I was going out with my former ex boyfriend for a year I had one miscarriage from him because I was fliping over some chick he was about to cheat on me with.. I was hurt and I still can't think about it

we still talk as friends behind his new girlfriend's and family's back. We have made love even while he was with his new girlfriend. He told me he loves me on the phone that right now is not time for me and him to go out again. My heart is broken and his being is the only way I'm happy. I don't know what is he thinking that he can get his cake and eat it to obviously since just about anything he does makes me smile although I "hate" him

well I just found out and not from him that his new girlfriend is pregnant
I'm extremely mad I want her to lose her kid =x
I don't know what to do
my thing to do is nothing absolutely nothing I can't kill her because I would go to jail and I can't tell her what me and him do behind her back since I don't want to look wrong
ugh I love my ex and there is no one to replace him I can't find it in me to move on I'm stuck and this moving on thing looks difficult

I don't even know how to explain this situatiion :confused:
I'm just mad and heart broken I don't want to be in an awkward situation with her because I might spill everything & he looks so happy with her :( & she's so called in love with him I don't want her to be in my shoes but neither do I

As long as someone can get their cake and eat it to ---they will so why do you make yourself so easily available. You see he cheated on you and you flipped out, now you are no better than the girl you flipped out about.
You need to wake up and see he is feeding you lines to string you along and has no intention of really coming back to you.

He is doing to his new girlfriend what he did to you! He cheated on you, and now he is cheating on her with you! You are serving up his cake on a silver platter! Silly, just plain silly. He doesn't love you or her! This is just the way he is assured to get laid! He actually has others on the side, beside you and his girlfriend also.

YOU WANT HER TO LOSE HER BABY? Grow the h*ll up! Have you ever heard of a thing called Karma? You are creating some very bad Karma, and it will come back to haunt you, with those thoughts you're thinking. The only reason you wouldn't kill her is because you would go to jail? but you're worried about "looking wrong" should he find out that you busted him? I think you need professional help.

He cheated on you with her, and cheated on her with you, don't you see a pattern here? If he were to come back to you, he would do it again without a second thought! You can take that one to the bank. The best predictor of future behaviour, is past behaviour. Find yourself a hobby or an another activity that doesn't involve spreading your legs, and find someone who is trustworthy, and respectful.

I don't know how old you are... so anyway,. you have to grow up and become your own person so you aren't at the mercy of every jerk who comes along and pays you some attention.