything a long time ago. It's going to be so difficult to find him! Attorney is trying to get Court Order to open records but so far that's been an uphill, expensive battle.

So even if your "father" wants no contact now at least if there ever is a problem you know where to look and who to ask.

And someday - who knows - ?

True. I love you. :-)

true. i love you. :-)



Back at you - and you'll always know, how matter how this turns out, that you did you very, very best to get to know your "father," despite the odds.

Lots of guts, my friend, lots of guts.


Would you do me a favor and take a look at this: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/missing-persons/where-scottish-dad-264459.html. You better than anyone what a painful search this can be, how upsetting the result can be, what it takes, and I am honestly worried because she is "only" 15 and apparently her mother is not aware.

Maybe we won't agree on this one but I will certainly value your opinion based on your experience.

Okay ill take a look now...

Okay so I'm still waiting for test results... does anyone know why the heck its taking soooo long?? I took my test on oct 8th

okay so im still waiting for test results....does anyone know why the heck its taking soooo long??? i took my test on oct 8th



I saw this and my heart jumped and then I read it and my heart fell.

I have NO idea why the long wait unless the Court/lab are really backed up.

And so the waiting game continues...

I know Judy. I'm about to FLIP THE FREAK OUT. I will call them everyday starting tomorrow morning and ask them what's going on. I understand that out of state cases/ testing obv. Takes longer, I get that. But they told me Definitely 4-6 weeks... we are on our 7th week right now. =( and don't worry, once I do get the results I will PM you approximately 1,434,346568,34347673634636,346363636 times!!

I wonder why though... perhaps until I turn 21 then he wouldn't have to pay support??

I know Judy. I'm about to FLIP THE FREAK OUT. I will call them everyday starting tomorrow morning and ask them what's going on. I understand that out of state cases/ testing obv. takes longer, I get that. But they told me DEFINATELY 4-6 weeks...we are on our 7th week right now. =( and dont worry, once I do get the results I will PM you approximately 1,434,346568,34347673634636,346363636 times!!!!!!!!

Hi, zawatska!

Why not post the results on this thread? You've already continued this thread for quite some length and the site is about asking questions and getting answers that are visible to all so that others might also benefit by the answers that have been given as well as the discussion that may have happened.

I'm sure that others would also like to know the results. I know that I'm one who's interested in what the results will be.

Thanks!

Hi, zawatska!

Why not post the results on this thread? You've already continued this thread for quite some length and the site is about asking questions and getting answers that are visible to all so that others might also benefit by the answers that have been given as well as the discussion that may have happened.

I'm sure that others would also like to know the results. I know that I'm one who's interested in what the results will be.

Thanks!



I'm sure she will do both - post (as she has always done) and also PM me. This is not an attempt to take it off the board.

Any private conversation has concerned identifying information which is inappropriate to post.

i wonder why though...perhaps until i turn 21 then he wouldnt have to pay support???



Good point - has this issue been raised at all? Was the petition for ongoing support, back support?

That's a good question - I'll be very interested in the answer.

Clough I don't have the test results yet, which is the reason I haven't posted the results!! READ.

And me expressing my feelings about waiting so long for the results is helping others who may read this thread... other people may be waiting for their results also, and have the same anxious feelings that I do. And this thread can go on as long as Fr_chuck or judy or whoever says it can.

And I can PM Judy all day... we've become close, and if I want to PM her asking her how her day was, that's appropriate and I will continue doing it!

I'm sorry this is dragging on so long. You must feel tortured! You've been really brave through all this so just hang on a little longer. You've made it this far, you're almost there. :)

I'm sorry this is dragging on so long. You must feel tortured!! You've been really brave through all this so just hang on a little longer. You've made it this far, you're almost there. :)



The amazing part of this - to me - is that "Z" came here for info and insight, read and digested and actually located her possible father... and followed through. I wasn't sure she even HAD a case here and she was absolutely tenacious, took the power into her hands and ran with it. Stood up for what she thought was right. And her mother stood right next to her the whole time.

Takes a lot of guts.

OMG!! Test results just came in, I left work to check my mail because I had a strange gut feeling... they were there!!

He is 99.99% my father!! Ahhhhhhh Judy!!

I sent my DAD an email... we will see if he even responds! (doubt it) I finally have closure, and that is all I ask or really wanted... Now should I get child support or no?

OMG!!!!!! Test results just came in, I left work to check my mail because I had a strange gut feeling.... they were there!!!

He is 99.99% my father!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ahhhhhhh Judy!!!

I sent my DAD an email ....we will see if he even responds!! (doubt it) I finally have closure, and that is all I ask or really wanted....Now should I get child support or no?



Oh, my - and now he can eat his words.

