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View Full Version : I think my ex is happier now than she was with me.or is it a put on?


DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 03:28 PM
Okay I'm starting to get over her and I'm letting go. I'm using the no contact rule to help both of us out. I still have her as a friend on myspace and ever since we broke things off she seems happier now than she was with me. Only God and Her know what she really feels like but I'm just wandering if she feels like I feel and just covering it up to see what I would do. I know I'm thinking about it too much but it just gets me worked up about how she could not have feelings for me like I did for her. That's what I don't get. Please help.

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 03:34 PM
Ohhh I understand how you feel.
Well if only god and her know, how would we know?

I know you feel like, what is he feeling? Is she crazy about me and trying to act like she's fine but torn inside? Does she really not care? How could she not care!

It's a really bad feeling... I'm sorry but it's impossible for us to know.
Only she knows, try to see... by asking her friends... or I don't know look for clues.
But remember, if you ask other people... they might tell her. So... yeah. I don't know :/
Sorry,

DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 03:36 PM
Thanks it helps!

ylaira
Jul 24, 2008, 03:44 PM
Whatever she's feeling towards you, it doesnt matter now. So might as we'll show her you're much in a better place that you parted ways than show her you are miserable.

ilovcali
Jul 24, 2008, 03:51 PM
Well, you're obviously not over her yet. But that's OK. Whatever you are thinking DOES NOT have to be what she is thinking. Who cares what she thinks?

Remove her from you myspace. She's not YOUR FRIEND. Plus, I bet you look on her page, hoping, searching, looking for clues as to how she feels, if she's meeting new guys, etc. IT WILL DRIVE YOU NUTS!

Delete her from your life, completely. What you're feeling is totally natural. Just don't act on any false hopes or desires.

Good luck.

--Cali

N0help4u
Jul 24, 2008, 03:52 PM
Like yliara said what benefit is it to you to have satisfaction over what she feels like now?
She might get the satisfaction knowing you are obsessing on what she feels but what good is any of that doing you?
Often when people break up it is for the better because they feel negative energy that the relationship isn't working for them but that doesn't mean they don't care for you. Even still what good is that doing you? Move on and be content within yourself.

ylaira
Jul 24, 2008, 03:59 PM
Exactly Nohelp4u! Good job!

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 04:03 PM
My friend,

Let's knock this one out with some steps in my "Just not giving a damn anymore" handbook.

Numero Uno: Delete her from myspace, you know damn right she's checking your page lol.
Numero Dos: Make sure your page is set to "private", keep the girl guessin'

Numero Tres: Get a super cute girl to take a picture with you kissing your cheek or something. (this can be friend, random hottie, etc.)

Numero Quattro: Forget the Ex exists, if she tries to hit you up, just say what's up, be hella nice (like... OVERLY nice... "Hey, How have you been!? It's been so long since we've talked! What's new in your life?")

Numero Cinco: If the situation above happens.. there's a fork in the road where things can be brought up. Left side is that she has this new boyfriend and all that jazz... (this is when you say how awesome that is and that you'd love to meet him... that'll piss her off lol) Right side is that she misses you and wants to get back, and is questioning you about your myspace pic (she may be rude during this too.. "Oh, so you have a new girlfriend already? are you f*censored*ing her now?" typical ex-girlfriend saying."

You can be upset and still be humble during a breakup. By showing that you're perfectly fine with or without her, not only are you going to be happier in your life, if you did want her back... she'd see what she's missing. =)

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 04:29 PM
You can paypal me $10.99 at [email protected] for a copy ;) lol

N0help4u
Jul 24, 2008, 04:33 PM
I'll wait for the book :D

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 04:34 PM
There's a song I'm listening to, and in it he says..

To the left, to the left.
If you want to leave, be my guest. You can step.
Feeling irreplaceable, listening to Beyonce...
Well that's okay, I'll put you out on your B-day

Hahaha I love Lil' Wayne.

Follow the advice!

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 04:37 PM
I need some help deciding on a cover picture for my book?

