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View Full Version : Does your ex ever come back


lockport
May 15, 2008, 08:46 PM
OK this is my story me and my ex dated for over 3 years since I was 17 I am now 20 he was 16 now 19 we used to me in so deep love like he used to be obsessed over me and all but towards the end thing where every rocky he had started to hang out with his friend a lot more and started to get in the drugs and all but we still had your apt and would hang out for a little each day and he would take me out to eat but we where not together then all that faded way but like two weeks after he left me I had found out I was pregnant and I would let him know when the next apt was and give him copes of the pictures and all but he didn't care he didn't really believe me but to his mom I guesses he did care a little but we had gotten in to more fights after we broke up then ever like he tried and did hit me and I would hit back well he moved on like 3 or 4 months after he left me but he was only with her for like a month and I believe he was only with her cause she would hang out with the same people and I believe he is very inflused by his friends (and like a month ago I went out of town and had a hook up but I still find myself thinking of my ex) well at the end of feb I had lost my baby and became very depressed and had to leave for a little so I left state for 2 months to get way from it all OK like I have not seen or talked to him sice then end of jan. it is now may and I hear that he has been sayen that I did him worng and lyed about the baby and left cause I felt stupid why is he still acting like that he could have came with me he chose not to go to any apt and I know his a loser and I need to just let it go(it doesn't help that me and his mom are very close I still call her my mom and she still thinks of me as her daughter) but he was my frist love and my first for everything and I just want to know if he would ever try to come back and want to be in a relationship with me please help me... (oh by the way like a whole month after he left me he would still call and want to cuddle and all and I would let himlike a idoit but the day he did it I cryed of coures but he cryed to so hard like he didn't want to do it just wanted to thow that in there)

WhatN3XT
May 15, 2008, 10:32 PM
I'm thinking move on. I think what I read was that there is physical abuse here. If so, can't really help you too much. Maybe find a case worker that is educated about this type of relationship. Good Luck.

Romefalls19
May 16, 2008, 05:42 AM
To answer you're question... Point blank... NO! They don't

Don't try to think that he is just with her because "she hangs with the same friends" it's not worth it and it could actually be because they like each other. He wasn't influenced by his friends, just move on. Stop dwelling on the past, it's in the past for a reason.

JBeaucaire
May 16, 2008, 07:01 AM
Guys are idiots. I know, I am one.

You will never understand this guy. You were/are on different planets. He will say what he pleases and you will have no say so in that. You won't get it, you won't stop it.

Your only "win" in this situation is to not care. At all. When you hear his name in any context, you laugh out loud, face the person who said the name, and say "Next subject!"

Your life is ahead. His stupidity is behind you. Keep it there. Banish him from your thoughts and have a great tomorrow.

talaniman
May 16, 2008, 08:05 AM
we had gotten in to more fights after we broke up then ever like he tried and did hit me and I would hit back well he moved on like 3 or 4 months after he left me but
Not a good sign, and this is an indication that neither of you needs to be with the other one. This was not a very healthy relationship, and is dangerous, if you get physical with each other.

Eraserhead
May 16, 2008, 12:57 PM
The consensus of this board agrees that the ex will NOT come back, or at least 98% of the time. All the veterans here WILL tell you to let go of the ex, go into 100% No Contact so you can heal and rebuild your life without your ex in it. Reflect on the lessons of your relationship and put forth what you've learned into the next one. If they really wanted to get back with you, they know how to contact you. And there is nothing you can do; they must return on their own.

However, there's no such thing as never. It's fair to say that some couples do get back together and stay together. I guess these are the ones that are "meant to be." A friend of mine was with his girl for 8 years, then broke up for 1 year, then got back together and have been married ever since (about 2 years). It does happen, but you can't fill yourself with false hope.

I was actually just dumped 13 days ago from my girlfriend of 7 years. I'm being a hypocrite lol, telling you to assume she won't come back and move on while I still prey every night for my ex to come running back into my arms. I'm still freshly wounded and in denial.

spion_kop
May 16, 2008, 01:10 PM
To be honest, I've never hit my ex ever. There was one time where I pushed her and I did apologize immediately. There was no excuse for my behavior.

Initially we all have that false hope that our ex will return. But when reality sets in that they are gone or they find somebody else, that's when you realize that they are finally gone. I've always said this and I will say again, stop trying to control your destiny and fate because, if you believe in them, if you were 'meant to be with her' then it will happen. Life takes you on a detour at times and this may be one of them. You can't do nothing about it.
Hopefully in my case, I don't reconcile with my ex. I still am crazy about her and do love her but I wouldn't want her back in my life no more. Her personality and her character doesn't suit me especially after what she did. Then again never say never.
Keep your feet on the ground and aim for the stars. Enjoy being single because once your in a relationship/marriage/etc you may never have the opportunities like you would right now.

brian1231
May 16, 2008, 01:13 PM
In my experience, 98% of the time it doesn't work out after a BU.


That said, I too am being a hypocrite because my ex left saying how she needed to fix herself and saying how much she loved me and how much I meant to her and how she left only to fix herself and her mental problems. That was 2 months ago. Part of me is STILL waiting for her. But I am also moving on and starting to date again. It is hard because nobody compares to her, and no girl has yet lit me up like her smile could light up my spirits inside, but that day will come when another girl does so.

You should move on as well.

Jiser
May 16, 2008, 01:37 PM
No chance! Give it a few years of nc and see how you feel then.

losingit77
May 16, 2008, 02:18 PM
You're young! Plenty of more life and guys (good guys) ahead of you. Don't waste any more time on this guy.

To answer your question, yes sometimes they do come back... but then guess what? They wind up leaving again for the same reason because the reason you broke up with to begin with will always be there. Trust me! Broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years last summer, after 2 1/2 months he came back and like an IDIOT I took him back and believed when he said that things would be different. It was never the same again... it wasn't any better... if anything, it was much much worse. After 9 months, again he left for the same reason. I can never get those 9 months of my life back. All I can do now is move on and move up. Just like you should do.

Don't waste any more of your time on this loser! In a couple of months you'll look back and wonder why you were ever with him to begin with.

Cruz911
May 16, 2008, 02:19 PM
Hey, my girl left me... she didn't come back. Move on.