frangipanis
Jul 12, 2008, 11:17 AM
My boyfriend and I found out only last week that his ex-wife has taken a new job interstate and is leaving with their two boys and her partner in two week's time. I've only known his boys (aged 11 and 13) just over a year and I've been surprised by how much we enjoy each other's company. It's no effort at all to love these kids and I know I get the same in return. I'm really going to miss them a lot. His two older girls aged 18 and 21 will be staying here, and possibly his youngest daughter who is in her first year at university will move in with her dad.
It's the first time my partner will have ever been separated from any of his children through distance like this. As he took care of the four kids for two years not long after his divorce when his ex-wife fulfilled her wish to live overseas with her partner, I know how devoted he has been to his children.
He seemed to take the news calmly and said he couldn't be selfish about it, and besides, what else could he do? He doesn't want to make it unnecessarily difficult for anyone. His only surprise is that no-one is ever too sure how stable his youngest daughter is who has had two serious bouts of depression in the past two years, the latest being only last February, and so it's difficult to know why his ex-wife made this choice at this time.
He naturally wants his daughter to be somewhere safe and secure, which is why he didn't hesitate to offer for her to stay with him. He also knows there's a possibility she may not want to, and is likely to be out much of the time either way. She is an attractive, intelligent, and pleasant young woman. It's very sad what she's been through, yet her future is full of hope and my intuition tells me she's more than fine.
Still, I can feel all sorts of emotional shifts taking place at the moment... the boys looked kind of flat (not their usual selves at all) when we took them to the cinema with my daughter and her friend this evening. They both said they're having mixed feelings about the move.
I'm not sure how these changes are going to effect my relationship with my boyfriend and I'll have to wait and see how it does change. I know that things between he and I will always be fine. At the same time, I'm not yet certain about our future together as I can see he is unsure at times. I know I'll need to be emotionally resilient and cautious over the coming months.
It's the first time my partner will have ever been separated from any of his children through distance like this. As he took care of the four kids for two years not long after his divorce when his ex-wife fulfilled her wish to live overseas with her partner, I know how devoted he has been to his children.
He seemed to take the news calmly and said he couldn't be selfish about it, and besides, what else could he do? He doesn't want to make it unnecessarily difficult for anyone. His only surprise is that no-one is ever too sure how stable his youngest daughter is who has had two serious bouts of depression in the past two years, the latest being only last February, and so it's difficult to know why his ex-wife made this choice at this time.
He naturally wants his daughter to be somewhere safe and secure, which is why he didn't hesitate to offer for her to stay with him. He also knows there's a possibility she may not want to, and is likely to be out much of the time either way. She is an attractive, intelligent, and pleasant young woman. It's very sad what she's been through, yet her future is full of hope and my intuition tells me she's more than fine.
Still, I can feel all sorts of emotional shifts taking place at the moment... the boys looked kind of flat (not their usual selves at all) when we took them to the cinema with my daughter and her friend this evening. They both said they're having mixed feelings about the move.
I'm not sure how these changes are going to effect my relationship with my boyfriend and I'll have to wait and see how it does change. I know that things between he and I will always be fine. At the same time, I'm not yet certain about our future together as I can see he is unsure at times. I know I'll need to be emotionally resilient and cautious over the coming months.