You like?

http://smiliesftw.com/x/69gl6a.gif

N0help4u
Jul 24, 2008, 04:43 PM
Maybe title it clowns to the left of me jokers to the right
May need permission from Steve Miller.

Maybe change the yellow smiley to a red broken heart shape.

DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 04:46 PM
Ha ha I like it! Lol

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 04:49 PM
Maybe title it clowns to the left of me jokers to the right
may need permission from Steve Miller.

Maybe change the yellow smiley to a red broken heart shape.

Gosh, you're making me want to go see the Dark Knight again!

"Do you know how I got these scars?" =)

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 05:21 PM
Ha I saw all these people already. (:
Everyone is right, I'm sorry but there is no real solution. You can't choose who you like, or control your feelings.

You really have to try to move on, there's probably no other way. Try to keep your mind off her... I'm having troubles with guys too. -_-
Hang in there. (:

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 05:22 PM
hahaha I just read these comments. I don't see what they have to do with your question but.. haha =]

ylaira
Jul 24, 2008, 05:27 PM
marriaget, didn't u leave dora on your couch? Ha ha ha

DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 05:32 PM
I'm guessing ylaira and marriaget know each other! Lol

ylaira
Jul 24, 2008, 05:34 PM
She's the 13 yr old girl who's having 2nd thoughts of getting hook with a 17 yr old lad.

DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 05:40 PM
Oh I see. Well good luck marriaget! I wish you the best

ylaira
Jul 24, 2008, 05:44 PM
Read some other posts here, ull have fun. That's what I did when I was heartbroken last May. I have 350 posts now.

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 05:57 PM
Yeahh (: thanks<3 you too! Seriously, =]

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 05:59 PM
Actually... im 12... about to be 13 hahaha, super young. I knowww.
I'm guessing he's like 16... almost 17. >.< *sigh*
I'm mature for my age, or maybe everybody else my age is just immature and I'm normal. O.o ughh, life is so complex. And I love it?
Anyway yeah, good luck, don't worry much.
As for me... I don't know. -_-

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 06:14 PM
actually...im 12...about to be 13 hahaha, super young. I knowww.
I'm guessing he's like 16...almost 17. >.< *sigh*
I'm mature for my age, or maybe everybody else my age is just immature and i'm normal. O.o ughh, life is so complex. and i love it?
anyways yeah, good luck, dnt worry much.
As for me.....i don't know. -_-

You're 12? You shouldn't even be thinking about boys yet! Lol jk =)

12 years old with a 17 years old is a no bueno right now.

Follow the hand book DSJ05, I guarantee it'll work!

pwtnu4
Jul 24, 2008, 06:18 PM
Gosh, you're making me want to go see the Dark Knight again!

"Do you know how I got these scars?" =)

Haha, I've seen it twice... amazing movie!

And back to the original poster... ive been broken up with my ex for about a month and the same stuff has been going through my mind this whole time but there really is no way of knowing, the way she is not talking makes it seems like she's doing quite fine which at first was kind of upsetting because she wasn't feeling bad like me but I decided not to give her the satisfaction of knowing I was miserable and that's worked very well and I'm doing better, well relative to how I was... although at times I wonder whether she thinks of me but that really doesn't matter at this point... if she ever wants to talk, she'll come to you, nothing you can do, that still hasn't happened for me yet but I'm doing pretty good without her now

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 06:31 PM
Kevinnnnn, I said I'm almost 13!!
Plusssss, he's probably... like 16.. almost 17. Same thing! Lol ^-^ I hope he's like 15...
All I know is he's going to be a Junior in HS... so I kind of figured... 16/17?
well... yeah ^-^ lmao... heyy I'm just like a 16 yr old in a... 14 yr olds body... and I'm 12 ^-^ whatevaaaaaaa. =]

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 06:31 PM
haha, i've seen it twice...amazing movie!