Now you can go to Court and file for child support - talk to the Court Clerk, see if it's worth it, what the policy is because I'm not 100% sure. You're so close to 21 -

Well, all else aside - you found out what you wanted to know! You've won the first round and now it's up to you how to proceed.

Let me digest this but I'm happy for you - it's been a long road and you've persisted.

Way to go "Z"!

(Your experience will also be very helpful to other people facing the same situation and posting here.)

Well from what my grandma has told me... she retired from fam court... she said they will go back to July when I petitioned for the paternity test, up until April when I turn 21... OR she has seen some judges go back a whole 20 years... weird.

And I hope others get some help out of my posts. :)

Well from what my grandma has told me...she retired from fam court...she said they will go back to july when i petitioned for the paternity test, up until april when i turn 21... OR she has seen some judges go back a whole 20 years.....weird.

and i hope others get some help out of my posts. :)



People have posted both scenarios - back for 20 years, back to the date of filing. I'm curious to find out because other people have asked.

Shouldn't you be out somewhere, celebrating?

Hi Z - congratulations! I am in complete awe of your strenghth. If he doesn't want to be part of your life, then he is a fool. Anyone with sense would be proud to have you as a daughter. Definitely go after whatever child support you can get. Your mom has gone it alone for long enough.

Judy I don't drink because I'm not 21 yet.. or do drugs so celebrating is out of the question... when I turn 21 I will celebrate for this, and every other holiday that has passed haha. Me, my mom and my dad are going to go to every bar in town and have one drink... there is at least 100 bars in my town... we will see how far we make it. Lmao ;)

Judy I don't drink because im not 21 yet..., or do drugs so celebrating is out of the question... when I turn 21 I will celebrate for this, and every other holiday that has passed haha. me, my mom and my dad are going to go to every bar in town and have one drink....there is at least 100 bars in my town...we will see how far we make it. lmao ;)



With this news I think I'd celebrate right now with Diet Pepsi (my particular "addiction") and a bag of chips!

Haha that'll do. :) thanks for evvverything everyone...

Especially you Judy 1. xoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoooo

haha that'll do. :) thanks for evvverything everyone...

especially you Judy 1. xoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoooo



Back at you - <group hug> - I just may show up for your birthday celebration! :D

It's everyone working together here, not just one person, but I appreciate the thanks.

April 21st. Lets make plans. Where are u again? Nyc?

april 21st. lets make plans. where are u again? nyc?



Answered by PM -

OMG!!!!!! Test results just came in, I left work to check my mail because I had a strange gut feeling.... they were there!!!

He is 99.99% my father!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ahhhhhhh Judy!!!

I sent my DAD an email ....we will see if he even responds!! (doubt it) I finally have closure, and that is all I ask or really wanted....Now should I get child support or no?

That's awesome! Thanks for letting us know! :)

Well it's iffy... im happy I have closure finally, and I know the truth, but then again I'm pee-d off because he won't talk to me... like I did something wrong! I guess he still acts how he used to... you can't teach old dogs new tricks I guess... :-/

Well it's iffy...im happy i have closure finally, and i know the truth, but then again im pee-d off because he won't talk to me... like I did something wrong!! I guess he still acts how he used to....you can't teach old dogs new tricks I guess...:-/



Sometimes when people can't face up to what happened or what they've done they use anger as a shield - "It's not me, it's you."

Also, anger is an easier emotion than sadness or grief and your father would have to feel some guilt and loss because he wasn't there for you and I would guess he can't handle those emotions.

And then add that maybe he never mentioned you to his wife (although he knew there was a very good possibility he was your father) and suddenly - surprise!

I think he is incapable, for whatever reason, of holding himself responsible so it's all your fault. (I guess he's one of those people who has to blame somebody, even if the blame is not rational.)

I hope you keep coming back and posting - when people who are 14 or 15 post, looking for a parent, positive there will be a happy ending, your experience will be helpful to them, not to discourage them but to say, "Hey, it might not all be wonderful when you find your parent."

Very true... Rob has 3 other kids too... He is really involved with his sons schooling, and geez he's even his sons football coach... so now I have a step daughter who is 3, and a half brother who's like 12... he has another one, but its not his, it's his wife's from another relationship. I just wish we could talk! And I have no doubt that he didn't tell his wife about any of this... she knows now! She's the type of beeeeeeotch who says "I dont believe it" lets take another test... there is only .05 % that he's NOT my father... he can't fight that one in court... court is on Monday... lets see how that goes... the judge is going to ask me if I am seeking support... my answer is going to be heck yes... im pretty bitter. :) have a happy thanksgiving everyone!!

