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8259
Jun 27, 2008, 04:12 PM
I work with a Married Guy who is always staring at Me at work,I'm flattered of course,because He's cute.The Guy stares At Me anytime no one in our office is looking.When We talk I don't want to bring it up,or don't know how too.It doesn't bother Me.I feel if I say something,He might say I don't know what Your talking about.The thing is His stares are very lovingly,not threating.Should I just leave it alone?

Princess Buyer
Jun 27, 2008, 04:17 PM
I'd playfully ask him if he's daydreaming. When he asks you to explain, you can tell him you often catch him looking at you and wonder if he is looking at you or through you.

That may give him an out or a way to answer.

Alty
Jun 27, 2008, 04:26 PM
The question is, what are you going to do if he is interested in you? He's married, and staring isn't illegal, just ignore it.

talaniman
Jun 27, 2008, 06:23 PM
You better ignore it, and save yourself a heap of trouble at your job, and his home.

ylaira
Jun 27, 2008, 06:36 PM
peoples life around u are more than a stare

Ash123
Jun 27, 2008, 08:33 PM
The workplace can make us feel false chemistry.

Long days and long conversations with the opposite sex. It's one of the few places we can interact with the opposite sex without questions.

The problem is that it is a false sense of connection. Ignore it. It will go away as long as you do not foster it. He is seeking validation for his stares and as a married man, it is a change of pace he can risk.


But you can't - if it progressed one inch it would be a long mile to clean up.

I have been there in my younger days. It is a nightmare to date and breakup in the office. One person usually has to leave.

*Before you go there - don't.

Chery
Jun 27, 2008, 08:56 PM
I work with a Married Guy who is always staring at Me at work,I'm flattered of course,because He's cute.The Guy stares At Me anytime no one in our office is looking.When We talk I don't want to bring it up,or don't know how too.It doesn't bother Me.I feel if I say something,He might say I don't know what Your talking about.The thing is His stares are very lovingly,not threating.Should I just leave it alone?

Yes dear, you should just leave it alone. He is probably going through a stage in life where he feels the need to test his 'shopping skills' so that he can feel he still has that 'certain something' - in other words he needs his ego stroked. But, that does not mean you are the one to have to help him regain his confidence.

As for your ego, walk out and enjoy looks from those who are not married.

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_11_2.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001_ZSYYYYYYMXDE)

sokay
Jun 27, 2008, 10:41 PM
***Hmm.. I just saw my above comment on Chery's post. Haha, I meant ignore his stares! Not ignore the advice:)***

OP I think you need to be sure to ignore this to the extent that he will think you don't even notice his 'special attention'. Not only is he married, but also a co-worker. That's a 'double whammy!

I recommend DO NOT ask him what he's looking at, or even let on in any way (facial expressions, etc.) that you notice his stares. That will only encourage him. Just go right on about your work and treat him the same as you would anyone else.

If he escalates his attempts to get your attention, lets say for instance he gives you a compliment on your hair. There's nothing wrong with that in and of itself. But combined with his other behaviors, I'd recommend you only say something along the lines of: "Thanks. So how's your wife. She seems so nice, I really liked her when I met her at the company picnic." Or something like that. Hopefully he will get the message and give it up or move on to someone else.

He may be 'testing the waters' a bit to see if he can still pull some fish out. You don't want to be that fish.

And, if he's having trouble at home, then he needs to work that out. That has nothing to do with you.