and back to the original poster...ive been broken up with my ex for about a month and the same stuff has been goin through my mind this whole time but there really is no way of knowing, the way she is not talking makes it seems like she's doing quite fine which at first was kinda upsetting b/c she wasn't feeling bad like me but i decided not to give her the satisfaction of knowing i was miserable and that's worked very well and i'm doing better, well relative to how i was...although at times i wonder whether she thinks of me but that really doesnt matter at this point...if she ever wants to talk, she'll come to you, nothing u can do, that still hasn't happened for me yet but im doin pretty good without her now

Let's look at this from an objective standpoint. You (pwtnu4) are in your relationship, (same goes for you DSJ05), Everything is just gravy and then for some reason you break up. There is, and will always be that sort of attraction you had for one another. Just because the other person broke up with you, does not mean that they have a clean slate on their side.

They are probably thinking about you just as much as you are them. My girlfriend and I broke up for like 3 months during a confusing stage in our lives. She tried to talk to me every now and then, and I simply stayed busy, I was still in her families life because my gf's little sister thinks of me as her older brother and is always calling me to hang out, and she confides in me with her boy troubles and whatnot (she's 16 now).

3 months pass, and my girlfriend is sitting at my doorstep, in the pouring rain after I get home from work (11:30 p.m.) and asks if she can talk to me. I have no hard feelings towards her, I still care about her, and I have been very supportive of her in anything she needed, even if it meant a break/breakup/time apart/whatever you want to call it.

I get her a change of clothes, throw her clothes in the dryer and make her a cup of tea to warm up. I'm laying on my bed, she's in my desk chair next to the bed and talking to me.

Come to find out, she had NEVER stopped thinking about me, she had been wanting to talk to me so badly every single day but did not want to come crawling back and then eventually do the same thing again to me, so she wanted to wait to make sure that her actions, and decisions were perfectly clear.

She gets all emotional like women do (no offense ladies ;) ) and is apologizing profusely and all that crap. I tell her that it's not her actions that show who she really is, but that it's how she intends to fix them that shows her true colors. More talking goes on and she asks if we can try things again.

I tell her that I want to be supportive of her and that I don't want to get back in the relationship unless she is 100% sure she wants this. She does and we end up falling asleep together on my bed. The End.

Moral of the story? Even though she may have crushed you, kicked you in the nuts boys, and made you feel like... she did not necessarily do it intentionally. Breaking up with someone you care about is not easy, and we all live with the thoughts and regrets of our actions. If she cares about you dearly, she'll come back. Just make sure you are stern on the fact that you will not play these games anymore.

(Yeah, that's getting added to my super-box-office-smash-hit-guide!) lol

Kevin_s
Jul 24, 2008, 06:32 PM
If anyone needs help basically 24/7 and wants it almost immediately, hit me up on AIM. PM me for my SN.

pwtnu4
Jul 24, 2008, 07:34 PM
Let's look at this from an objective standpoint. You (pwtnu4) are in your relationship, (same goes for you DSJ05), Everything is just gravy and then for some reason you break up. There is, and will always be that sort of attraction you had for one another. Just because the other person broke up with you, does not mean that they have a clean slate on their side.

They are probably thinking about you just as much as you are them. My girlfriend and I broke up for like 3 months during a confusing stage in our lives. She tried to talk to me every now and then, and I simply stayed busy, I was still in her families life because my gf's little sister thinks of me as her older brother and is always calling me to hang out, and she confides in me with her boy troubles and whatnot (she's 16 now).

3 months pass, and my gf is sitting at my doorstep, in the pouring rain after I get home from work (11:30 p.m.) and asks if she can talk to me. I have no hard feelings towards her, I still care about her, and I have been very supportive of her in anything she needed, even if it meant a break/breakup/time apart/whatever you want to call it.

I get her a change of clothes, throw her clothes in the dryer and make her a cup of tea to warm up. I'm laying on my bed, she's in my desk chair next to the bed and talking to me.

Come to find out, she had NEVER stopped thinking about me, she had been wanting to talk to me so badly every single day but did not want to come crawling back and then eventually do the same thing again to me, so she wanted to wait to make sure that her actions, and decisions were perfectly clear.