Ps-judy, I got your pm, thanks for sharing that with me... u better come from syracuse to party for my birthday!! ;-)

Very true... Rob has 3 other kids too...He is really involved with his sons schooling, and geez hes even his sons football coach... so now I have a step daughter who is 3, and a half brother who's like 12....he has another one, but its not his, it's his wifes from another relationship. I just wish we could talk! And I have no doubt that he didn't tell his wife about any of this...she knows now! Shes the type of beeeeeeotch who says "I dont believe it" lets take another test... there is only .05 % that hes NOT my father...he can't fight that one in court....court is on monday...lets see how that goes...the judge is going to ask me if i am seeking support....my answer is going to be heck yes....im pretty bitter. :) have a happy thanksgiving everyone!!!

ps-judy, i got ur pm, thanks for sharing that with me... u better come from syracuse to party for my birthday!!! ;-)




This is me smiling - you're too much. It's a long drive but I bet I can make it! Your father has NO idea what he's missing!

Ok, so here's an update... I feel like a complete nut case today. I need to be committed I swear I do! ;-)

I'm stuck. I don't know whether child support is the right route to go... he still hasn't answered the 2 emails I sent him... one with the court papers saying he IS indeed my father (because he didn't receive his copies yet and I was anxious to hear what he had on his mind about it), and the other email asking him why he hasn't emailed me back, and how he feels... he is obv. Ignoring me... real mature right? Its getting to the point where I feel like I'm nagging him... :-/

I am definitely in court on Monday going to tell the judge I want his financial affidavit, and his medical history... medical is important... financial not so much but I want his because he has mine and my moms, but family court gave me a hard time at first to get his because he "is only your assumed father"...

I'm just stuck because I feel like whatever way I go re child support, we will have no relationship... so I just might as well get it to spite him? You know because my mom did raise me for over 20 years... Help me guys! J_9, Judy, Fr_Chuck

Okay, I had court today... the outcome is $25/week temporary support... rob is taking me to trial on jan 28th 2009 to establish whether I was emancipated... which I wasn't. I moved out of my mothers house after an argument, and moved in with my grandmother who retired from family court... if she has to, she will show up in court and vouch that that's true... My mom or I NEVER signed anything that said I'm emancipated, or she's not responsible for me anymore or anything! He will lose this one, and I will get greedy and ask for more money. And I finally got his financial affidavit... his house has a worth of $$190,000

And get this.. I told the judge I am only asking for the minimum order of support whatever that was, and the judge said $25/MONTH and Rob said "yeah I can do that, thats more than fair!" haha you've got to be kidding..
Oh well, 25/week is better than nothing, although he got out of 20 years of bills... I also get medical insurance if its available through his work, which I'm sure it is...

Okay, I had court today...the outcome is $25/week temporary support...rob is taking me to trial on jan 28th 2009 to establish whether or not I was emancipated...which I wasn't. I moved out of my mothers house after an argument, and moved in with my grandmother who retired from family court...if she has to, she will show up in court and vouch that that's true...My mom or I NEVER signed anything that said I'm emancipated, or shes not responsible for me anymore or anything! He will lose this one, and I will get greedy and ask for more money. And I finally got his financial affidavit...his house has a worth of $$190,000

and get this.. I told the judge I am only asking for the minimum order of support whatever that was, and the judge said $25/MONTH and Rob said "yeah I can do that, thats more than fair!" haha you've got to be kidding..
oh well, 25/week is better than nothing, although he got out of 20 years of bills...I also get medical insurance if its available through his work, which im sure it is...



Well, and like any other Court proceeding you tell your side, he tells his and the Judge decides what's fair/equitable and so forth.

I have NO idea how he is going to prove long distance that you are/were emancipated - and he has to prove it, not just come up with theories.

I'm torn about what you should ask for - I don't think child support is a means of exacting revenge BUT he always knew you were out there, somewhere, and did nothing, started another life and so forth. The other side of it is your mother never pursued him - for reasons I understand.

I'm honestly torn here - I would like to see him acknowledge you, get to know you, all of that stuff but I don't think that's going to happen, at least not now. He behaved badly for a number of years and I'm sure he knows it. Maybe that's why he's throwing up road blocks.

Honestly - I'm torn.

I honestly don't care though. From what I've seen, we're nothing alike... and I don't think I will ever get over the fact that he has started a family, and is involved in his kids' lives, and he just wrote me off like nothing.

I'm over it. Hey, at least I know who he is and what he looks like. That's all I wanted, and I'm happy with that.

How can I find my sister from my fathers side with just his info and next to nothing about my sister

Well it took me a few yrs to find my father... u don't know anything about your father? If you do know his name, and age then there is luck... just use Google and search "free people search" and websites will come up and they will show past addresses, possible relatives, and sometimes phone numbers good luck! And if you still need help you can pm me with your fathers name and I can take a swing at it..

