Hello,

This is a very long story so I will try to shorten it up a bit, I sure would like to see if someone out there is able to give me some advice or at least point me in the right direction.
First I have a 4 year old grandson, my son passed away last year. My son and my grandson lived with me since my grandson was 1. The mother was never real interested in being a mom. She was homeless for a few months, lived in a tent for a few months, never had a permanent address. She went to Florida for a couple months at a time for 5 or six times. She would come over on sundays when she was in town. Any way she had no interest in being a mom until my son died last year. The day my son died she showed up to take my grandson, he really didn't even know her that well. I would not let her take him then, hired an attorney and started to fight for custody. It has been a long and costly experience. My attorney told me in the beginning that I had a very good chance of getting custody, during this past year the mom has held down a job, and has a permanent address. So right before the trial, my attorney told me that I did not have a chance because she is doing so well now. So to make a long story short, I signed papers that allows me visitation. 2 days a week. We have a guardian ad-litem, who will not take my calls or talk to me. I just got papers from her attorney this week that says that we are going to have a hearing to stop visitation. I am hurting my grandson by him being able to visit me. My grandson loves me and I love him, he is so excited when I pull up to get him and so sad when he has to go back with her. I believe that the reason that she wants to stop my visitation is because she wants to be able to go all over the country and drag my grandson with her, her boyfriend is gone right now, he leaves a couple times a year to sell his crafts at fairs etc. So my question is can she do this? I thought the guardian ad litem was suppose to look out for the child's best interest? I know that not being able to see me would hurt my grandson, he has been through so much in the last year, he misses his daddy so much, had to adjust to staying with her, it's been heart breaking. Any Ideas what I can do now? I live in Indiana
Thanks for any and all your comments
Mkj

This may depend greatly on your state, ( if in the US) some states have laws allowing grandparents rights, ( or requiring them if requested) but many states give grandparents no legal rights . So this is the first issue the laws of your state. But all you can do is fight for it.

Hi
Thanks, I live in Indiana, I have visitation right now, she is trying to say that I am harming my grandson to STOP my visitation. The only reason that I can think of is so whe will be able to go all over the country without having to deal with me.
Thanks

Fortunately for you, you live in Indiana a state that gives grandparents lots of rights compared to other states. Is your visitation court ordered? If not then go to court to get it. If your visitation is court ordered and she is trying to prove that you are a harm to your grandchild she has quite a task at hand. Also if you don't already you might want to look into a lawyer I'm not saying it will be absolutely necessary but could come in handy.

I think you made a mistake by agreeing to custody and visitation. I think you should have stuck to going for custody. But that's water under the bridge now.

You need to badger the Guardian ad liteum to force an interview with an analyst who can determine whether you present harm to your grandson or not. Then you need to get a lawyer to represent you.

I think I it depends on opportunities. If you have a chance to grow your grandson properly his mother must understand you and give him to you!

This may be of help to you. It is information pertaining to grandparent's right to visitation with the best interest of the child / children in question.

IC 31-17-5
Chapter 5. Grandparent's Visitation
IC 31-17-5-1
Right to seek visitation

http://www.in.gov/legislative/ic/code/title31/ar17/ch5.pdf

I am sadden for both you and your grandson. My son and my mom, have a special and unique relationship. My son would scream bloody murder when it came time for his granny to go home. I mean to the point of him throwing up. And she only lives 30 minutes away. (he was 3 at the time)

Now at 4, he still gets over dramatic when its time for granny to leave. He will go out on the porch and just have this broken hearted look on his face. Telling his granny how much he loves her, and that he is going to miss her. He will still have a crying fit occasionally, usually if he hasn't seen her for a few days, and she is only here for a brief amount of time.

I didn't see where you made any mention if you still had counsel? DO you still have means to obtain counsel? If yes, then seek out a family law attorney who has been successful in this area.

What specifically is she claiming that you are doing to your grandson? He not wanting to leave you?

And lastly, have you thought about changing your attitude towards her? Try making her your friend, instead of (insert your feelings here). Offer to take care of Junior while she is at the fair with her BF. Or whatever it takes. Stop making it a fight.

Aside from wanting to join BF, in the last year hasn't she grown up? She is probably not the same girl she was the day before your son died. Try just talking to her, not at her, but to her. What ever the reason is that she wasn't a mommy to junior in the beginning, she is now. Let it go. You need to focus on being able to stay in contact with Junior. And sometimes that means eating a lot of crap, taking the higher road, and trying to appease her.

And if that doesn't work... you still have the chance with grandparents rights in Indiana.

Best of luck to you.

Thanks everyone, Yes I have been trying to be friends with her since she got custody. She comes to pick him up early, I buy her dinner, chit chat whatever, I thought we were getting along good. This came out of the blue! We have been going to a counsler since January, but she is on vacation this month. The guardian will not return my calls or emails. My attorney retired last year, that's why he said to give her custody... he sold me and my grandson out! So I am looking right now for someone that is good, if I can find someone, they all say whatever you want to hear to get the retainer then leave you hanging. I guess I just have a bad taste in my mouth from all the stuff that me and my grandson had to go through.
Thanks everyone

If the GAL won't return your calls, petition the court to replace them. While the GAL is responsible for the child's best interests, it should not ignore anyone who has custody or visitation rights.

Thanks, I suppose I will have to do that, I sure can't get a hold of her.
Thanks
Mkj

When was the last time you saw junior?

Right now I see him on Monday mornings till tues. evenings. You see she wants me out of the picture so she and her boyfriend can travel all over the country selling crap that they make. {hippy wanna-bes}