She gets all emotional like women do (no offense ladies ;) ) and is apologizing profusely and all that crap. I tell her that it's not her actions that show who she really is, but that it's how she intends to fix them that shows her true colors. More talking goes on and she asks if we can try things again.

I tell her that I want to be supportive of her and that I don't want to get back in the relationship unless she is 100% sure she wants this. She does and we end up falling asleep together on my bed. The End.

Moral of the story? Even though she may have crushed you, kicked you in the nuts boys, and made you feel like ...she did not necessarily do it intentionally. Breaking up with someone you care about is not easy, and we all live with the thoughts and regrets of our actions. If she cares about you dearly, she'll come back. Just make sure you are stern on the fact that you will not play these games anymore.

(Yeah, that's getting added to my super-box-office-smash-hit-guide!) lol

Thanks kevin, that actually puts a lot of things in perspective

DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 08:09 PM
Yeah kevin that's for that point of view. That's what I wanted to know if she still thinks about me and stuff. I know you don't know and she is the only one but going through a serious relationship and to just end it like that... thats what gets me. I wish her well and I hope she comes back but in the mean time I'm not going to worry about her and just worry about myself.

lisi1129
Jul 24, 2008, 08:17 PM
Okay I'm starting to get over her and I'm letting go. I'm using the no contact rule to help both of us out. I still have her as a friend on myspace and ever since we broke things off she seems happier now than she was with me. Only God and Her know what she really feels like but I'm just wandering if she feels like I feel and just covering it up to see what I would do. I know I'm thinking about it to much but it just gets me worked up about how she could not have feelings for me like I did for her. that's what I don't get. Please help.
I know how you are feeling. Right now I am in the same position, I truly feel that he is happier without me and it hurts me to no end. My advice is to try and ignore her, erase her from your myspace, erase her number, try to put away anything that reminds you of her because that is even worst. Try and do what I am doing, I do so much stuff during the day than when I fall in bed I am so tired I straight to sleep that way I don't think. I am very sorry you are going through this Trust me I know how bad it is. Take care.

DSJ05
Jul 24, 2008, 08:24 PM
Well I'm glad I'm not alone going through all this. Thanks lisi1129. I've already deleted her phone numbers and stuff but I figure that I'll delete her from my myspace either tonight or tomorrow. Thanks for the advice!! I hope you get through it better than I'm doing.

LostInHisEyez
Jul 24, 2008, 08:57 PM
[QUOTE=marriaget]ohhh I understand how you feel.
Well if only god and her know, how would we know?[QUOTE]

lol, very sad, but true! Everyone would love to know what that other person is, especially with the "miracle" of myspace. =/
(even though I'm on myspace all day i hate it with a passion when you see the one you love with a happier status than you)
trust me, i used to go on myspace to just see those status' and eh.. not so good. I suggest deleting them, and just try to not think about it, even though it sounds impossible, for the most part you'd be surprised the day you stop thinking about them.
doesn't have to be today, or tomorrow, but soon, especially with myspace out of the way, things will be okay. =) hope i helped.

marriaget
Jul 24, 2008, 09:38 PM
kevin... marry me? Jp ^-^

Kevin_s
Jul 25, 2008, 03:19 AM
kevin.....marry me? jp ^-^


Hahaha, well that's a first. May I ask why? Lol Besides, I'm almost old enough to drink lol.

Romefalls19
Jul 25, 2008, 06:20 AM
That's why I always tell people to delete their ex off myspace, it will only screw your head up. Of course she is happy without you, she wasn't happy while she was with you so she broke up with you and now she's happy... Did you not see that happening?

DELETE HER!

DSJ05
Jul 25, 2008, 06:42 AM
Then why act happy for 3 months then the last week she just dumps you?

talaniman
Jul 25, 2008, 09:36 AM
Because it takes time to figure out what to do, so when she made up her mind, you find out she wasn't happy, or not happy enough. Her thing, not yours. Focus on you, and in time you will see things in a totally different light.