View Full Version : Does this make since?
ZigZag07
May 8, 2008, 10:15 AM
Hey...
Well... Im 15. And my boyfriend is 18. Yes.. I know that sounds bad. Yes it makes him look desperate or whatever, but people don't understand. Age doesn't run everything. And this is going to sounds worse... He smokes and drinks, and he dropped out of school last year. BUT! He's getting his GED, he has a job, he drives his own car and pays for his own gas, and he's the sweetest guy ever. Hes nice to my friends, drives us around, buys us things. Hes pretty much one big kid. My parents don't know we are dating, but when they found out we were just hangign out they got mad and said "i DONT KNOW WHAT 18 YEAR OLD WANTS TO HANG WITH 15 YEAR OLD" they don't get it. I really do love him. Ive never felt this way about anyone. And he loves me, I truly to believe it (?) I don't know what to do. I keep saying" 3 more years ill b 18 and we can be together all the time" but who knows wher he will be in 43 years. I don't want to lose him... I NEED Someone's HELP!!
MysteriousGrl
May 8, 2008, 10:37 AM
Do you really want to cause all that trouble with your family if they don't approve? If you have a protective family they will do whatever necessary to keep you all apart even if that means getting him arrested. And I know you don't want to spend the rest of your life with an alcoholic if his drinking turns into that! I know how it is to be young and like the bad boys and want to rebel but I suggest you take a step back and look... If he's really interested in you he will wait for you to be 18 and he will quit his drinking and smoking... and also make sure he will actually get his GED and do something with his life... You Don't want to be 18 years old taking care of him with a baby on the way or anything like that. Just take it slow and I know it's hard but usually your parents will know what's right for you. Respect there wishes.
nova225
May 8, 2008, 11:07 AM
Please be careful with this guy he might be perfect to you, but I smell trouble and it's heading straight toward me in Louisiana.
If he drinks and smokes; one day he might drive you and your friends around while he's drunk (this could be a problem). An accident might happen or he might get pulled over by the police; either way you'll have to deal with your parents.
If you're having sex with this guy please stop or be very careful. If you're parents find out they can press charges against him because you're a minor.
I feel that age doesn't matter either, but he has some issues that he needs to work out. I've actually been with a guy that was 8 years older than me.
I try to be helpful and honest; not hurtful and mean.
JBeaucaire
May 8, 2008, 05:40 PM
Three years from now he will be no better or worse a choice for you. It will be the same then.
So, if a dropout-smoking-drinking-but-buys-his-own-gas(is that an actual character trait?) guy is the best you can do, then listen to your heart and ignore every other good influence in your life.
Ignore your friends...
Ignore your parents...
Be secretive, DISOBEY your parents...
Ignore history (first love's usually end badly, so make sure this one is as BAD as can possibly be so you'll really remember it)...
Ignore the Adult/Minor issue...
After all, since you have FEELINGS for him, that means everything else that's just based on stupid things like facts and habits and real people and rules and family respect... all that should be ignored. Right?
You're 15. You're not a complete naïveté. I hope you have reached an age that your mind and common sense has SOME influence on you. If so, that's the part of you I'm talking to right now. Is your uncontrollable attraction to a guy more important than listening to ANYONE at all?
I hope not. That list above is actually a hard list to face when you're using your mind, too. Good luck, sweetie. If you're only listening to your heart, you're going to need it.
ashie_poo23
May 23, 2008, 10:13 AM
Omgg that's craaazyy!
Because my dad said the same thing about whatdoes an 18 year old want with a 14 year old && no were not together butt I mean its like I'm not with anybody && he's not with anybody, were just together but not together. I think you should be with him cuzz I know exactly how you feel && I feel the same wayy honey.
ZigZag07
May 23, 2008, 10:15 AM
omgg thats craaazyy!
cuz my dad said the same thing about whatdoes an 18 year old want with a 14 year old && no were not together butt i mean its like im not with anybody && hes not with anybody,, were just together but not together. i think you should be with him cuzz i know exactly how you feel && i feel the same wayy honey.
I know! Well... good luck to you and him! Its good to know someone else is out there to talk about this kind of stuff, evreyone else doesn't get it!
ScottGem
May 23, 2008, 10:35 AM
i know! well...good luck to you and him! its good to know someone else is out there to talk about this kinda stuff, evreyone else doesnt get it!
See that's where you are so wrong. The fact is we DO get it, but we have a great deal more experience then the both of you. So we know from experience the pitfalls and problems that can result from your situation. The fact he smokes shows that he is more interested in how he appears to his peers then his own health. The fact that he drinks, shows the same thing as well as a disregard for the law. The fact that he dropped out shows an inability to follow through on things.
But since you love him you think all those things should be ignored. Another problem is that, at 15, you really haven't experienced enough to know what true love is. I'm sure you think you do, but other people who have gone through the same thing you are going through and have had both good and bad experiences will give you better advice.
I'm not going to tell you to stop seeing him, but I will tell you to NOT have sex with him. If you do, he can go to jail. If you haven't had sex yet and you do, you may find out that's the only reason he's with you and then it will be too late.
ZigZag07
May 27, 2008, 09:28 AM
See that's where you are so wrong. The fact is we DO get it, but we have a great deal more experience then the both of you. So we know from experience the pitfalls and problems that can result from your situation. The fact he smokes shows that he is more interested in how he appears to his peers then his own health. The fact that he drinks, shows the same thing as well as a disregard for the law. The fact that he dropped out shows an inability to follow through on things.
But since you love him you think all those things should be ignored. Another problem is that, at 15, you really haven't experienced enough to know what true love is. I'm sure you think you do, but other people who have gone through the same thing you are going through and have had both good and bad experiences will give you better advice.
I'm not going to tell you to stop seeing him, but I will tell you to NOT have sex with him. If you do, he can go to jail. If you haven't had sex yet and you do, you may find out that's the only reason he's with you and then it will be too late.
Wow. Thanks a ton.
After I read that, I thought " i really need to get my head on straight" and I broke up with him. And now. I'm happier than ever.
Thanks
ZigZag07
Jun 2, 2008, 08:17 AM
Thanks FOR Everyone's HELP!
Ends up... I broke up with him. And I'm happier than ever!
Yes I miss him, but we are still tight.. so its all good!
Thanks