I'm sorry I read your question wrong... u DO know things about your father so yes, I'm sure a free search will provide you with possible relatives of your father... I would also try to ask around and see what your sisters name is... that would make it much easier for you.

Well, and like any other Court proceeding you tell your side, he tells his and the Judge decides what's fair/equitable and so forth.

I have NO idea how he is going to prove long distance that you are/were emancipated - and he has to prove it, not just come up with theories.

I'm torn about what you should ask for - I don't think child support is a means of exacting revenge BUT he always knew you were out there, somewhere, and did nothing, started another life and so forth. The other side of it is your mother never pursued him - for reasons I understand.

I'm honestly torn here - I would like to see him acknowledge you, get to know you, all of that stuff but I don't think that's going to happen, at least not now. He behaved badly for a number of years and I'm sure he knows it. Maybe that's why he's throwing up road blocks.

Honestly - I'm torn.



I know "we're" just watching the days drag by but thought I'd give this a kick start - and see where you've been hiding in the process!

Honestly... I just don't care anymore.. I'm kind of over it... I get the fact that he wants nothing to do with me, and I've got that same mutual feeling... I don't need another "dad" because I've got one... biological or not... doesn't matter. And as far as having Rob as a friend, no thanks... I've got enough friends... no need to make new ones. I'll just sit back and collect my child support, and eventually get my medical insurance (thats what I really care about)

Sad but true... =) I'm groovy baby!

So our trial date is coming up, where he THINKS he's going to prove that I am self supporting, and he shouldn't have to pay me my meesly little $25/week...

I'm kind of nervous, and freaked out actually... everyone keeps telling me that I will win, but I'm starting to second guess that... :-/

So our trial date is coming up, where he THINKS he's going to prove that I am self supporting, and he shouldn't have to pay me my meesly little $25/week...

I'm kind of nervous, and freaked out actually...everyone keeps telling me that I will win, but I'm starting to second guess that...:-/



Don't second guess yourself. Even if you "lose," you've actually won!

How so Judy? And I know he can't supeona anyone, because no one HE knows, knows me! And I wonder if it would prove I'm NOT self supporting if all my utilities are in my moms name? I rent off her, but nothing is in my name...

How so Judy? And I know he can't supeona anyone, because no one HE knows, knows me! And I wonder if it would prove I'm NOT self supporting if all my utilities are in my moms name? I rent off of her, but nothing is in my name...


Because you found him, you know EXACTLY where he stands, you found out EXACTLY what he's made of. If you ever for any reason need his medical history, now you know where to go to get it.

You know how much respect I have for you for this journey you have taken and the way you've handled it. He's the one who has lost out.

I agree, he sucks. I'm surprised how well I've handled the rejection though lol.

I guess you can't miss or hate someone you don't know. I'm content. :)

I agree, he sucks. I'm surprised how well I've handled the rejection though lol.

I guess you can't miss or hate someone you don't know. I'm content. :)



But he didn't reject you as a person. He really doesn't even know you. He rejected the idea of being a father, specifically your father, I suppose.

Of course, I'm not in your shoes so it's easy for me to rattle on.

Group hug, group hug.

Well you're right...

But I DO feel like he rejected me as a person because he did say "u are set in ur ways and i have no influence of your choices, and your living with an older man (frank) and ur not married." ugh!

UPDATE!

I had a trial date on January 28th, and it was for "my dad" Rob to prove that I am self supporting and he shouldn't have to pay child support to me... he couldn't prove anything, and I am getting $25/week... and he has to pay me arrears (sp) dating back to August 28th... and I may get a raise in support, I'm waiting to hear back from the courts...

We still have zero contact.

UPDATE!!

I had a trial date on January 28th, and it was for "my dad" Rob to prove that I am self supporting and he shouldn't have to pay child support to me... he couldn't prove anything, and I am getting $25/week...and he has to pay me arrears (sp) dating back to August 28th...and I may get a raise in support, I'm waiting to hear back from the courts...

We still have zero contact.



I am sad and I am happy - and I am proud. I'm sad because I so hoped for some sort of reunion or connection; I am happy because you won this round; I am proud because those of us on the board gave you the best we had and walked through this from the very first post and you stuck to it. You know it's his loss - !

<hugs>

Sorry things haven't worked out the way you hoped... but at least there is now some legal responsibility being taken. You should be proud of yourself for seeing through this difficult situation.

Thanks guys! And no need to feel sorry for me... I'm good! I'm happy and healthy! I don't need him, I never knew him... maybe once I'm older and have children of my own, I may think differently about him being absent from my life, but right now, me being almost 21 yrs old, I'm okay with it :)... he isn't the man I hoped to have as a father anyway. Hes rude, disrespectful, and doesn't listen... not the man I wished for.