It happens every few weeks and always the same way... I'll be on top, getting pretty fast here, orgasm approaching, faster, I can feel it its right there and I always get so excited because I STILL haven't had an orgasm after 7 partners, long loving relationships where I feel totally comfortable, I love having sex (especially when I initiate ::which can be rare sometimes because of this long time no come thing going on) and I will feel it so strong and then I always lose it, every time. Damnit what the hell am I doing, overpsyching myself out or what... is it me could it be him, I mean I pretty much have to do everything myself for this to even start to happen... anyone else anyone?

You're concentrating on it too much.

You honestly have to surrender to it at the same time you're reaching for it. I know, I know--sounds impossible.

It happened to me MANY many times before I finally just said "forget it--I'm not going to worry about it so much" and bam! When I least expected it, it crashed through me.

Don't try so hard for it, is the only advice I can give. Almost try to hold yourself back from the orgasm, keeping yourself RIGHT on the edge of it--still do what you're doing, but don't push towards the orgasm.

You are too frantic and goal oriented... that's my take on your situation.

Don't model yourself after pornography on how to *enjoy* sexual intercourse, that's a real big mistake young guys, and others, make... you probably have female partners who are mimicking porn, too... no sexually savvy woman would put up with your technique! :)

Intercourse is not some kind of glorified masturbation, if you have that attitude, God help you!! :D

I think you need a mentor, a woman with full sexuality, full orgasmic potential, to show you how to be a good lover. Go find her!

Have a great year! ;)

I think she IS a woman, Choux.

Hm, probably, I didn't notice that, thanks. :) I stand by my *answer/opinion* except with a few small revisions. :D

Don't think about it so much, let nature take its course and see what happens.

Hehe yes I am woman... here me roar but I appreciate your responses and will take synnens advice to try keeping it on the edge haha we'll see, ill try anything. Sometimes it feels so unfair with him always getting everything and me being left in the dust.. and after he's done I'm just not really in the mood anymore to try and work for my own "end".. lordy I actually feel pissed sometimes at him and I know he can't really help it